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My next words, spoken into his Hong Kong Phooey shirt, came out muffled. "I don't know what's going to happen. With any of this. I'm so scared. I don't think I've been this afraid since I thought Roman was going to kill me."
"Nothing will happen to you. You said yourself this won't last more than a few days. Just wait it out."
"I don't wait very well."
He laughed and leaned his cheek against my forehead. "I know you don't. Don't worry. Most of us do far more dangerous things than walk two blocks, and we survive just fine. Yeah, that car kind of sucked, but even still, nothing happened."
"It's two and a half blocks," I corrected. "Not two."
"Right. I forgot that extra half one where the sharks and land mines are."
I pulled away slightly so that I could look into his face. His arms stayed around me. "I have to find Jerome, Seth."
His smile faded. The worry returned. "Georgina...if you want to stay safe, going after him probably isn't the way to do it. You don't always have to take this stuff on yourself, you know. Let someone else look for him. Stay home."
"That's the thing...I'm not sure anyone will be looking for him. Why would the other demons want him back? They want his territory. They aren't going to be happy if he's found."
Seth sighed. "Great. Now I'm the one worried about you leaving the house."
"Hey, I thought you said everything was going to be okay?"
"Gotta be careful what I say." Eyes thoughtful, he reached up and smoothed some hair on the side of my head. "Why are you so brave?"
I scoffed. "Are you insane? Didn't you just witness my near breakdown?"
"No," he said gently. "That's the thing. You are scared. You don't know what's going on or what could happen to you. Yet, in spite of that fear and uncertainty, you're going to throw yourself out there to hunt him down. No one else would do that, and you do that kind of thing all the time."
Inexplicably, I flushed under his praise. "I was only going to do a Web search."
"You know what I mean. I think you've got more courage than anyone I know-and what's truly amazing is that it's so subtle, hardly anyone ever notices. You do so much, and it goes unseen. I wish I was that brave sometimes."
"You are," I said, growing increasingly unsettled by our proximity. I also noticed then that he was still smoothing my hair back. "What are you doing to my hair? Does it look bad or something?"
"Your hair never looks bad." He dropped his hand sheepishly. "It's just...a little messier than usual."
"I brushed it fifteen minutes ago!"
Seth shrugged. "I don't know. It's just kind of frizzy, but that's probably normal. There's a little humidity out."
"Frizzy? My hair's never frizzy."
"Georgina," he said wearily. "Considering everything else going on, I don't think you need to worry about your hair being frizzy."
"Yeah, yeah. You're right." I made a face. "I just feel like I got a raw deal here. The vampires are having a non-stop party. Me? I somehow get bad hair. Not sure the energy break is really worth it."
Seth tilted his head, face puzzled once more. "Energy break?"
"Yeah. Along with everything else, I lost the need for life energy, so I'm not-"
I stopped. The world stopped.
I met Seth's eyes, those beautiful golden-brown eyes that were filled with utter and complete shock as we both realized the full weight of what I had been about to say. His hold on me stiffened. The casual embrace suddenly became so much more. I was acutely aware of every place we were touching and exactly how much distance was between the places we weren't touching. He felt warm, so wonderfully warm, and every place he touched me tingled-not necessarily in a sexual way but in a Oh my God, it's Seth way. My entire body was on full alert, waiting and watching-and hoping-for him to touch me more.
He swallowed, eyes still wide. "So you aren't...I mean you can..."
"Yeah," I said, my own voice husky. "That's the theory, at least. I haven't really tested it..."
My words faded off because they didn't matter. My relationship with Seth had been plagued with a hundred small problems, everything from communication to trust and the myriad details in between. And always, always underneath that had been the knowledge that we could never be physically close. Oh, we'd been able to hug and do some kissing-there was even a fair amount of tongue we could get away with before my succubus hunger started stealing his life. But ultimate intimacy? Sex? Making love? It was totally off-limits, and that denial had tortured both of us, no matter how much we talked about love being the most important part in a relationship.
And now...here we were. Those barriers were removed. I hadn't tested if my succubus stealing really was gone, but I didn't need to. I could feel it, as Hugh had said. The perpetual craving that always lurked within me was completely dormant. I could touch and kiss anyone without restraint. I could touch and kiss Seth. There was nothing standing between us now.
Well, except for one thing.
A knock sounded on my door. "Georgina? Are you in there?" Maddie called.
It was like cold water in the face. Seth and I sprang apart. He backed toward the door, and I promptly sat down at my desk. My heart was pounding again. Damn it. I was going to have to talk to Hugh and get an anti-anxiety drug. "Yeah, come in," I called.
Maddie stuck her head in, surprised to see both of us. "There you are," she said to Seth. "I just got here and couldn't find you."
Seth was still in shock. "I...yeah...I saw Georgina was here and stopped by..."
Maddie peered at me. "You okay? You look a little worn out." Her eyes flicked to my hair and then back to my face. "Did you just wake up?"
Apparently, I no longer looked like I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown, which was something. I hadn't liked the way she eyed my hair. "Well, not exactly. It's, uh, been a long day." I stumbled over my words. I was so flustered, I could barely string a coherent response together. Seth's presence was like the sun, blinding me and warming me all over, and Maddie was making me feel guilty and dirty for enjoying that sun.
"Is everything okay with your family?" she asked.
"My-oh, yeah, they're okay. Still just a little crazy, but it'll, um, pass." I stood and picked up the laptop, hoping I sounded casual and calm. I needed to get out before I said something stupid. As it was, I couldn't even make eye contact with Seth now. "I really just came by for this."
Maddie studied me a few seconds longer and must have decided I was more or less telling the truth. She relaxed and seemed oblivious to me trying frantically to get to the door.
"Hey," she said, "I was thinking you might not need to go to California for beaches."
"For...what?"
"Remember our conversation at Mark's?"
"Er, yeah." Miraculously, I did. The condo thing, when I told her I had a beach itch.
"I have the perfect solution: Alki."
"Alki?" asked Seth, confused.
"It's a secret." She winked at me. "I thought that might be a good place to start looking. What do you think?"
"Sure. Sounds great." Alki Beach was a region of West Seattle that stuck out into Puget Sound. While it was a far cry from a Cyprian beach, it was, well, a beach. And if agreeing that it was a good idea would get me to the door...
"Cool! And what about dancing?"
"Huh? What about it?" I probably looked like a deer in the headlights again. This agitated state of mine didn't make for good topic-jumping.
"Teaching salsa. I mentioned it to Beth and Casey, and they were pretty excited."
"Oh. Yeah. Sure. I can do that." I was seriously about to agree to anything to escape.
Her face lit up. "Oh, thank you! Is this week too soon? I bet we could get everyone together on, oh, Thursday."
"Sure, sure, that's fine." I was almost at the door.
"Oh, thank you! This'll be fun. I'll double-check the day with everyone and e-mail you. If something comes up...I mean, I know you're under a lot of stress..."
I waved it off. "It's fine, really. Have a good night, okay?"
I put on a winning smile and quickly walked past both of them. As I stepped out the door, though, I glanced back and met Seth's eyes. My smile faltered. A thousand messages passed between us, just as they used to when we were dating. Only this time, I wasn't sure what any of them were saying.
