AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“So, I thought maybe we could drive out to that drive-in theater,” I say.
“I’ll have to get a sitter.”
I don’t like her tone or that she hasn’t turned around. Last night and early this morning has been bliss, but the kids are due back in a few hours. It’s almost like she’s becoming a different person. Don’t get me wrong. I still get that the kids are her number one priority, but the quick flip is leaving me with a hollow feeling in the pit of my stomach.
“No, I meant with the kids. There’s a double feature of some Pixar movies.”
“We’ll have to see.”
I know that mom code. Millie Gold, Becca’s mom, who was like a second mom to me all my life, used it. She’s saying no without saying no.
I stand up and slip in behind her. “What’s up, Livvy?”
She shivers a little, and I know she likes me using the nickname. I usually only use it in the bedroom. She turns and faces me, a cup of coffee in her hand.
“Before we involve the kids, we need to make sure this will work. There’s no reason to go public and have everyone in our business.”
I know what she’s saying, and I understand why she’s saying it. But it doesn’t mean it hurts any less.
“So, you want me to be your dirty little secret?” I bite out every word as I step away from her.
“No. That’s not what I meant. I just think that we need to make sure we’re serious about this. The kids have never had a man in their lives other than their father. Before I let another man in, I need to make sure he’s serious.”
There is something in her voice, something like fear…shaded with a bit of anger. “I am.”
“Listen, I get it. We’re good together. And, Mason, you make me feel…good. And not just in the bedroom. I haven’t been this happy in a long time.”
“But?”
“But these kids have been hurt enough in their lives, and my entire job is to lessen that pain. Having another man disappear would just break them.”
I thought the same thing before getting involved with her. That isn’t what’s bothering her. There is something deeper, something I understand.
“You said you talked to a grief counselor.”
She frowns. “Yeah. She was great. Why?”
“Did she help you deal with your anger?”
“Anger? I’m not angry.”
Oh, but she is. Maybe she doesn’t realize it, but every time she talks about the father of her children, there’s a tinge of it there.
I take another step back from her. “You’re still angry at your husband.”
“Sam? Why would I be angry at him?”
“He abandoned you.”
“What? He didn’t do that.” A flush of anger fills her cheeks.
In the back of my head, I know what I’m doing is wrong. I shouldn’t be such an ass about her husband, but I’m angry she’s using him to keep us from being a couple. My heart feels like a dagger has been shoved into it. She is, in fact, going to deny we have a relationship.
“Yes, he did. You said that he didn’t have to go on that last deployment, that he volunteered.”
“When did I say that?”
That tells me she hasn’t told a lot of people.
