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“That wasn’t our deal—” I start, but Carter cuts me off with a press of his finger to my lips.
“Please, Luna.”
I know he’s asking me to agree to be his fake wife until he gets this deal with Elena, but it feels like he’s asking for much more than that. “I . . . I . . .”
“Don’t answer now. Let’s make sure Grace hasn’t talked Elena into giving her another horse. Just . . . later, okay?”
He leads me to the barn with my hand firmly in his. With every step, my mind whirls more and more. How did this happen? It’s gone from tutoring to pretending, and I was kinda onboard with that because of the art.
But now? Having met Elena, it feels so much more wrong, and guilt is growing quicker than a weed in my heart. She’s so sweet and genuine, and we’re deceiving her. And for what, a deal? I hadn’t thought past the dinner, but what if Elena does decide to work with Carter? Are we going to have to keep the charade going?
Where does it end . . . our eventual fake divorce?
I don’t get the chance to tell Carter what I’m feeling or what I’m thinking because Grace and Elena are feeding cookies to a pair of horses in neighboring stalls. “Oh, wow! They are . . . big!” I murmur in surprise. The light brown horse closest to Grace towers over her by a couple of feet at least. “Is that safe?”
I don’t know who I’m asking, but all three nod at me and Carter looks amused by my concern. “Here, you can do it too,” Elena offers, holding out a cookie to me. “They’re all big babies.”
I recoil, shaking my head as I look at the huge beast. “That’s okay. Thank you.”
“This ol’ fella is a gentle soul. He’s a big softie, I promise.” Elena proves her claim by petting him on the nose, rubbing from between his eyes down to boop his snout. He snuffles and wiggles his lips, baring long, yellowy teeth.
I make an embarrassing sound of fear as I step back quickly.
Grace laughs. “What’s wrong? Ed’s sweet.” She’s backing up her claim by playing with his mane, which hangs down low where she can reach. “He’s smiling at you.”
Between Grace and Elena, I’m feeling backed into a corner.
“Have you ever seen a monster smile right before he eats you? I think that’s what Ed’s doing,” I counter.
Carter whispers, “W-W-A-D?”
I wrinkle my nose. “Huh?”
“What would Alphena do?” he explains. “You write this badass who tackles life, and she’s supposedly based on you, so surely, you’re not scared of a horse who only wants a cookie?”
“You’re using my alter-ego against me?” I accuse. But I hate to admit that he’s got a point. Alphena would never let a horse stop her, never let fear hold her back. But Alphena is only part of me, the me I want to be. The real-world me is eyeing Ed like he might jump high enough to clear the gate of his stall and tackle me. But for what? All he seems to want is a cookie. Grace is right about that.
“W-W-A-D,” I repeat to myself over and over as I step closer by inches. Elena hands me a cookie, which I hold between delicate fingers. I curl my other fingers down in some small effort to save them if this goes awry.
I can probably draw with my middle finger as long as I keep my thumb.
“W-W-A-D?” Straightening my back, I meet Ed’s eyes . . . well, my two eyes look deep into the one of his on the side I’m standing on.
“Ed, want a cookie?” I ask, sounding like I’m asking a parrot named Polly. I hold out the cookie, my shoulders scrunched up protectively as I lean away just in case. “Here, horsey, horsey. Who’s a good horsey?”
Ed slowly leans forward, nibbling the cookie for a moment with careful eyes on me before taking the whole cookie. “Oh!” I’m partially terrified, partially excited, and completely surprised that I survived with all my fingers intact. “I did it!” I tell my audience of three, who seem to be fighting back laughter at my dramatics over something they were doing easily.
But I’ve never been around horses. That’s not the life I lead.
Maybe I can use this as inspiration for an Alphena episode, though. Alphena tackles her greatest fear . . . moose. In her back story, Alphena was driving through Michigan to go Polar Bear skinny dipping on the Canadian border when a moose stepped out of the fog at a gas station to literally try to mate with her car while she was inside getting peanut butter cups and beef jerky. Alphena stopped the moose by shouting and shooing it off, but she had hoof-sized dents and a broken hood ornament as souvenirs for her troubles.
