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Oh, he was still the easygoing, joke-telling goofball I’d fallen in love with, the life of any party, but lately he’d been so nervous about everything that it was beginning to make me nervous. He watched me. It wasn’t like glancing over at someone once in a while; it was actual staring. It drove me crazy because I was used to having my own space. Privacy was hard to come by in a one-bedroom apartment even when your spouse wasn’t acting like a lunatic.
I didn’t remember feeling so closed in when I’d lived with my aunt and uncle, and our apartment hadn’t been much bigger even with an extra room. We’d given each other plenty of space to do our own thing, and we’d spent a lot of time outside, which had helped.
I let my irritation with Alex simmer while I drove to work, but in the back of my mind I knew why I really felt so anxious. I’d finally agreed to tell our families about the baby. Hanukkah and Christmas were coming up soon, and he wanted to spread the news before everyone started gathering for the holidays.
Alex had asked if I wanted to go to New York for Hanukkah and try to make peace with my family, but I’d decided against it. I just couldn’t make myself go begging on their doorstep for forgiveness when they’d been so awful. When I’d asked Alex if he wanted to go to Oregon, he’d shaken his head and said that we’d just seen his family. As if he didn’t want to see them every chance he got. I wasn’t sure if he was trying to make me feel better or if his finances looked as bleak as mine after our spur-of-the-moment wedding and move, but we’d come to the conclusion that we’d stay home in Missouri this winter and spend the holidays as newlyweds.
I got to work on time, barely, and sat down at my desk. I sighed as I booted up my computer and put my purse away. It was going to be a long day of work and homework, and I’d been exhausted lately.
I knew the exhaustion was because of the baby, and I should probably be trying to get more rest, but I didn’t have the time. I was still planning on graduating on schedule and at the head of my class. If I could just keep up the pace until graduation, I could rest for the last month of my pregnancy. That was the plan, anyway.
Now that I’d had more time to get used to the idea, I was feeling more optimistic about our new addition. I’d always planned on having a family, and complaining about the timing began to feel petty after those first few days. Women would kill to have the life I led: a handsome and kind husband, a good job, and a safe place to live. When it came right down to it, I’d just been overwhelmed by all the changes that had happened so quickly.
I hadn’t been good with change in a very long time, not since my parents had died and my entire world had been upended.
I jumped when my phone rang from inside my desk, and I scrambled to grab it when I realized I hadn’t silenced it for the day. I was too preoccupied lately.
“Hello,” I said quietly, leaning over a little so no one could hear me.
“You never answered if you were coming to the party,” Hailey said, her voice coming through the speaker like a megaphone. “I’m trying to get a head count.”
A head count? Who was this, and what had she done with my best friend?
“What day is it?” I stalled for time, wondering how I could get out of going without hurting her feelings.
I loved Hailey, and if she’d asked me to do anything else, I’d have said yes in a heartbeat. However, spending time with Sean sounded like torture, especially now, when all I wanted to do was lie around on the couch when I had any time to spare. I sighed. Even though I dreaded it, I’d still go. I wasn’t about to miss my best friend’s party, no matter how much I hated her boyfriend.
“It’s on the twenty-third,” Hailey said. “And you have to come. It’s a white-elephant party, so you and Alex each need to bring a present.”
“I’ll be there,” I said, my voice low as I glanced around the open office again.
“Yay,” Hailey said. “I swear, I never see you now that you’re a married lady.”
“I see you in class twice a week,” I replied.
“Oh, you know what I mean,” she said. “You’ll be there?”
“We’ll be there,” I confirmed.
“Excellent!” She said with a whoop. “I’ll let you get back to work now.”
“Thanks,” I replied drily, hanging up. I silenced my phone quickly and tucked it away just in time as one of the partners walked up to my desk, asking for a client file.
