Page 294 of Filthy Truth


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“He said nothing else?”

Sheepishness whispered into her expression. “He was mostly begging not to die and for the pain to stop. He forgot his own name after a few blasts of that cattle prod of yours, never mind Anton’s.”

“What did you ask him today?”

“I wanted to know about Mom’s original mission. He said he ‘thought’ it was related to the Lockerbie incident. Is that something you’d forget? When it’s your flesh and blood?”

“I don’t know, Star. We wouldn’t, but we’re not him.”

“No, we’re not,” she concurred. “And that’s what makes me not trust him. We had tunnel vision. We were given a directive and we fulfilled our objective and we didn’t question because why would we?

“But now, with distance and time, I’ve got a lot of unanswered questions, and there’s danger in asking the wrong person the wrong thing.”

I pondered her words. “What’s the wrong thing?”

“Are the Brothers as knee-deep in the shit as the Sparrows are? Are they just better at hiding in the shadows?”

Hell.

“You think that’s a possibility?”

“I don’t have concrete answers. Not without further investigating and…” Her gaze settled on mine, loaded down with her concern and indecision. “I want to live. I want to be with you, Conor. I want to raise Katina. I want to be happy. I want us to be happy.” She lifted her hands and used them to rub at her eyes. They were dry, though, when she next looked at me. “Is that so much to ask?”

“No, it’s not, baby,” I told her softly, even as I knew Star didn’t have it in her not to seek the truth.

It was a toxic trait we both shared.

As I gently rubbed her shoulder, she whispered, “If I wait until he’s dead, which can’t be that far out, and if I suck up to him, pretend, then I can slip into his role and dismantle the Brothers from the inside.”

The hopefulness in her words had my lips twitching. “You and Aidan are more alike than you know.”

“I needed that insult after today.”

I had to chuckle. “Reinier’ll be dead by now.”

“Without a doubt. And who orchestrated his death? Who’s covering it up?”

“The Brothers,” I said slowly.

“Anton knew who Reinier was. It’s bullshit that he didn’t know Smythe and Foundry were involved too.” She gritted her teeth. “Ever since Reinier mentioned goddamn organ harvesting, this has been eating away at me.”

“You should have been open with me from the start,” I retorted grumpily.

But she shook her head. “I’m paranoid, Conor. In fact, I make someone with paranoia look trusting. That’s why I didn’t tell you.” She worked her jaw. “There comes a point where you start thinking the shadows aren’t just a trick of the light, they’re where the monsters hide in plain sight.”

Softly, I reasoned, “That makes sense.”

“I hide it from Kat because I don’t want to terrify her, but it’s different with you.” Her expression was beseeching. “You might think I’m crazy. Legitimately crazy.” Her hand grabbed mine, fingers clutching at me with a desperation that made me hurt for her. “I can keep a lid on it for the most part, but this… I thought I could. But I can’t. And you deserve better than some rabid fuckwit who spends her days covered in aluminum foil so the listening station on the moon can’t overhear us talking.”

“We’re a team, Star,” I informed her. “That means if you start using aluminum as a fashion accessory…”

She swallowed.

“…then I start wearing it too.”

Her eyes closed on a silent sob of relief.

I leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her trembling mouth. “We’re back at the beginning, aren’t we?”

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