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Thomas didn’t need to be told twice. Anything was better than sitting here, helpless to change the course of events. Thomas would always rather have something to do, some tool in his hand, some path to follow, no matter how narrow or dangerous. He rose and hurried out of the pew, stepping on several feet as he did so.
He raced through the Institute to the foyer, not bothering to pause and catch up his coat. He pushed his way out into the cold, only to see Matthew’s borrowed carriage already rolling out the Institute gates. Bloody hell.
Thomas wondered if his parents would mind if he helped himself to their carriage and gave chase. They probably would, if he was being honest with himself, but—
“We can take my carriage.” Thomas spun in surprise to see Alastair standing behind him, calmly holding Thomas’s coat. “Don’t look at me like that,” he said. “Clearly I was going to follow you. There’s nothing I can do in there, and Cordelia’s already gone.”
Gone where? Thomas wondered, but there was no time to process the thought: he took his coat from Alastair and shrugged it on, grateful for the warmth. “I’m going after Matthew,” he said, and Alastair gave him a dark look that clearly said, Yes, I knew that. “And you don’t like Matthew.”
“After what Charles has just done, your friend Matthew will be desperate for a drink,” Alastair said. There was nothing accusing or contemptuous in his tone; it was matter-of-fact. “And I have much more experience looking after drunks than you do. Even talking them out of drinking, sometimes. Shall we go?”
Thomas started to object, though he wasn’t entirely sure what he was objecting to, but the Carstairs carriage had already rolled into the courtyard, the driver swaddled against the cold in a thick blanket. Alastair had hold of Thomas’s sleeve and they were marching down the steps; a moment later, they were in the carriage as it began to lurch across the ice-slippery courtyard.
On the way to the terrible Christmas party at the Institute, Thomas had told himself to enjoy the time he had in the carriage with Alastair. Though Alastair had been in an odd mood that night, with a sort of suppressed excitement to him, as if he were considering whether or not to spill a secret.
He hadn’t, of course, spilled anything; still, Thomas had enjoyed being in such an intimate space with him. And, he had told himself, it was all right to enjoy it, as long as he kept in mind that Alastair was not going to be a permanent fixture in his life. That Alastair was most likely leaving as soon as his sibling was born.
He tried to enjoy it now, but his stomach was too knotted up over James and his family, over Matthew, over everything that had happened. The carriage bounced over a rut in the road; Thomas steadied himself and said, “He’s stopped drinking, you know.”
Alastair looked out the window. He blinked against the wintery light and said, “He’s still a drunk. He’ll always be a drunk, even if he never drinks again.” He sounded weary.
Thomas stiffened. “If you’re going to say that sort of thing to him—”
“My father stopped drinking a dozen times,” said Alastair. “He would go weeks, months, without a drink. Then something would happen—a disappointment, a minor setback—and he would begin again. Have you ever wanted something,” he said, looking at Thomas with a sudden directness, “something you knew you should not have, but that you could not keep away from? Something that occupied all your waking and dreaming thoughts with reminders of how much you wanted it?”
Thomas was once again conscious of the intimacy of the space he shared with Alastair. He remembered Barbara giggling about kissing Oliver Hayward in his carriage: the shared private space of it, the pleasure of misbehaving. He was also sure he was probably turning tomato red above his collar. “Matthew needs to hear that there is hope.”
“I didn’t say there was no hope,” Alastair said quietly. “Only that it is a difficult journey. It’s best for him to know that, so he can be prepared for it.” He rubbed at his eyes with a gesture that made him seem younger than he was. “He needs a plan.”
“He has one,” said Thomas, and he found himself explaining Christopher’s treatment plan, weaning Matthew off alcohol gradually and deliberately. Alastair took this in with a thoughtful look.
“It could work,” he said. “If Matthew abides by it. Though I gather you fear he won’t, or we wouldn’t be following him with such urgency.”
Thomas could hardly argue that point; besides, they’d arrived at Matthew’s address. Leaving the carriage, they headed upstairs, where Thomas used his key to let them into Matthew’s room, praying to the Angel as he did so that Matthew had not yet done anything dangerous, self-destructive, or embarrassing.
He was surprised to find Matthew sitting in an armchair by the fire, one hand on Oscar’s head, his legs crossed, reading a letter. He looked mildly over at Thomas and Alastair as they spilled into his flat.
“Thomas,” Matthew said. “I see you’ve come to discover whether I have or have not plunged myself into a hogshead of brandy. And you’ve brought Alastair, noted handler of drunks.”
“Well?” said Thomas, who saw no point bluffing. “Have you been drinking?”
Matthew looked at Alastair. Thomas had known Matthew might see his bringing Alastair here as a betrayal of sorts, and he’d been braced for it. But Matthew looked rather more like a general who had finally met his enemy on the battlefield only to discover that they both agreed the long years of bloodshed had not been worth it.
“Only what Christopher has given me,” Matthew said. “I suppose you will have to take my word for it. Or decide if I seem drunk to you.”
“It isn’t really about seeming drunk, though, is it?” said Alastair, unbuttoning his coat. “My father had to drink, in the end, simply to seem normal.”
“I am not your father,” said Matthew frostily.
“You are much younger. You have been drinking a much shorter time. Your chances are much better,” said Alastair, rolling up his sleeves. Thomas did not have time to ponder how Alastair’s forearms looked as if they belonged on a statue by Donatello, because Alastair was already striding across the room to the shelves where Matthew’s bottles of spirits were kept.
“Thomas says you have given up drinking for good,” Alastair said. “Yet you still have all this booze here, I see.” He selected a bottle of whiskey and uncorked it thoughtfully.
“I haven’t touched it since I came back from Paris,” said Matthew. “But I do still have visitors. For instance, the two of you, although I’m not sure if this is a visit or a rescue mission.”
“Visitors don’t matter,” Alastair said bluntly. “You need to get rid of this stuff. All of it.” Without warning, he strode to the open window and began emptying the bottle out of it. “Free liquor for the mundanes,” he added. “You’ll be popular.”
Matthew rolled his eyes. “Yes, I hear mundanes prefer their drinks poured on their heads from four stories up. What exactly do you think you’re doing? Thomas, make him stop.”
