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"I might stay for the week if that's not too much trouble on you and Izzie." I need a break from my life, and I need to work out how I can fit into Connor’s.
"Of course it's not. It's nice to have you home, stay as long as you need to." She smiles, and I notice her eyes are a little teary.
"Amelia is going to organize for us to meet and spend some time getting to know each other."
"That sounds like a good start. Do you know anything about the boy?"
"Nope, just that he looks like me at the same age. That's it. I have missed so much," I say sadly, already feeling like I have let him down.
"Oh, honey." She rubs my arm. "You will make up for that time, Heath. Be there for him now. You can't control what happened in the past, only how you choose to spend your future. Focus on that."
I glance at her, not knowing if I should ask her the burning question that's been taking up residence in my mind since I found out. "What if I can't handle it? What if I'm a shit dad like mine?"
"The fact you're even worried about it means you're a better dad than him already. Being a good parent doesn't mean you know everything. You learn as you go, and the most important thing is being there for them when they need you. If you're present in his life, I know you will be the best dad for him."
I'm glad she thinks that, because ever since I told Amelia I'm going to be a part of his life, I have been freaking the fuck out that I don't know what to do. I know nothing about kids. All I know is I don't want to be like my dad.
CHAPTER SEVEN
AMELIA
"AHeathRileyison line one for you," Summer calls through my intercom, breaking my concentration on the design I'm trying to finish. A nervous flutter goes through me. I only saw him yesterday, and we left it by saying I would contact him with my schedule for the week so we could plan a dinner. So a call to my office at not even ten in the morning is unexpected.
"Thanks," I say, pressing one to take the call. "Hello,” I answer with more pep than I actually feel after another sleepless night.
"Millie, you haven't texted me your number," he says, more anxious than annoyed with me for not doing it.
"How did you find where I worked?" I ask, more intrigued. And happy to be talking to him again.
"Della looked you up," he says sheepishly.
"Oh." Della, of course she did. Why do I already dislike this woman so much?
"When you said you ran a business, I didn't realize you were one of the most popular fashion designers on the west coast. You’ve made quite a name for yourself. I'm so proud of you," he says so fondly it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. I don't know why his opinion matters to me so much, but it does.
My heart flutters in a way it shouldn't when I need to keep this platonic, but maybe I threw any chance of that out the window when we fucked at the reunion. "Thank you," is all I can say in response. "Did you call me just to tell me that?"
"No, I realized last night that if I'm going to come around to meet Connor, I think I need to know a little about him first. Like, what's he into?" I can hear the trepidation in his tone, like he's worried, but he doesn't need to be.
"You can ask him all of that when you come over." I smile through the phone, thrilled he actually cares.
"Millie, help me. I have no idea about all this stuff, and it's unnerving. I feel like I should know something about him. What if I have nothing to talk to him about?"
"Okay, well, he loves to read, comics are his favorite, and he loves sports and game consoles. Pretty much you think of what a nine-year-old boy would be into and that's him."
I hear pencil on paper. "Okay, that's a start."
"Are you writing this down?" I stifle a laugh. It's not really funny, but it's so cute.
"Just so I don't forget. I want to be prepared," he tells me all serious.
"Truthfully Connor is the least of your worries. He mostly keeps to himself. If you're coming for a meal at our place, it's my daughter Ruby you should be worried about."
"Why, what's wrong with her?" he asks, sounding even more stressed.
"Nothing is wrong with her, she's just a sassy seven-year-old who thinks the world revolves around her. She will have questions for you and talk your ear off. We don't have visitors over very often other than family, so she'll be excited to have someone new to quiz."
"Noted." He laughs, sounding more relaxed. "What's she into then, so I have something to talk to her about."
