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The scent of his cologne was making my stomach turn, and I pulled away quicker than I should have. Not that the embrace was necessary. A quick glance over at Eli told me that he was pissed.
Good. I might barf on the street, but at least he would learn to stop pushing me around. Caleb’s easy smile was back on his lips, and I wondered how I’d ever been so in love with him.
“We will have to get together sometime,” I said. I wanted to get away from him. This game was only fun while I was in control, and I didn’t need Caleb spilling the beans. “It’s nice to see a friendly face here.”
“Definitely.” Caleb glanced over at Eli. He didn’t have the good sense to be scared of him. “Looks like you might need it.”
I placed myself in Eli’s path before he could go after Caleb. “I’ll see you around, Car.” He looked at me with wistful eyes before he headed in the opposite direction. Watching him leave, I was surprised that I felt nothing other than revulsion. And even that was unexplainable. Sure, Caleb helped to feed the worst parts of me, but I would have found a way to self-destruct without him.
He was a shit boyfriend. After what happened, he had texted me twice before deciding it wasn’t worth it. Last I heard, he was fucking my supposed best friend. I had been going through too much to care.
Still, it was odd to feel so much vitriol when I looked at him.
“What the fuck was that?”
I shook my confusion for Caleb away before turning back to Eli. He looked like a bull ready to skewer me with his horns. Only, I wasn’t afraid. Maybe I should have been, but I knew Eli was all bark and no bite.
And after last night, there was a part of me that wondered what it would be like to direct that anger we felt towards each other into something more explosive. I might be looking for a fresh start, but I wasn’t a completely different person, and the idea of fucking Eli felt like an act of rebellion.
“Caleb’s my ex-boyfriend.” I walked past Eli, brushing his shoulder as I went. “We were catching up.”
“Looked a lot more like you were seconds away from fucking one another.”
This made me snort. Caleb and I hugged, and it was incredibly platonic. But it appeared that Eli was determined to be in his feelings over the situation, and I was determined to prove a point to him.
“What if we were,” I said. He’d fallen in step beside me. “It’s not like I have any reason not to. We didn’t end poorly.”
We hadn’t really ended at all. My mother and brother were brutally murdered, and I had been too traumatized to give Caleb a second thought. But Eli didn’t need to know that either.
The energy rolling off Eli was tense, and I worried that he was going to snap at any moment.
“Do you want to go to the warehouse?”
I stopped, surprised by the question. I shouldn’t have been. Eli was always in control. Just because he’d snapped last night, didn’t mean that I was going to be able to push him over the edge with a simple hug. The idea felt silly now.
“What?”
His dark eyes looked at me, and I could see that he’d shut down. The walls that he surrounded himself with were firmly in place. Disappointment bloomed inside of me even as I told myself this was for the best.
Men like Eli, who craved control above everything else, were dangerous. And I didn’t need any more danger in my life.
“I was looking for you to see if you wanted to go back to the warehouse. We can set up your supplies.”
The light was beautiful today, and a part of me was eager to get started. But once more, I was confused by the shifting in Eli’s countenance. “What are you going to do?” Last night, when he offered me the space, I’d been ecstatic and wary. My calling him out led to our kiss. Now, I suspected that what really led to it was his desire to shut me up.
“I need to catch up on some reading.”
The words were simple enough, and I’d realized Eli was a bit of an academic, but did he really want to just sit around and watch me paint?
I sighed. Fuck it. If Eli was willing to go, I suppose it didn’t matter.
“Let’s do it.”
CHAPTERNINETEEN
I didn’t know what the hell I was doing with Carla. Last night, we’d kissed, or rather, I’d devoured her. And it had taken everything in me not to climb into her bed and see if she was as turned on as I was from the whole thing.
When I saw her with that blond-haired fucker, I’d wanted to rip him to shreds. He looked at her with open adoration and a little something else in his eyes that made me wary. It was a familiar look. Like he wanted to absolutely ruin her.
