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“Could you stick to James?” How do I word this without offending her?
“Okay,”she says, but it’s clear in her tone she doesn’t understand what the problem is.
“It’s just…Jimmy’s my past and it’s a childhood name and—”
She places her hand in the air and smiles. “You don’t have to explain. James it is.”
“Thanks.” I release a breath, thankful she took the news so easy.
I step closer to her. “I think we did a pretty good job up there tonight. What about you?”
“I agree. We make a good team.” Her gaze dips to my lips.
Something has grown between us in these past few months. It’s not the overwhelming and crazy chemistry Lilah and I always had, more of a mutual respect and fondness for one another. But it’s obvious we’re both curious what would happen if we took the leap and actually tried dating for real.
“We do make a pretty good team,” I say, leaning in another inch.
“Let’s hope the box office numbers think so, too.” She follows my lead and raises her chin so that our lips are only an inch apart.
“Adelaide, what would you say if—”
“James! Christ, finally.”
I turn my head and crease my forehead when I see Keane twenty feet away and racing toward us.
“What the hell is going on?” I ask.
He stands with his hands on his hips, gasping for breath, before he speaks. “I got a call.” He inhales a deep breath. “It’s Lilah. Apparently she ODed and—”
I haul him to me by the lapels of his tux jacket. “Is she alive? Is she okay? What hospital?”
He shakes his head. “I don’t know anything other than that she ODed and she’s at Sinai.”
“Fuck!” I drop my hands from his chest and push through the crowd.
The valet approaches me outside the hotel, looking starstruck and a little wary at the same time. “Can I help you, sir?”
I didn’t drive here myself. I was dropped off by a driver, but I’m not waiting around for that. “I need a cab or an Uber… something.”
He nods quickly, obviously responding to the urgency in my tone, and jogs to the podium near the doors the porters use, where he picks up a phone. He exchanges a few words with whoever he’s speaking to and hangs up. “They’re going to let a cab through. Should only be a minute.”
I nod and pace. I push both hands through my hair and stop walking, pulling on the strands. It’s all my fault. If I hadn’t pushed her away, I could’ve kept an eye on her, made sure she stayed above surface level.
Desperation claws at my insides while I wait for the fucking cab.
I yank my phone from my inside pocket to check the time and find a list of missed calls.
Damn it. I forgot to take my phone off silent when we left the awards.
Using my thumb to open the screen, I pull up the missed calls and see a bunch from Keane, my manager, and one at the bottom from Lilah. My heart seizes as I press the voicemail button and bring my phone to my ear. Lilah’s message plays first, since hers is the oldest, and I listen, my heart constricting at the desperation in her voice.
Her words, sounding so hopeless, reverberate through my head and I collapse to my knees on the concrete.
If she isn’t okay, I don’t know what I’ll do. I realize now that if I thought I can survive without her, I was kidding myself. Lilah is as much a part of my life as the cells that make up my body. And if she’s gone, there’ll be nothing left for me.
Chapter Twenty-six
JIMMY
