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I doubt I will. But I must have dozed off at some point because I wake in the wee hours with a start. Anxious. Disoriented. It takes me a moment to register that Mick is still lying behind me, his arm draped over my hip. When relief rushes through me, I realize it was the fear of losing him that had yanked me out of sleep.
Through the still darkness, I absorb the feel of his body heat and listen to his breathing. It’s too fast for him to be at rest. Dreading he might be on the verge of another nightmare, I carefully turn with my heart in my throat. He’s wide awake and looking at me. His eyes are haunted in the shadows. How long had he lay like this, giving me comfort to make sure I slept while he couldn’t?
My fingers brush over the arch of his brow. “I want you so much, but it feels like you’re slipping away.”
“I’m right here, beauty. You have me.”
“Not all of you.”
“You own me.” He takes my mouth in a deep, passionate kiss. “Can’t you see that?” He puts my hand flat on his chest, right over his pounding heart. “Can’t you feel that?” He lays me on my back and nudges my legs open. “I’m yours.”
The next couple of hours pass in a sensual blur. I’m insatiable. Gluttonous. I grab at him with greedy hands, my nails raking across his damp skin, my mouth working tirelessly over his hard body.
And Mick’s need for me is just as ravenous. Love bites to my neck and breasts, relentless sucking of my nipples, constantly fucking me with his cock or his fingers or his tongue. Still it’s not enough.
Our lovemaking is frantic, tinged with an anguished despair as if each time could be our last. It’s nearly 3:00 a.m. when—sweaty, exhausted, and sore—I finally collapse onto his chest.
He closes his arms arounds me and kisses my temple. “Sleep now, beauty.”
Micah
Fourteen years earlier…
There’s pounding in my ears and it feels like my head’s been hit by a sledgehammer, then run over by a Mack truck just for fun. I can’t openmy eyes. But there’s a weight on my chest and something soft tickles my nose. I’m not even sure where I am. I manage to pry one eyelid half open.
Daylight streams through the window of my apartment. I squint against the sun’s cruel glare and look down. Sable curls? Disbelief, amazement, and happiness rush through me at once. Dee. It’s Dee. I’m in bed with Dee. But how? My fuzzy brain grapples to compute. If it’s a dream, I don’t want to ever wake up. I want to lock it up in a magical bottle, so that I can conjure her up and feel her light on my darkest days.
“Micah! Open this door. Now!”
Papa T? What was he doing here—in my dream? Dee murmurs beside me, then shifts, her hair falling away from her face.
What the fuck?A nightmare unfolds in front of me. I shove away from this girl who’s not Dee and jump off the bed. My heart breaks all over again.
“Who’s at the door?” she asks groggily, pulling up the comforter that Mama T had picked out for me.
Disgusted with myself, I gather her clothes strewn near mine on the floor and toss them to her. “Get dressed.”
“Hey.” She huffs. “What’s your deal?”
Ignoring her question, I pull on the jeans and top I’d been wearing last night. My memory returns through the heavy cloud of alcohol. I’d been at a teammate’s party when I should have been here studying to get my ass off academic probation. My student advisor warned that they could pull my scholarship. Most days I wished they would. Let someone else decide my fate for me. I was doing a lousy job of it myself.
The party was in full swing when I arrived alone. I greeted the guys, went through the motions of high fives, and played my role of the carefree freshman out for a good time. The usual groupies were there along with some unfamiliar faces, including a clique of sorority girls that were probably taking a break from the frat boys to scratch their jock itch. If so, they’d come to the right place. New girls were like throwing fresh meat into a cage of hungry lions. My teammates were all over them. But tired of the usual scene, I wasn’t looking to hook up. I’d just come for the free booze.
There was plenty of it on a table in the living room, but then I’d have to socialize. Rejecting that option, I’d made my way to the kitchen. Jackpot! I’d already had a few drinks before I arrived, courtesy of my neighbor. As long as I paid, he supplied the goods since I’d gotten caught trying to pass off a phony ID at the nearby liquor store and couldn’t go back.
I filled a red plastic cup with rum and a splash of Coke. Chugging the dark liquid down, it burned like a bitch, but added to my buzz to takethe edge off. I wiped my mouth on my sleeve and filled the cup again, belting it back in two big gulps, seeking the numbness I craved. After another, I switched to beer to pace out the night.
As I was crouched down to grab a bottle of Miller from the cooler, I heard the clicking of heels on the tiled floor. I looked up to find a pair of long, shapely legs saran-wrapped in blue jeans that stretched to Heaven or Hell, depending on your perspective.
I straightened to full height. Her face was unfamiliar. But attractive with a nice smile. I might have tried to smile back if not for the hair. It was a lighter brown than the rich sable I hadn’t forgotten, but it curled like spirals past her shoulders. No way! I didn’t need any more reminders.
“Excuse me.” I brushed past her, but she circled my bicep with her hand causing me to stop.
“Are you leaving?”
“Yep. Not my scene tonight.”
“Mine either. I’ll go with you.”
