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I hurt everywhere and I wanted my Gran and my mom.
“I don’t want to embarrass you,” Charlie said through the door a little while later. “But you’ve been in there a long time and I’m getting worried.”
Using my sleeve to gingerly dry the tears off my face, I straightened my shoulders and opened the door.
“Thanks, but I’m fine,” I said, brushing past him into the room and crossing my fingers that he wouldn’t mention the tears in my eyes.
“Look,” he said, taking a step toward me. “I’m tryin’ to do the right thing, here. I’m not sure why you’re so pissed at me—”
I laughed, the sound coming out high pitched and awful. I couldn’t help it. Did he remember nothing? Did he think that because he’d stepped in to help me—which I was grateful for—everything else was just forgotten? I knew that I looked like a lunatic, but I couldn’t stop the humorless laughter. He was the one who’d gotten me into this mess. He was the entire reason that I could never go home again.
“You don’t know why I’m pissed at you?” I finally asked incredulously. “Are you for real?”
“You asked me to take you where you wanted to go, so that’s what I’m doing.”
“I wouldn’t have had to go anywhere if it wasn’t for you!” I said, my fists clenching at my sides.
“I didn’t make your dad an asshole,” he shot back.
“No, you just showed up at my house,” I snapped. “And gave him an excuse to beat the crap out of me.”
Charlie’s head jerked back in surprise. “What?” he asked, his voice so quiet I had to read his lips.
“It doesn’t even matter,” I replied, my throat growing tight as I fought off more tears. “Thank you for giving me a ride, I know you didn’t have to.”
“No,” he said, taking another step toward me. “Explain what you said.”
“The fuel was already poured,” I said tiredly, sitting down on the edge of the bed when the room began to sway. “You just lit the match.”
“Vera?” Charlie said as I leaned sideways. “Hey, you okay?”
“I’m just tired,” I mumbled, letting my eyes drift closed. My feet were still on the floor and my body was twisted in a way that was really uncomfortable, but none of that mattered as I let myself relax into the bed.
“Vera?” Charlie said, his voice coming from right above me. “Shit.”
He gently lifted my feet onto the bed and slid off my shoes as I drifted in and out. After that, I didn’t remember anything.
The next day, I woke up freezing and so sore I could barely move. At some point during the night I’d burrowed under the musty comforter, but it didn’t seem to work against the chill that felt like it was coming from deep in my bones.
Charlie was across the room talking to someone but I didn’t even have the energy to see who it was.
“Yo, she’s out of it man. I don’t know how the hell I’m gonna get her back on the bike.” He paused. “I didn’t have any fuckin’ choice, alright? I couldn’t just leave her there.” Another long pause. “Yeah, bring the truck. By the time we’re on the road every fuckin’ cop in the state will be watchin’ for me.”
I understood what he was saying, but the meaning behind the words got lost as I started to shiver. I couldn’t remember ever feeling so horrible in my entire life, including when I’d gotten the measles in sixth grade. Every inch of my body hurt, from the soles of my feet to the top of my head. I felt like I was dying, which actually seemed like it would be a relief.
“Vera,” Charlie said quietly, sitting down next to me on the bed. “You awake, baby?”
I couldn’t even summon any irritation at the pet name.
“Yes,” I murmured. Even forming the words hurt.
“I’ve got a brother coming up to meet us,” he said gently. “We’ll put the bike in the back of the truck and ride in the cab from here on out.”
“Just stay here,” I said, already falling asleep again. “I’m tired.”
“We can’t stay here,” he replied, smoothing his hand lightly over my hair. “Don’t worry, I’ve got everything handled.”
The next time I woke up the blankets around me were being pulled away.
“Stop it,” I ordered, reaching blindly for the bedding. I was still freezing my ass off and the chills made my body ache even worse.
“Gotta check you out,” a strange voice said, startling me fully awake.
I would have screamed if Charlie’s face hadn’t been the first thing I saw when I opened my eyes.
“This is Doc,” Charlie said. “Let him look you over.”
“I’m fine,” I argued, trying to scoot away.
“You’ve been out for sixteen hours,” Charlie replied. “You aren’t fine.”
“Are you even a real doctor?” I asked incredulously as I stared at the man reaching for my leg. He looked like he belonged in a prison, not working at a hospital.
