AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“I’m sorry,” Irving says. “I didn’t want to tell you so you wouldn’t feel… well, exactly like you are feeling now, I suppose.”
I force myself to take deep breaths. I try to remember that I really would have left school and likely never returned. I would have never been able to bring Tabby to Miami. I would never have had a job. My parents would actually be very proud of me now, if they could see me.
I should be grateful.
“Well,” I clear my throat, drawing myself taller, “thank you.”
Irving raises his eyebrows. “Really?”
I’m just being defensive, I remind myself.I should be grateful.
“You can be mad at him if you want,” Cal offers. “It would totally be understandable.”
Irving glares at him, and I just smile. “No. I’m not mad. You could have thrown in a campus health insurance upgrade though. I had to pay for my own bronchitis antibiotics that winter.”
Irving’s expression gets serious again. “Oh, I’m sorry about that.”
“I’m just kidding,” I smile, wiggling my eyebrows.
“Oh!” he chuckles. “Okay, I deserved that.”
We continue eating in silence, eventually letting the tension pass. It’s hard to stay in a fussy mood when there is steak and lobster right in front of you, with a cloudless sky full of stars all above.
The staff clears away the plates and brings dessert to the table, a collection of multicolored ices drizzled with mysterious syrups that smell like flowers. I take a bite of pristine white crystals, dazzled to find it explode on my tongue in a burst of pineapple, coconut, and lemon. Yet there is something more, something fragrant like lavender as well.
“This is delicious,” I sigh happily. “Is it always like this?”
Cal takes a bite and tips his head back to stare at the sky. Irving smiles with satisfaction and settles comfortably in his seat.
“Is it always like what?” he asks kindly.
I hold my hands out, fingers splayed, gesturing all around us. “Always like this. Boats and lobster dinner. Wine and stars and warm breezes. Telling stories? Laughing?”
Cal pauses for a few beats, smiling vaguely as he looks around. “It certainly can be,” he suggests carefully.
Irving doesn’t say anything. I can sense that he’s holding a piece back. Sometimes he is so open and giving, and other times he is cautious, struggling to wall off the parts of himself that are the most exposed.
But I can see through it with almost crystal clarity. He is not that complicated. I take another sip of wine, aware that I have had more than my share. But it is so delicious, I don’t want to stop yet.
Irving can sense me watching him, but he doesn’t try to distract me. He seems more at ease now than ever, even with the protections he still has remaining. I can almost see what it would be like to be even closer to him. What it would be like to be in tandem, working side by side, with Cal as well. The three of us, together, could make an amazing team. We could reach depths of harmony and synchrony that I never would have guessed existed.
“I’m glad we are all talking,” I venture uncertainly. “I’m glad… That you two are talking.”
I’ve gone too far. Cal smiles, but Irving flinches away. He swigs a mouthful of red wine, twisting his head to look far out to sea.
Cal shoots me a look, sadly agreeing that I pushed at the wrong time. Remorse twists in my heart. I thought we had crossed a barrier, but I guess I was wrong.
I think for a moment that I can retrieve it, that I can say something else to back us up to the moment where Irving was open and secure. But Cal shakes his head, as though precisely reading my thoughts. Not now. Maybe soon, but not now.
Chapter 19
CAL
As soon as the first rays of light slice through my window, I find myself awake, pulsing with energy, prepared to start a new day.
Rising from bed, I abort the coffee machine’s preprogrammed timer and let it start now. I am ready for anything today. Irving has bobbed and weaved through three days, and now it’s time for us to have a serious discussion about Keywinds.
I know that he is intrigued. Giorgio and Irving have a good relationship. They communicate almost in a kind of shorthand. They see each other as intellectual equals.
