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Assuming we had the capacity to laugh at all with Gabe here.
“Ow!” I said as I pulled the paper off the roll. I looked down at my hand and saw a thin red line where I’d managed to slice my finger. “Damn it.”
“What’s wrong?” Lexi asked, and I held up my finger. “Oh, a papercut? Ouch.”
“Not nearly as painful as having to interact withhimfor Christmas,” I grumbled.
“Okay,” Lexi said in a voice that was half scolding, half reassuring. “I get it. The guy rubbed you the wrong way. But you’re giving his attitude all the power over you by letting it irritate you this much. If you have a bad Christmas, that’s on you, Jen. Not him. He can blow all the hot air he wants to, but he can only make you feel a certain way if you let him.”
I turned to grab my hot chocolate and leaned against the dresser, sipping it. The rum tickled the back of my throat, and I took a bigger swig, wanting more of its numbing effect.
“I know you’re right, Lex,” I said, “but it wouldn’t be so bad if it wasn’t Christmas. Having to ignore someone onChristmasbecause they won’t shut up and be a kind, decent person should be illegal.”
Lexi’s phone buzzed and she scrambled for it. I pretended not to notice but tried to get a peek at the screen. Unfortunately, she was too far away to see any kind of picture or name.
I continued with my wrapping as Lexi’s fingers clicked across the digital keyboard and when she sent it, she sighed.
“You know what I was just thinking about?” Lexi said wistfully. “My favorite memory of Christmas—before all the kids of course. I was six years old, and I wanted the Barbie that came with a horse to ride so badly that I would literally dream about it.”
In my head, I tried to picture little Lexi, sleeping in her bed and dreaming of the iconic blonde. The idea of it was adorable.
“My parents had told me and Jake that we wouldn’t be getting much for Christmas that year because they were planning a trip to Disneyland for us, and we had to save for it. But I woke up on Christmas morning and there she was,withthe separate stable and accessories,andmy parents had signed me up for horse riding camp in the summer. It really was Christmas magic.”
It sounded lovely, and my mental image of a young Lexi continued. I saw her naturally light blonde hair bouncing as she opened her gift, saw a child version of Lexi’s beautiful smile as she pulled the Barbie and plastic horse free from the wrapping paper. I could imagine being little, getting that gift and losing my mind. I thought back to my favorite Christmas memory, trying to drag up just one that I loved best.
“I think my favorite memory is when my dad took us sledding on the big hill near our house.” I could picture that day as clear as if it were yesterday. I was wearing hot pink snow pants, and Dean wore bright orange ones. “The hill was almost always jam-packed so it was hard to get some good sledding in. But on Christmas morning, Dad woke us up early and drove us over to see the perfectly unblemished snow. Not a single footprint and no one in sight. We sledded for hours until our noses were frozen, and then we went home to drink hot chocolate and open presents.”
Lexi was awed at my story, and I felt a small well of emotion come over me. I missed my parents so much, especially when I did nostalgic things like come to the cabin with Dean.
I quickly grabbed another present and paper to keep me from breaking down, but Lexi sensed my sadness and leaned over to hug me. “Hopefully this Christmas can even top that one,” she said with forced cheerfulness.
I nodded but knew there was no way. Especially not with Gabe, the biggest fun suck I’d ever encountered. I’d have to get past it if I wanted to have any fun at all—I knew that. But right now, in this sentimental moment, it felt like nothing could be further from possible.
“I guess we’ll see,” I said. I turned back to my suitcase and opened it to see one of Lexi’s presents, a Fenty makeup palette, sitting right on top. I closed it quickly and turned back to her.
“What?” she said, putting a bow on another immaculately wrapped present.
“Nothing,” I said with a grin. “Just… wrap the next gift with your back to me.”
“Oh, it’s like that?” She laughed, tossing a bow at me. “Well, at least make sure you get a bow to cover up wherever you miss.”
“If that’s what you want,” I said, grabbing for the gift to start measuring paper, “you might need more than one.”
Chapter Four
Gabe
“Goodluck,”Deansaidwith a dry laugh at me. “If I know my sister at all, I know that it’s nearly impossible to change her mind once she’s made it up.”
“Well, if I don’t at least try, I may as well just sign the death warrant on this Christmas,” I said as I put the last of my clothes away. “If making the place feel ‘homey’ would help everyone feel more at ease, I’d like to participate.”
“Alright,” he said with a sigh, closing up his suitcase and putting it under the bed. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you, though. I wouldn’t be surprised if she burns whatever you try to put out.”
I stuck my suitcase under the bed next to Dean’s and followed him out of the room, walking past the closed doors of the girls’ rooms. I could hear voices coming from within, but I didn’t care to eavesdrop. It was either not my business because it had nothing to do with me, or it had everything to do with me, in which case, it was none of my business. I didn’t have a burning desire to hear people talking about me in a less than savory way. I was good enough at imagining the kinds of things they could say without help.
Dean led me into the dining room, where, on the opposite side of the table, a large credenza stood in the middle of one of the log walls. He opened the doors to reveal a large collection of tablecloths, napkins, candles, and other types of décor. He started pulling things out to hand them to me, and within seconds, I was in danger of dropping the entire stack. One of the glass snowmen toppled from the top, and Dean managed to catch it right before it shattered on the floor.
“Little clumsy there?” he asked with an antagonistic grin.
