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"That's a good idea. I'll pop my head in and say hi to them, then why don't we go sit out back with our treats and you can tell me all about it."
I fill her in on everything that happened yesterday—Elara coming to my office and then my conversation with Heath before and after the viral video. Jasmine said she was sent the video by her best friend and her partner at work, Maeve. That's the worst part, everyone knows. And the ones who aren’t on social media would have seen it this morning in one of the media outlets—everyone who is anyone knows about it. I know that for a fact because I have already had a call or message from every single person in my family, including my parents, who I wouldn't think were very up to date with the latest celebrity gossip. It's humiliating. In this town I'm literally going to be forever known as the girl who gets cheated on and left for a younger, prettier woman. Whether it's true or not.
Jasmine takes my hand, giving it a squeeze. "I'm so sorry this is happening to you, Amelia. It's not fair."
"Life’s not fair sometimes, Jas, it's just the way it is," I say, defeated. Since Paris, I let myself believe this was my happily ever after because I wanted it so badly, but maybe that blinded me. Now I can't tell if I'm naïve or stupid for ever believing I could have it all because clearly that's impossible. And with every little blow I have taken lately, it's weakened me further. Last night was the final straw. I can’t deal with it anymore.
"But to have this happen again, it's..."
"Fucking awful. I know. I can't even process it properly. When Declan cheated on me and left me, I was heartbroken, but part of me knew it was coming, so there wasn't the surprise. I always knew he was a womanizing asshole, and it was only a matter of time. But Heath, he's not like that. When we're together, he makes me feel like he adores me and I am the only girl in the world. And he saw the video at the same time as me, Jas, he looked shocked as shit. It could have been the guilt from being caught out, but I don't think it was."
"Guilty or not, you have to go through the media circus."
"Exactly. What a nightmare. I can't deal with all eyes on me thinking I'm a fool for falling for a rock star. The story is on every front page, it was even the top news story on the morning news. How is this shit news to anyone but me, him, and the whore who is saying he knocked her up?" I didn't fall in love with him because he was a rock star. I fell in love with a sweet boy who worshipped me, and he is still in there, but he’s had to adapt to survive in this crazy world of mega fame, and I’m not sure I know how.
She rubs my shoulder, trying to comfort me. I'm not even crying like I normally would be. Maybe I used up my lifetime allowance of tears over all this already and now I'm just going to be angry and bitter for the rest of my life. "I know, honey, you’re one hundred percent right, but unfortunately it's not how today's world works when you’re mega famous like he is."
"Even if he didn't do this, how can I ever be with him knowing stuff like this could come up at any time? How many secret babies do you think he can father before the media fuck off and leave him alone? I'm not strong enough to handle it."
Her eyes are watery, and she wipes the tears away. "I'm sorry, pregnancy hormones, they’re making me super empathetic this week." She snuffles, and I go inside to get her some tissues, shoving the box in her direction.
“How are you doing your job this week?” I ask.
“Not very well apparently.” She cries even more, trying to dab away the tears and clean up her face with the tissue. “Maybe you need to talk to Mom about this. She lived a very similar scenario when Dad was producing movies. I remember overhearing something about that being why he got out of the business in the end. It was all too much with little kids, Mom couldn't handle it. And they wanted a normal life."
"Heath could never live a normal life, he loves performing too much. I wouldn't ask him to give it up for me."
She gives me a look; it's a little judgy, like she knows better now that she's in love. "That might be so, but some things are more important. There was a time Axel didn't want to have any more kids and look at me right now." She pats her little bump proudly. "People change and so do their priorities. If he loves you like he says, maybe he would."
"I would never let him, Jasmine. Not for me," I tell her with absolute certainty. It's why I let him go in the first place all those years ago. I loved him back then, of course I did, I loved him so much that I wanted to see him live out his dreams. It made me so happy to watch his journey. Yes, my heart hurt every time I thought about what I was missing in my life, but my decision back then wasn't about me. He was destined to be the rock god he is, and I'm glad he got to do it.
"What about for Connor?" She gives me a knowing look, and she’s right. For his son, I want him around more than anything, but he deserves his life as well. Even if we can’t make it through this, he will still be in Connor’s life. I would never stop him from seeing him. It will just be a little more complicated.
The doorbell rings, causing me to nearly jump out of my skin. I glance at Jasmine, and she shrugs. “Can you go check it, please, Jas? I can't face people today."
"Sure," she says, a little wary.
I finish the last bite of my pastry and wash it down with a gulp of my now-cold coffee.
"Well, that was crazy," comes Summer's bubbly voice, filling the house. I look over my shoulder to see her breezing through the open back doors, like we're not going through some new crisis. "I didn't think I would be fighting off cameras and paparazzi just trying to see my boss." She laughs awkwardly as she takes me in. I must really be a sight to the both of them. No makeup, a baggy sweatshirt, and black workout tights. In all the years I have known Summer, she wouldn't have ever seen me like this. But it was all I had the strength for today.
I stand to greet her, and she approaches me with her arms wide, wrapping them around me in a tight hug. "What the fuck is going on? This is crazy."
"This is my sister Jasmine, she brought coffee and treats."
"She must know you well." Summer smiles to her.
"I'm sorry I left you to deal with it on your own at the office, I just couldn't face it all today."
We all take a seat on the patio. Summer pulls the damn clipboard from under her arm, glancing over it. "It's fine. Georgie's learning fast. I have left her in charge while I'm out, and you know I'm tough. I have been doing this with you long enough. I reckon I could deal with just about anything. It's you I'm worried about." She looks me over like I'm a lost puppy who needs to find her way back home.
"As long as you have that." I point to the clipboard, trying to make a joke.
"Don't knock it. Your whole life is organized on this thing." She smiles, knowing how she looks, but not caring. It's one of the things that made me hire her in the first place, her general lack of concern for what other people think about her. She's her own person, strong and independent. She's taught me a lot over the years.
"You know you can get digital organizers these days," Jasmine offers.
Summer shrugs. "I'm old-fashioned. This is what works for me."
