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Tripp doesn’t exactly do commitment, but Adelaide is a big girl. She can figure that out for herself.
“I’m just messing with you.” He claps his hand on my shoulder and shakes me. “I was just testing the waters, seeing if you had a thing for her.”
My forehead wrinkles. “Why would I have a thing for her?”
He inhales another hit of the joint. “You two just seem like you get along, that’s all.”
“Well, she’s cool and we’ve developed a friendship, working together these past couple of months. But we’re only friends, nothing more.”
“Does she know that?” He laughs, smoke trailing out of his mouth.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I sip my whiskey.
Tripp shakes his head and looks at me as though I’m a dumb fuck. “I swear you’re clueless half the time. She obviously likes you, man. Just watch how she looks at you.”
“Bullshit.”
He chuckles again. “I’m telling you, she does.”
From the other side of the deck, Lilah lets loose a loud laugh and places her hand on Jerome, who’s apparently a stand-up comic tonight. Jerome is a decent enough guy. I’ve known him for a couple years, since we worked on a smaller production together. But seeing Lilah with her hands on him has my fist clenching in my lap.
“What’s going on with you and Lilah?” Surprisingly, Tripp’s voice is void of the usual derision it holds when he mentions her.
“What do you mean?” I sip my drink again and shift in my seat to get more comfortable.
“It’s obvious you two are avoiding each other. What gives?”
I’m not in the mood to get into it with him over Lilah tonight. I’ve had enough bullshit for one birthday, thanks.
When I don’t answer, Tripp shifts in his seat and faces me. “Look, I’ll admit I’m not her biggest fan, but it’s not because I don’t think she’s a decent person. I just think she’s needs to get her shit together before she drags you down with her. That’s all.” He tips his beer to his mouth. I open my mouth to respond, but he puts a hand up between us before I can speak. “I know, I know, she’s had a hard life, I have no idea what she’s been through, blah, blah. Well, let me tell you, my life wasn’t a fucking picnic growing up either, but you do what you have to in order to get past it.”
Listening to him voice all the excuses I’ve made for Lilah over the years brings the anger back to the surface. For the first time, I hear how pathetic I sound and what a fucking idiot I am for chasing a girl who I’ve done the unthinkable for and she still doesn’t want to be with me.
“Like bang groupies on tour buses and backstage?” I make light of his words, not wanting to further deteriorate my mood at my own party.
He claps a hand on my shoulder again and shakes me. “Now you’re getting the idea! Come on tour with me and work her out of your system.” He laughs, but his offer is tempting.
“Us actors aren’t like you rock stars. We don’t have the luxury of being in a different city every night.”
He grins. “True dat. The best part about being a musician is that you’re leaving town the next morning. No chance of developing a stage-five clinger.”
We laugh together and sip our drinks.
“Any idea when you’re headed back out on tour?”
“Nah, man. I’ve been writing a bit lately, but nothing is really gnawing on me and pushing me into the studio, you know? Until it does, there’ll be no new album and no tour.” He leans back into the lounger and glances around the patio. “Until then, I’ll have to settle for LA pussy and hope I don’t attract any bat-shit-crazy girls.”
I roll my eyes and finish my drink. We sit in comfortable silence for a bit, but my gaze keeps lingering on the group of people Lilah’s sitting with. No matter how badly I don’t want to be reminded of her rejection, I can’t seem to stop myself from looking at her.
Maybe I do understand more about addiction than I thought.
Chapter Twenty-two
LILAH
Ifelt Jimmy watching me as I laughed with Jerome. All night, we’ve played a game of cat and mouse, catching each other stealing glances at one another, but not speaking. I’m confident that we’ll be made up by tonight.
Right now, I’m the good-time girl and fucked up enough to push everything Jimmy said earlier to the back of my mind. I miss him though, and the more I drink, the more I want him.
