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But Kim’s reaction is not one of pleasure. The look of horror grows on her face, and when she turns to me in shock, I decide that this was a bad call. I click the vid off, grimacing. “I am sorry, Kim. I did not realize that would be unpleasant for you.”
“You liked it? He—he attacked everyone in the stands!”
“He did,” I agree. “It must have felt good. I have been in his place many times before and wanted to attack those that get pleasure out of watching two males fight for their lives.”
Her expression softens a bit. “I guess that would be awful. But…aren’t we just as bad, watching the videos?”
“I do not know,” I answer honestly. “I cannot say yes or no because most of my life has been involved in the arena in some fashion. I watch a great many fights to appreciate the prowess of the fighters, and to learn their moves. Those that watch in the stands are there for the blood, and they bet upon who will win. I do not care if they die.”
She makes a soft noise in her throat. “In other words, it’s complicated.”
“Like everything else,” I agree.
“Okay,” she breathes and then gives me a firm nod. “I’m going to tell myself they’re all bad guys and not let it bother me too much. It’s just…very different. Even now, when I think I’ve seen the depths of depravity that the universe can offer, I’m always surprised again.”
She thinks she has seen all the evils this galaxy has to offer? My innocent, sweet Kim? I hope I must never prove her wrong. I want to protect her innocence and optimism always. “We should probably go to bed. It is late and you have training in the morning.”
“Right.” Kim looks thoughtful.
I reach over and pat her hand. “Do not worry. I am not asking to sleep with you. I will sleep in my workout room.”
“Right. Of course.” Kim offers me a halfhearted smile and gets to her feet. “Pleasant dreams, then. I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Until then.”
Perhaps it is just my imagination, but it seemed as if Kim did not wish to sleep alone. I go to my hard, lonely bed, pleased. It will not be my lonely bed for long.
54
NASSAKTH
Things are falling into an easier pattern between myself and Kim, but there is still too much distance between us. She sleeps alone at night, she showers alone, and she works on her book in the afternoons. This is far too much time away from me, and I am a selfish sort of mate, so I look for ways to insert myself into her day.
I finish a brisk workout one afternoon and hunt for Kim, only to find her pursing her lips and glaring at the datapad’s tiny screen. “What are you doing?”
She looks over at me and her face goes crimson. “Nothing.”
Mmm. If it is nothing, it is an odd reason to turn so red. Curious. “You are writing in your story, yes?”
She relaxes a bit, her hand going over the screen. “Yes. I’m just trying to figure out this next scene.”
“One that makes you unhappy? You were frowning.”
Her face turns red again.
My ears prick. “You have never told me what this book is about.”
“Haven’t I?” she asks lightly, closing away the file and tossing the datapad aside oh-so casually. “I’m pretty sure I have. I told you, it’s a romance.”
“It is about a male and a female that mate, yes?”
“Marry,” she says in a huffy voice. “They marry.”
“Will you read it to me? What you are working on?” I move to pick up the datapad, intending to offer it to her.
To my surprise, Kim snatches it out of my hand. “No! It’s private.”
“But you said you post it for other human women to read—”
“That’s different!”
She is acting very suspicious. “How is it different?”
“It just is!”
“You will not share it with me?” I narrow my eyes at her. She looks distinctly uncomfortable, the awkward expression on her face similar to the first time she fought with me in the war room, naked. Something about this is making her shy. “I can have the system read it aloud if you are uncomfortable—”
“No!” she yelps, clutching the pad to her chest. “Nassakth, NO.” Her face is bright pink as she holds it away from me. “It’s a love scene, all right? I’m writing a love scene.”
“You write out…how they pleasure each other?”
“Maybe,” she grumbles.
This is fascinating to me. “Do you…write of how I pleasure you with my tongue?”
My Kim hisses at me like an angry praxiian dam. “It’s fiction. It’s not about you.”
“Do I inspire you?” I ask hopefully, and when she turns pink, I am pleased. “Do you need more inspiration?”
“Not right now, no.” She glares at me ferociously. “You—”
My communicator chirps with an incoming call. I groan, wagging a finger at Kim. “We will continue this fascinating conversation momentarily.” And I plan on using it as a way to get her to open up to me once more. I saunter over to the vid-panel in the wall and see Bethiah’s name pop up.
