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A few weeks ago, I would’ve vehemently said I wasn’t leaving, but then my dumb ass had to go and sign up for too many classes. Next semester I have less, but it’ll still be a lot with work and my time at the studio. I feel like I’ve barely had a moment to breathe in the last month and I desperately need a break.
“If Mia moves, neither of you are getting her room or moving with her,” my mom says. “She was here first.”
“Yeah, you two are basically just interlopers,” Dad jokes, pushing the broccoli around on his plate. “Why are you even here?”
“Hey,” Addie mocks being offended.
“Does this mean Mia is your favorite?” Noah asks jokingly.
I smile at him and pretend to make a halo above my head. “Of course, I’m an angel.”
“More like a she-devil,” he mutters and I can’t help but laugh, thinking Hollis would probably agree with him.
Our parents shake their heads back and forth in unison, exchanging words with a single glance. I swear they have a freakish ability to read each other’s minds.
Talk of me moving settles down and after dinner I help my mom clear the table and load the dishwasher.
“What do you think about me possibly moving?”
She closes the dishwasher and pushes the button to start it before leaning her hip against the counter.
“I think it’s a good idea, honestly. I’ve seen how tired you’ve become, and … it’s not you, sweetie. You’re running yourself ragged and you’ll end up burning yourself out. It’s not healthy. Besides, it’s not like you’re moving far away. You’ll be an hour away and we’re in the area a lot anyway, so we’ll still see you all the time. You won’t even be able to miss us.” She smiles, pulling me into a hug. Whispering into my ear she adds, “It’s time for you to spread those wings and fly, baby girl.”
She’s right, I know she is, but it doesn’t mean I’m not still scared.
* * *
I lay in my bed,sleep desperately needed but elusive.
I pull out my phone, scrolling through my contacts. I hesitate for a single breath before I hit the call button.
“Hey,” the smooth voice answers all too quickly before I can chicken out and hang up.
“You weren’t sleeping, were you?” I ask, knowing I should’ve thought of thatbeforeI rang.
He chuckles warmly. “No. What do you need? Are you okay?” Hollis asks.
“I’m fine,” I sigh. “Can’t sleep.”
“Ah,” he breathes. “Same. Is something bothering you? It’s not…”
“No, not that,” I rush to assure him. “It’s thinking about moving, getting my own place—can you tell I hate change? It’s my biggest fear, I think.”
The sheets ruffle as I roll over onto my side, my phone against my ear and the pillow.
“I think it’s natural to fear change.”
“You don’t,” I counter. “If you did you wouldn’t be here right now, recording an album.”
“It doesn’t mean I wasn’t afraid to try, or afraid of failure, but I was more afraid of regretting not taking the chance.”
“I have to push past this, don’t I?”
“Only if youwantto,” his voice is a lovely croon in my ear. “If this is what you truly want, to take this next step in your life, then do it. The fear won’t go away, but you have to be stronger than it.”
His words steel me. I can do this—and if I look at places and find nothing suitable, I won’t move, but if I do? Then, this is happening.
“Thank you,” I whisper.
