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I run through baseball stats in my head. Like I used to do when I was trying to keep myself from coming too fast.
But I get bored of that pretty quick too.
The minister’s an old guy and his voice drones on and on and on. Christ, where’d they find this guy?
I glance out at the crowd, though, and some of the women are actually crying. Am I missing something here?
This overstuffed ceremony is supposed to be romantic? It’s all so formal. All the ‘repeat after me’ stuff. If it were up to me, we’d all just be speaking from the heart, saying what we actually mean. Not other people’s words, written in some book from thousands and thousands of years ago. Not someone else’s script.
Which gives me an idea…
As soon as the minister finally says, “I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride,” I do take the moment to watch Janus lay a really good one on Hope. I’ve always been a voyeur and I do enjoy how he grabs her around the waist and kisses her like it’s a promise of how he’ll fuck her later.
There’s subdued laughter and titters among the gathered crowd, he kisses her for so long. When he finally lets her up, her cheeks are bright red, her eyes flushed and excited. I have to look away then so I don’t get a boner in public.
But it only solidifies my idea. I lean over to Leander. “I propose a kidnapping. And then we do this wedding the right way.”
By the way he looks back at me and grins, I can tell we’re on the same page.
Chapter 51
HOPE
At the receiving line near the back trellis archway near the aisle, Janus and I shake everyone’s hand, making sure to smile warmly for any cameras snapping pics.
Some folks are quite enthusiastic to be there—especially it seems, those whose faces I recognize the least. I suppose they’re excited to be as near to celebrity as they are. Leander is off near the cake table, and it seems as soon as everyone finishes shaking hands with Janus and me, they’re making a beeline over to the group surrounding him.
The guys’ agent, Ty, is there creating a bubble around Leander, slickly guiding all conversations. No doubt ushering all those he deems most important to the front and directing questions towards them.
Leander told Ty he’s quitting the business but he thinks Ty either doesn’t believe him or is still confident he can talk him out of it. Which is hilarious, considering anyone who knows Leander knows that once that man makes up his mind about something, moving a mountain is easier than changing it.
The last in the receiving line is my parents. Both stiff in their black mourning ware.
My back goes ramrod straight as my father approaches.
But to my surprise my father takes my hand in his and says, “You’ve done well for yourself. I’m proud of you.”
He doesn’t linger, just moves on to shake Janus’s hand.
I’m still in a state of shock, and though I probably ought to feel happy he was gracious for once in his life, I’m just a little baffled… and kind of pissed off if I’m being honest about it. He was a terrible human being behind closed doors my whole life and then here in front of everyone he’s going to try to be decent? Is it still just his normal act, or is he simply mellowing with old age? I sort of want to chase him down and punch him in the face for all the closure I ever got with the man.
But then my mother’s there. “You’re a beautiful bride,” she says, reaching forward and pulling me into an embrace. “I’m so happy for you. And your children are so beautiful. A true blessing from the Lord.”
There are tears in her eyes as she pulls back.
I nod and feel choked up all of a sudden. “I’m glad you could come, Mom.” I’m surprised, but I mean it. Out of all these nameless folks, I’m glad that she, Destiny, and Makayla are here. My dad might be a bastard but Mom must have been a young woman with dreams once too.
Really, even though this day was supposed to be just for show, it’s actually a rollercoaster of emotions.
But at least when I throw the bouquet later, I’m laughing when Destiny catches it and looks horrified. She tosses it like it’s a hot potato to Makayla, who just shakes her head and immediately throws it back.
Then we’re off to cut the cake.
But finally, finally, after eating cake and surviving the rest of the reception, I get to go back into the staging area inside the old winery. Thank God.
I used to be a pro at these industry events, but I must be losing my touch because I’m exhausted. Granted I’ve never been to an industry event that was also my wedding before, where I felt like my every move was being dissected.
