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A break came on, and I stood up from the couch, heading straight for the kitchen to find something to eat. I heard Lana begin crying upstairs, so I changed my direction, heading for the stairs instead.
“I’ve got her!” I called.
“Thanks, Sis!” Axel called back. “Hurry up and get your ass back down here, though! Game is getting ready to come back on in a minute!”
I rushed up the stairs and into Lana’s room. She was sitting up, her wails echoing around the room. I gagged as soon as I entered, the smell of her diaper making me want to vomit. I barely made it to the toilet across the hall before I began emptying my stomach.
I quickly pushed the door closed and clutched the toilet bowl again as I threw up a second time, my stomach muscles painfully clenching together as I retched.
Lana stopped crying a moment later, and I heard Axel talking sweetly to her. My stomach was still churning, but I forced myself to hold it down, not wanting to alarm Axel that something was wrong.
I moaned in pain, closing my eyes when I felt it rising again. Tears burned in my eyes. I really hated getting sick.
“Sis, you okay in there?”
I couldn’t answer. I clutched the porcelain again, throwing up a third time. Axel quickly stepped into the bathroom and set Lana down on the floor. Tears slid down my cheeks as I gagged, sobs shaking my shoulders.
“Hey, easy, Sis. I’m here,” Axel soothed. He gathered my hair and held it out of the way for me, his other hand gently running up and down my back.
“Everything good?!” I heard Christian call from the bottom of the stairs.
I looked up at Axel with fear in my eyes, shaking my head at him. I didn’t want Christian to see me like this.
Axel clenched his jaw but opened the door, shouting back down the stairs to Christian that everything was cool and to give us a few minutes. I slowly reached forward and flushed the toilet, sagging back against the wall as I covered my face with my hands, drawing in deep breaths. My stomach was still swirling with nausea, but I didn’t feel like I was going to vomit anytime soon.
“How late are you?” Axel asked me quietly as he settled Lana in his lap.
I frowned at him. “What are you talking about?” I asked him.
He sighed. “Your period, Sis. How late is your period?”
I was highly confused. “I’m not late.” But then my frown deepened as I thought about it more. My face paled, my heart rate picking up speed. Tears poured down my cheeks. “No,” I choked out, shaking my head. I looked up at Axel, my heart breaking, my soul wailing. “I’m on birth control,” I sobbed. “This wasn’t supposed to happen.”
“Fuck,” Axel swore. He set Lana back on the floor, letting her explore as he moved closer to me, pulling me into his arms. “It’s not the end of the world, Sis. You have family that will support you, and I know Christian won’t walk away from you.”
“I can’t be a mom,” I cried. “Axel, I can’t. I killed the last baby. I’m so fucked up—”
“Stop—right now,” Axel ordered. He gripped my chin, tilting my head back so I was forced to look up at him. “You’re not fucked up, Ally. Stop saying that shit. You’re going to be a great mom. This is your second chance to do things right. None of us are giving up on you. You have support, and Christian is a really good man. He’ll be here for you every step of the way.”
I bit my lip hard, resisting the urge to wail. Axel drew me back into his arms, holding me tightly. “I’m so scared,” I sobbed. I clutched my brother’s shirt in my fists. “Oh, God, Axel, I’m fucking terrified.”
“I know,” he whispered. “I’m here this time, Ally. I’m never abandoning you again; I promise. Things will be different.”
“Things are moving so fast with Christian,” I sobbed. “What if he decides this is too much? What if he walks away?”
Axel tightened his arms around me. “Then I’ll kick his ass, and when Julian can come home for a little bit, he’ll kick his ass, too. You’ll move back in here, and we’ll help you. But he’s not giving up on you, Ally. You know how fucking protective I am of you, but every bit of me tells me that Christian will never turn his back on you.”
I shook my head, staying quiet for a moment. “I don’t know if I can tell him,” I whispered.
“Then take some time to come to terms with it,” Axel soothed. “Christian will understand why you didn’t tell him the moment you figured it out. I don’t think that man is capable of ever truly being angry with you.”
