She moans again, shaking her head and nodding at the same time like she’s as conflicted as me.
“Possessively?” she murmurs.
“That’s how I’d take you,” I say, knowing I’m getting close to the truth I should never speak.
But we’re talking about sex. She doesn’t know I want it to lead to a whole future together…a future which crumbles unless we keep it a secret from Elizabeth, which could never work long term.
“I can’t,” she whispers. “Not like this.”
“I want your first time to be special too.”
I kiss her again, and for a time, we’re lost. But then she places her hand on my chest and gives me another shove.
Taking a step back, I close my eyes for a moment, breathing steadily.
“I’m sorry,” she says softly.
“Don’t be sorry. I just can’t look at you for a second.”
I never knew what that phrase meant before this angel wandered into the living room, thinking it was the bathroom.
“Yeah,” I sigh, the mood shattering at the thought of Elizabeth. “Shall we get these forms sorted? Then I’ve got a playdate.”
I walk to the desk, doing my best not to look at her. There’s no way to overstate the pull she has on me, tugging on every single atom, beckoning me toward her over and over.
“A playdate?” she asks, her footsteps trailing after me.
I sit behind the desk, looking up at her. Her hands are behind her back, like she doesn’t know quite what to do with them. It pushes her breasts out, making me think of somebody else noticing them, making me want to howl at the thought.
Nobody gets to see my woman like that, ever. Just me.
“I’m taking one of the Corgis to visit a possible new home. The lady already has a dog, so I’d like to see how they interact first.”
Danni sits opposite me. “Oh, that sounds awesome.”
“Do you want to come?” I ask before thinking about the consequences.
The possible owner in question is Matilda, the woman who offered me a threesome…a concept that has never interested me and, now I’ve dedicated myself to Danni, is especially unappealing.
I never could want it since the idea of sharing her with somebody else makes me sick. It makes my blood heat up.
“Are you sure?” she asks.
“Why do you sound so surprised?” I open my eyes, drinking in her tempting features afresh, her lips red from the kissing. “You’re the sexiest woman I’ve ever laid eyes on. You turn me into an animal.”
“I find that hard to believe.”
“Don’t,” I snap, taking a step, looming over her. “I never want to hear you put yourself down. Whatever reasons you’ve got, whether it was the jerks in high school, society, or anything else, don’t matter to me. Your curves are perfect. Your size is perfect. You are perfect.”
She blinks, tears in her eyes.
I soften, wrapping my arms around her, even as my manhood tries to make me turn ferocious again.
“Is this a joke, a trick, something like that?” she says, her voice torn as she presses her face against my chest.
“No. It’s real.”
It’s the most real thing I’ve ever felt, I almost add, but I somehow stop myself.
Maybe it’s the image of Elizabeth, tears of her own sliding down her cheeks, devastation wrecking her as she realizes what we’ve done.
“That just makes it more difficult, doesn’t it?” she says, looking at me wide-eyed, her lips starting to turn to their normal shade.
It’s like they’re asking me to kiss her again, to return that tempting redness. My balls have never felt so full, and neither has my heart, swelling in my chest and telling me I’ve finally found the one.
No matter what else is true, being close to her feels like the most important thing, the only important thing.
But I’ll need to tell her what Matilda said, won’t I?
Without knowing the full facts, I can’t let her walk into that situation.
“Okay, then yeah, sure,” she smiles, brushing a hand through her hair. “That sounds really great.”
“Let’s get these forms done, and then we’ll head out.”
As she fills in the form, my gaze drifts to the photo of Elizabeth, to her smiling face.
“You were right,” I say, voice dark, quiet. “This, us, being real…it makes things far more difficult.”
She looks up, nodding, biting her lip, and making me want to kiss her to push away some of the tension.
“She’d hate us, wouldn’t she?”
“I don’t know,” I say.
Danni doesn’t reply. She just sighs and turns back to the forms.
It’s the truth, technically. I don’t know.
But it’s difficult to imagine a scenario where Elizabeth would accept this.
Unless it was more than a fling, and I promised to protect, care for, and support her best friend.
Unless she knew she’d never have to choose between Danni and me because we’d fuse together and never separate.
My body is trying to make me do silly things every single second.