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“You loved me!” Bree shouted through her tears. “I know you did!”
Richard pushed on like he hadn’t even heard her. “You can imagine my fucking shock when she came to me one day saying she was pregnant and the baby was mine.” All of a sudden, it was as if all the air had been sucked out of the room. There wasn’t enough oxygen and I couldn’t take a proper breath as he continued his story. “It wasn’t what I wanted, but I couldn’t just ignore the fact that I was having a kid. That wasn’t me, I always—”
“Did the right thing,” I finished for him, unconsciously knowing exactly what he was planning on saying. “Fuck, Richard. You always had to be such a goddamned boy scout.”
His smile was small and pained as those identical eyes matched my own. “If I was going to be a father, I was going to do right by her and my baby.”
“So, you married her.”
“So, I married her,” he repeated. “It wasn’t an ideal situation, and I wasn’t happy, but I tried my best to make it work. I tried to be a good husband. For five years of my life, I did my best. I suffered the loss of my brother, not understanding why the one person I was closest to my entire life suddenly hated me so goddamned much he refused to even speak to me. Five miserable years, trapped in a hell where every word out of your mouth was a fuckinglie! There was never any baby.”
Everything was moving too fast, my world was spinning out of control. I couldn’t keep up. In the span of a few short minutes, everything I’d believed to be the truth for the past five years was deteriorating around me. “What?”
“Yeah.” He laughed humorlessly. “I heard her on the phone one night with one of her bitch girlfriends. When I confronted her, I finally got the whole twisted, fucked up truth from her. She knew I had a brother. She knew I was always too careful to get her pregnant. She saw an opportunity to trap me and managed to destroy both of us in the process. If she got pregnant by mytwin, no one would ever question whether or not the baby was mine.” He looked back at Bree, his eyes cold and callous. “Isn’t that right, Bree? At least that’s what I overheard you admitting to on the phone.”
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I spoke quietly before rage finally took over, then I boomed, “Is this some kind of sick fuckingjoke?”
“Believe me,” Richard continued, “I wish it was.”
“I only did it because I love you!” Bree shouted, her whole body shaking and unnaturally pale.
There was no sting, no ache in my chest at her declaration of love for my brother. And it was at that very moment that realization came crashing down on me. I never really loved this woman. I’d been young and stupid. I was in love with theideaof being in love. It was never about her. What I felt for Navie completely eclipsed the memory of what I oncethoughtI felt for Bree. I was completely, madly in love with her. What I had with her was something I had never experienced before. And I currently had two people standing in my apartment blocking my path to the woman I needed to get to more than I needed my next breath.
I was officially done.
Turning back to face the woman I once thought was everything to me, I felt nothing but hatred. “You’re a twisted fucking bitch,” I spit. “I’ve never hit a woman in my life, but if you don’t get the fuck out of my apartment in two seconds, I’ll be tempted to reconsider my stance on that.” Fear blanketed her face as she took a step away from me. “And you betterprayI never see your face again, or so help me God, I’ll make you wish you’d never been born.”
Richard didn’t so much as spare her a glance as she stormed by him and out the door, his eyes trained firmly on me the entire time. I didn’t know what to say. My brain was muddled and weighed down by everything I’d just heard. I couldn’t gain a firm grasp on anything. “There’s a lot we need to discuss, Row.”
“Yeah.” I nodded. “I know, I just… I don’t have a clue where to start.”
“Well, first, I’m thinking you need to go find your girl and work shit out, yeah? Everything we have to say to each other will keep until then.”
Guilt and regret seeped into my bones as I stared into my brother’s face. Awareness of just how much I missed him enveloped me, leaving me chilled to the very core. I’d lost five years with the person I’d always been the closest to, all because I had been too prideful and stubborn.
As if sensing where my head was, Richard stepped forward and put a hand on my shoulder. “You’re my brother, Row. Nothing ever has or ever will change that. Go make it right with Navie. Then we’ll work on our shit.Go.”
Pulling him in to me, I held on tightly, slapping his back in a firm hug before stepping back and rushing out the door. He was right; what we had to discuss would keep. I needed to deal with getting Navie backnow. Then I could work on repairing my relationship with my brother.
I hadn’t slept for shit. The image of Navie crying was pinned to the backs of my eyelids every time I closed my eyes. I called her phone too many times to count. I showed up at her apartment and sat outside her door before being removed by security with the threat of the cops being called. Normally, that wouldn’t have scared me, but running the risk of being locked up would have put a major snag in my plan to get Navie to talk to me. So begrudgingly, I left. But not before yelling through the door that I wasn’t giving up.
I texted, I called, I left voicemail after voicemail. All of which had gone unanswered. Rolling over onto my back, I scrubbed my hands along my face, trying to wipe away the dregs of exhaustion, which were clinging to me. Sunlight poured through my bedroom windows, painting everything in a beautiful golden glow that was a complete contradiction to my dark, gray mood. The clock on my bedside table glowed red, the numbers telling me it was just after seven in the morning. Would she come in to work today? Would she call in and attempt to avoid me? The only relief I felt was knowing that she’d eventually have to turn up in order to do her job.
Shoving from the bed, I walked into my bathroom to splash water on my face. The reflection staring back at me was almost unrecognizable. My skin was pale. Dark circles shadowed beneath my eyes, muting their icy blue color and making them appear dull. Stress carved every crease and line of my skin even deeper, making it look like I’d aged years overnight.
The shrill sound of my phone ringing from my bedroom brought me out of my stupor and I ran to where it lay on the nightstand, hope causing my heart to thunder in my chest.
“Navie?” I asked, not bothering to look at the screen.
“That would be a no,” the voice on the other end spoke.
My entire body slumped in defeat as I sat on the bed, rubbing my forehead with my free hand. “Lauren.” The disappointment in my voice was evident.
“Well, good morning to you, too, sunshine.”
I didn’t have the energy for our usual back and forth. I needed to shower and get dressed on the off-chance Navie came in to work. If not, I needed to prepare for hours of stalking. I had a full day ahead of me.
“Look, Lauren, I’m not in the mood right now. I need to—”
