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Letting my arms tighten around him, I whispered, “Did it stop him from going to the school?”
“Yes. It also led to shit I didn’t want to see,” he complained, but he sounded more like his normal self, thank God.
It made me tease him, “I think your da was an asshole but he was a silver fox. You’ll be hot as fuck when you’re his age.”
“You going to stick around to see me mature like a fine wine?”
My lips curved. “You going to stick around to watch my tits sag?”
“I’ll hold them up so gravity can’t attack them,” he vowed.
“That’s dedication.”
“I’m a dedicated man,” he quipped.
I cupped his cheek. “I know that already.” He tipped his head down and rubbed his nose against mine. “Thank you for sharing that with me, Conor.”
“You don’t have to thank me.”
“I do.” I gently, cautiously,warily, reached out and let my fingers stroke through his hair. He tensed at first, released a soughing breath, swallowed roughly, and then sagged into me. I knew he was forcing himself not to react, so I cut it off there and let my hand retreat to his shoulder. “I wish I’d been around when you were a kid.”
“Why?”
“Because I’d have killed that priest before he even had the chance to look at you funny.”
“Why do I believe that?”
I hitched a shoulder. “Because you know it’s the truth.”
He grabbed my hand and returned it to his head. It was very awkward, enough that if it weren’t such a serious situation, I’d have snickered, but his intent was obvious.
With a care that I wasn’t known for, I stroked my fingers through the sable locks that felt like silk and love and non-verbal promises against my skin.
Because I knew it helped me when he talked to me, I whispered, “I know I have to atone, Conor, and I know I’m by no stretch of the imagination America’s greatest parent, but I really dislike your da.”
His tension broke some at my unexpected words. “Da didn’t care about being liked or disliked. He wanted your respect and your fear. Actually, I had it easier with him than the rest of my brothers.”
“Why?”
“He accepted I was different and that my gifts weren’t what he was used to dealing with,buthe learned quickly that I was good for padding out a bank account.”
“So he was a user.” It wasn’t a question.
“Yeah, but it was for the family.” He shuddered when I accidentally touched his ear. It wasn’t a good shudder. My hand whipped away, but he rasped, “No. I want to take this back, Star. You should—”
“I should, what?”
“He’s affected how I do things for too long.”
“Did I give you your first blow job?” When he tensed, I whispered, “You were very grateful. You never told me that—”
“I’m not a virgin,” he blurted out.
“Even if you were, it wouldn’t be a problem,” I replied easily.
“I’m not and I’ve never come that way.”
“Okay.”
