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“Yes, do that. All of those,” Parker said, making everyone chuckle.
It was so weird seeing Sebastian there, in this space with my friends, talking and interacting with them. It hit me then, how Sebastian had been in my life longer than anyone except the three other people in this room. Yeah, my dad was around, but I didn’t count him because I knew he didn’t give a shit about me and never had.
“I used to write,” Sebastian told them. “Nothing serious. Maybe I’ll get into it again and will write my own movies one day.”
“I did say you should start writing again.”
“And I said you should start drawing again,” he countered. “I’ll start writing when you start drawing. Deal?”
I glanced up to see my friends watching us again. I scratched the back of my neck, trying not to make eye contact. It was clear Sebastian could tell what was going on because he tilted his head down some and gave me a small smile.
“I’m gonna get the food going. You guys wanna go outside?” Marcus changed the subject. He was good at sensing shit like that.
We helped him take everything to the back deck, Marcus getting the grill going for dinner. The conversation went on from there. Sebastian got along really well with the guys. He asked Corbin about his Instagram, said he didn’t officially follow but that he did peek at it from time to time. He also asked about his career as a PT.
They were all laughing and talking, sharing stories from when we were kids and asking about Sebastian’s childhood. He didn’t seem to hold anything back, wasn’t afraid to let these new people in, even knowing they could share whatever he told them. There were people out there who would pay for bits and pieces of Sebastian’s life, and yet he was still so fucking open and honest.
We were in the middle of eating, all of us at the table on Marcus’s deck, listening to Corbin launch into a story about when we were teens.
“So…we’re all at Parker’s house. His dad was supposed to be gone at work for the night, so that’s why we stayed there. Park had a crush on this total-piece-of-shit guy,” Corbin explained.
“Ouch,” Sebastian replied.
“No, he really was an asshole,” Parker added. “He was that boy who was down for a little head from a guy as long as no one knew, and then would lie about it afterward.”
“Shit. I’m sorry,” Bastian said.
Parker waved off the concern. “No, it’s fine. I was young, dumb, horny, and really wanted to know what it was like to give head. That’s how it started. The dumb part got worse as I kept doing it and thought I was in love with him. Ugh. Holy fuck. Talk about history repeating itself. I’m still going on bad dates, falling for guys and getting hurt.”
“All right, let’s not go there tonight. Someone take Parker’s wineglass,” Marcus said.
“It’s okay. We love you.” I wrapped an arm around him and kissed his temple.
“Thank you. I love you too.”
Still, I took the glass from him and handed it to Corbin behind his back. Sebastian and I had only had one drink, but the others had kept up.
“As I was saying,” Corbin continued, “Parker’s upstairs practicing his blowjob skills—”
“Which I’m fucking incredible at, by the way,” Parker interrupted.
“And,” Marcus picked up the thread, “I’m annoyed with all of them because Corbin is trying to spy on Parker and the prick, while Declan is pacing like a protective big brother…”
“In my defense,” Corbin replied, “I wasn’t a pervert, just really hard up. My only sexual experience up until that point was Marcus giving me my first kiss,” Corbin admitted, which was big. He didn’t typically say shit like that to anyone but us, so that meant he trusted Sebastian.
“I get it. I’d kissed a few girls but didn’t lose my virginity until Declan at twenty-two,” Sebastian replied, and fuck my life, I almost died. There was a small lull in the conversation, and Parker darted a glance my way before he continued speaking, pretending they didn’t get that truth bomb.
“Of course, my dad came home, and these dorks couldn’t come up with a story. Dec said I wasn’t home, Marcus said I was asleep upstairs, and Corbin said I was at work at McDonald’s, which…I didn’t have a fucking job!”
“Hey! Sorry I’m not a liar!” Corbin defended himself.
“You couldn’t do better than that?” Park asked, the two of them then arguing nonstop.
“I’m sorry I exposed you to them. This has to be difficult for you,” I teased, but Sebastian just looked at me, giving me one of his brightest smiles.
“I love it. This is perfect,” he said softly, and damned if I didn’t feel the same.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Sebastian
“So what happened next?” I asked, wanting them to keep going. The guys were almost like they were on the podcast—opinionated and argumentative with each other, but you could also see and feel the love behind it. They knew they could be their truest selves together, and so they never had to pretend to be anything they weren’t. They never had to be perfect.
