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“Oh, yeah?”
“It’s kind of like what you said about making the person you’re with feel good, but it goes beyond that. You don’t just want to give them an orgasm—though you definitely want that too—it’s this …rightness. When you’re inside them and your head is swimming with how good everything is and your chest feels like it’s going to explode under the force of all those emotions.”
“Huh. I hope I get to experience that one day.”
“I hope you get to too.”
It seems almost impossible that I had that and lost it, but then Ford’s kiss lightly touches my jaw, and I let the thought go. My eyes fall closed, and I remind myself I’m with him and I shouldn’t feel guilty for that. I shouldn’t feel guilty for wanting to be here. For wanting more. And not just when it comes to sex.
I want that feeling back. To fall in love. And I have a sneaking suspicion that I’ve taken a step in the right direction.
Ford’s hand sneaks down over my inner thigh, dangerously close to my cock. I tense, wanting him to go lower, tempted to rock my hips up to give him a hint.
“Feel good?”
I reach down to cup myself, making sure Ford can see how hard I am. “I’m a fan.”
The sound he lets out as he turns his face into my hair is pure happiness. His lips find that spot behind my ear, and I immediately arch my head to the side, giving him free range. His beard scratches my skin, but his warm lips are soft, and the warring sensations send ripples over my body. My sense of touch is heightened, and every kiss along my neck and shoulder draws my skin tighter around me. Like I’m being coiled, ready to let go.
I reach behind me, grip his sides, and trail my hands down to his hips, where my thumbs sneak under his waistband.
“I really want these off now,” I say.
He groans. “Tell me what to do and I’ll do it.”
“Off. Take them off.” I jump up and struggle out of my pants, turning to find Ford doing the same. He kicks out of them, hard dick jutting out the front of his underwear, and mine is doing the same.
Right. I’m doing this.
I walk over and straddle his waist. His body is like a solid wall of heat, and our erections are both straining the thin cotton of our underwear, tempting me to move closer, to press them together.
“Now, this is familiar,” he says.
“Uh-huh.” I swallow, staring at his lips, heart pounding loudly in my ears. “I want to kiss you.”
“Whenever you’re ready.”
I kinda wish he’d taken over, but this is better. This gives me a chance to prove it’s what I want. And it is. Even if I’m nervous. Even if this feels like too many big steps.
I’m scared, but I’m doing it anyway.
Because I want him, and I want to get past this so I can prove it to him.
I lean in, skimming my lips against his before I seal our mouths together. The kiss is world-spinningly good, like the one earlier, and I moan as I open my mouth and lick at his lips. Ford’s hand dives into my hair as his mouth parts, and his tongue surges forward. It tangles with mine, hot, wet, tasting like him. And even with me in control, he dominates the kiss. My toes curl over when he crushes my body against his, kissing me like he’s starving for it.
“As much as this position is a favorite of mine, I’d fucking love to feel you under me.”
“Yes.”
His eyebrows furrow. “You sure?”
“I’ll tell you if I’m not.”
“Good. If I do anything you’re not comfortable with, tell me right away.”
“Of course.” And I don’t even doubt that I’d be able to because Ford makes everything easy.
He holds me tight as he turns to lay me across the couch before blanketing his body over mine. The sight of him looming above, eyes dark and expression taken over by want, washes nerves over me again.
