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"Well, pardon me for not sharing your optimism, but the last time I went, I got some souvenirs." He pointed to his chest and bicep, which was still bandaged. "Plus, I lost people that I shouldn't have, so..."
"You're a coward." I said with amusement in my eyes.
"What the fuck did you just call me?" he growled.
"You're a... uhhh, what's the Italian for this...Pussy... ah. Yeah. You're a pussieah!" I slurred, doing my best to imitate the Italian accent.
"You really want to see me 'not be a coward'?" He eyed me with dark intent.
"Woah! Calm down, biggie! There's no need to get aggressive. We're not in the same weight class." I pushed at his thighs, almost instantly withdrawing the contact. Those were the sexiest things I had touched this year. Instantly recoiling to our little tiff, I continued, "What I meant to say, was that I lost a father that night and look at me. I've moved on." I felt so wise saying what I said.
"Now, unless you've lost someone equally as important in which you should be on the same high as I am now, you shouldn't be here moping. You should be out in the field, looking for fresh pussy to bring to this luxurious man cave. You seem like the type that can handle a four-woman orgy," I rambled.
He looked at me with something familiar I couldn't place. "You came in here a few minutes past one a.m. It's a miracle you still have your personal belongings on you. Now let me ask you this. Do you think that is by far the most reasonable thing to do, as a young woman? Do you think it's even safe? Let's start there!"
"Listen," I answered with more composure now that I was seated. "I have been doing this before you came into my life...or...I came into yours...not the point. I've been doing this before you. I'll probably do it when we go our separate ways. Nothing has happened to me thus far. I think it's unlikely that something would."
"Sienna! They molest and harass fully sober girls...and guys at this time! A girl in your condition would be too easy a target!"
"I'm like...this tall though." I held my hands up and flattened my palm to indicate a certain height.
"It's only a matter of time. All it takes is the interest of someone to perk up. Haven't you even thought about me? There are two times I could have taken full advantage of you. Today makes it three. You are one lucky motherfucker," he said pointedly.
"You sound like someone I know." I guessed. I sensed the familiarity, but still hadn't been able to put my finger on it.
"Yeah. Your father would definitely want you safe, Sienna. Think about him when you decide to be stupid," he spat.
I did think of it. That was what I had been trying to push down… away. Alessandro just brought it out and threw it at me. He seemed to have noticed how much that touched me because the silence in the ear was deafening.
"I'm sorry."
"It's fine."
"No, really... that was insensitive of me, I shouldn't have..."
"I said it's fine!" Fresh tears stung the sides of my eyes, and I didn't hold them back. I lacked too much control in the present moment.
"You're right," I said solemnly. "I failed him." My voice broke. He perched on the couch right next to me and pushed my head onto his shoulder. I shuffled to get more comfortable.
"You think you'll need a bucket?" he offered.
"I'm not that far gone really," I said, trying to keep my voice strong.
"You know you don't have to do that," he said and continued when I didn't answer. "You don't have to hold back to prove you're strong. Strong people cry the most, you know, cause they endure the most pain. Let it go, Sienna. Clean your system of the sadness you feel."
With that being said, I sank down into his stomach and buried my face in his warm firm muscle, and let the tears ooze out. It was silent, but Alessandro knew I was crying. He must have been feeling the wetness of my tears on his fabric. He rubbed my back lightly as I hiccupped shortly before falling asleep on him.
Chapter 7
My hair was a mess. In fact, my entire body was a mess. I hadn't done much taking care of myself lately. Standing in front of the mirror naked was starting to be more of a daily ritual now. My pounding head from the hangover momentarily blurred my vision and made it a little difficult to focus my eyes, but once I got the hang of it, I gave myself a long stare. Horrible was the sight that stared back.
I shook my head and looked away.
“I’d be better after a shower,”I told myself and got right to it. This time, I scrubbed hard. My neck, armpits, down there...
I genuinely left no stone unturned in this shower and felt completely new when I was rinsing my body for the third time. Stepping out of the shower, I revisited the mirror.
Definitely looked much better.
