AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I don’t think it’s even sank in fully that my mom has gone. The idea that I’ll never see her or speak to her again feels completely unreal. Maybe that sensation would be normal, but after everything that’s happened since she died, I have no way of knowing for sure, or if I’m just in a state of shock. I probably am. I’m sure I read somewhere that it’s never a good idea to make any drastic life changes or decisions during the months after a bereavement, because you’re not in the right frame of mind to make any important choices, but here I am, lost in the wildness with three men who were effectively strangers until a few days ago. I can’t trust my reactions to them, or my emotions for them, or the thoughts I have about them. In a way, I find that a comfort. It gives me a kind of out—an excuse for thinking or doing or reacting in a way I might not feel completely comfortable with. It means the reason I keep remembering how big and hard Reed’s cock was against my back, and the reason I’m picturing how long and thick it must be, is simply because I’m grieving and in shock.NormalLaney would never think such a thing.
Reed gets to his feet and brushes down the front of his jeans. “I’m going to try to find a water source. We’re going to need to figure out something to eat, too. These supplies won’t last.”
“I saw some berry bushes on our way here,” I tell him. “I’m pretty sure they were blueberries. We could try foraging.”
“Do you know the difference between edible berries and ones that are poisonous?”
I twist my lips. “Honestly, I’m not sure, but I think I know a blueberry when I see one. They’re my favorite.”
They were what I treated myself to whenever I’d come across some spare cash. A whole tub of fresh blueberries that I’d sit and eat by myself, popping one after the other into my mouth. I never took them back to the trailer to share because Mom would berate me for wasting money—money she could have spent on booze. A wave of guilt passes through me about that. I should have shared with her.
“I’ll keep an eye out when I go farther to try to find a water source.” He eyes me for a moment. “You going to be okay here?”
I wonder if I should offer to come with him, but then I remember waking up in bed with his erection pressed into me and decide not to.
“Of course, I’ll be fine.”
Chapter Fifteen
Darius
THE SOUNDS OF THE FORESTare beautiful.
I’ve lost count of the number of different bird songs I’ve heard. I don’t even mind the buzzing of insects around me, though I slap at my skin when a mosquito tickles. The breeze in the canopy of branches shushes like ocean waves on the shore.
I feel better now we’ve found somewhere to settle.
The hike through the forest had not been a good experience for me. I’d lost count of the number of times I’d almost tripped or had been struck in the face by a low hanging branch. I’d never concentrated so hard in my life, putting everything into focusing on Cade’s movement. Occasionally, I’d been forced to put my hand on his shoulder to allow him to guide me, but I’d hated doing it. With every stumble and bump, my anger had grown, but I’d buried it inside me. If I lost my temper, I worried I wouldn’t be able to rein it back in again. I pictured myself tearing at the trees and roaring at a sky I couldn’t even see.
Perhaps I should be more grateful that we’re even alive. The pilots and flight attendant weren’t so lucky.
I might not be able to see them, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t noticed the tension Laney’s presence has caused. Is it because she’s off limits? Reed says she’s our stepsister, but how the hell are any of us supposed to think of her like that? She’s a stranger.
Well, we’re all going to get to know each other a hell of a lot better now.
At least sitting here, on the porch, it is peaceful. I can’t remember another time when I couldn’t hear the constant hum of traffic or of sirens going off or even planes flying overhead. I can picture in my mind the porch I’m sitting on and the cabin at my back and even the apparently never-ending forest surrounding us. It’s one thing I imagine would be different for someone who’d been blind since birth—how would they be able to picture such things? I’m grateful to be able to remember the color of the sky and what trees look like.
Are we ever going to be found?
My fingers itch to create music. I’m sure the others will ask me to play at some point, but I won’t. The next time I play will be when we’re back in civilization, safe again. If I play before then, it’ll mean I’ve given up, that I’ve accepted this is our new normal and we have to live like this—like mountain men.
The sunlight shining through the trees is creating a strange stripey shadowed effect across what little remains of my vision. I have no ability to see depth, but I can see the contrast of light and shadows.
I hate my impaired vision here. I’m in completely unmapped territory. I don’t want to be reliant on anyone, but how can I know where anything is out here? A fallen tree or boulder threatens to trip me. A tree trunk is just waiting for me to smack straight into.
One thing I hate more than anything is looking foolish. I don’t want to be that person, stumbling around, their hands held out in front of them. I like to be calm, cool, controlled.
It’s not going to be easy if we end up having to spend any longer than a couple of days here.
Things will be even harder when the only woman around is also out of bounds. I don’t know how long we’ll be here, but I can sense frustration already mounting—and I’m including myself in that. Will Laney be safe with us all? I’d like to think we’recivilized people who can control ourselves, but what if we’ve had civilization stripped from us? What then? And as the nights grow longer and colder, will we be looking for other ways to keep ourselves warm?
I wonder what Laney thinks when she looks at us. Does she see us as strangers, or family?
“Hi.”
Speak of the devil.
“Hey, Laney. I don’t think it’s your turn yet.”
