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Will one last time hurt?
Yes,I remind myself.
My body stills and I suck my lower lip between my teeth. He’s breathing against my neck, one of his hands still crushing my throat. I’m so vulnerable like this. I hate it and love it at the same time, because it only reminds me of how he screwed everything up.
It felt like I had finally found my person, my place, the space in the world where I was accepted for who I am, despite all my awkwardness. He was my safety. The moments we shared were special to me, sacred.
But they weren’t to him.
Alexander’s fingers shift my underwear and sear the hot, silken flesh between my thighs. I can’t stop the hissing breath that slips past my lips at his touch. My cheeks heat up. They slide along my folds effortlessly—I’mreallywet.
He doesn’t let that fact slip past us.
“Look at that,” he says, moving his fingers in slow circles. “Your cunt is dripping for me.” I feel him smile, his chest vibrating against mine as he laughs. “Youcan lie to me, but your body never will.”
There’s a protest in my thoughts, but it’s tangled in my throat. I can only seem to get out pitiful little moans, as Alexander’s fingers work my core. I squeeze my eyes shut, tiny tears beading in my lashes. My body has a mind of its own, and it wants only one thing.
Him.
My nipples are hard points in my silky shirt, the soft fabric of my bra feels more like a hindrance than anything. I want his skin against mine, our sweaty bodies pressed against each other. I want him inside me.
Get a hold of yourself, Alize.
His fingers dip inside and a half-sob, half-moan slips past my lips. Gosh, I hate this. I hate him. I hate myself for how fucking good this feels. I try again to push him off me, but it’s useless. Pleasure coils deep in my belly.
It’s just like our first meeting by the lake, only worse.
Now, I know what his cock feels like. How good he is with his fucking mouth. Now I know for sure that I do want him. That there’s the promise of multiple mind-blowing orgasms at the end of this encounter. It’s just my luck that Alexander is a selfish asshole everywhere except in bed.
This is so frustrating.
His thumb finds the bundle of nerves at my entrance and I’m ready to come undone. My hips buck, and his fingers fill me in all the right places. The heat in my core turns to a low thrumming, my breaths becoming shallow pants. Alexander’s fingers work me to the edge of release with the practiced elegance of a man who knows my body well.
When he curls his index finger to hitthat spot, the levy bursts. Pleasure, pain and euphoria explodes, pulsing through every inch of me. My legs are too weak to hold me up and my body slumps against him. A scream tears from my lips as the orgasm racks me, Alexander presses his lips to mine again, swallowing my shout of ecstasy.
The kiss, his touch, the warring emotions, they all blend together, leaving me in a fever dream. For a few seconds, I lose touch with myself, with where I am, with whose lips are on mine and with what led us to where we were. I’m weightless, shapeless, free.
I wish I could live in that moment forever.
Reality starts to settle in the moment our lips pull apart.
“Do you see, sweetheart?” My whole body is so sensitive that his rough voice prickles my skin. “You cannot escape me. You’re mine, and you always will be. Your body already knows who it belongs to.”
I frown, glaring up at him. “You’re the only man I’ve ever had sex with, Alexander. I don’t know if anyone else can make me feel this way.” Truthfully, there’s a good chance that he might be right—but I would sooner die than admit that to him.
Not now, not when we’re enemies. I refuse to give him anything else—it’s already embarrassing enough that he finger-fucked me to an orgasm justminutesafter I expressed my hatred for him. I need a win, somehow.
He doesn’t like what I’ve said. It’s all over his face.
He takes his hand from underneath my skirt—I swallow the whimper that leaves me at the loss of his fingers—and pops his glossy fingers into his mouth. He holds my gaze while he does it, his tongue darting between his lips to lap my arousal from his skin.
My throat goes thick.
I look away, but his hand on my chin turns me to face him again. He wears a smile that’s everything but light-hearted—there’s anger and displeasure in the set of his lips. He looks like the monster I know he is, but it doesn’t scare me anymore.
“I’m not sure what fucking world you’re living in, Al,” he breathes. “But if you let another man touch you, I’ll fuck you in front of him then put a bullet through his skull while you watch.” His smile grows. “Be careful of the choices you make, sweetheart.”
“Fuck you, Alexander.”
