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“Good. I got your ticket this morning as well.”
“I could have gotten my own ticket.”
He looked at me with a sardonic smile. “You wouldn’t have gotten it if I told you I wanted you to leave. I had to make you promise to be there for Cassie so I could guarantee your safety.”
I didn’t know why, but that made me angry. “I don’t need you to guarantee shit for me, Lucas! I told you I can take care of myself!” I yelled. “I could have stayed with you. Cass will have Momma and Pop. But what about you? You’re going to be up in those mountains alone. You need me! How will you sleep? Hell, what will you eat?” I put my head in my hands, deflated. “Why are you making me leave you?”
He pulled me into his arms and hugged me. The tears fell, but I wiped them quickly. I didn’t want him to worry about me when he already had so much on his shoulders. “Baby, it’s necessary. I want… no, Ineedyou safe. Knowing you’re on that plane will be worth any nightmare I have while you’re gone. And when it’s all said and done, you can bitch to me about how I made you promise to leave without you knowing.”
He pulled back and took my face between his hands, then kissed the lone tear that rolled down my cheek. “Don’t cry. I’ll be fine. You’ll be fine. My family will be fine. It’ll all work out. I have a feeling.”
I chuckled humorlessly. “A feeling, huh?”
“Yeah. Whatever higher power there is wouldn’t take me away from the man I fell in love with.”
My breath caught in my chest. But before I could say anything, Cass ambled into the room with an overnight bag. She took in the scene—me crying, sitting close to Lucas, and his hands framing my face, which he hadn’t moved. She looked over her shoulder, checking for her parents, then whispered, “I want to know everything about how this happened, but I’ll wait ’til we get back. Lucas, lower your hands. Momma is coming, and she’ll hold you hostage until she gets answers.”
We both knew she was right and chuckled before we scooted apart. No sooner than we got our distance did Momma and Pop come in the room. Momma had tears running down her cheeks but had her head held high. She came and stood in front of Lucas. “Give me a hug, son. We’re only going to be gone for two weeks.” He rose and gave her a tight hug. “No matter who is after you, we’re coming back for you. Do you understand? We’re strong too. We can protect each other.”
Lucas nodded but didn’t speak. He swallowed loudly, letting me know he was trying to fight back his tears. Pop came over and gave him a tight bear hug, seeming like he didn’t want to let him go. Cass was next, lying her head on his chest and leaving wet spots on his shirt from her tear-stained cheeks. He kissed the top of her head and squeezed her tight.
“Okay,” he said roughly. “Y’all have to get going. Don’t want you to miss your flight.”
They ambled out the door, looking at him over their shoulders. I headed out with them and had to fight to put one foot in front of the other. He looked so broken, standing in the middle of the room. “You comin’?” I asked.
“I have a key. I’ll lock up when you guys are on the road.”
I nodded, hating that he would be by himself. I wanted to shout at him, tell him to come with us. To protect himself by leaving town, not by some sense of duty to his team. It was admirable, but his family needed him.Ineeded him. I wanted to tell him I loved him too, that I wanted to say fuck the boundaries I put down, and we can be more. That I knew I had more healing to do but he helped me and made me better. Or that I would wait for him until we were both healed and come together then.
But I didn’t want to give him anything else to worry about. I didn’t want to distract him from keeping himself safe. So I held onto the fact that he loved me too. I held onto the fact that he was expecting everything to be okay, and he was expecting to come back… to me.
I got one of my suitcases from my car and transferred it to Pop’s SUV, then hopped in the backseat beside Cass, who was now crying in earnest. I put my arms around her, and she collapsed into them, holding on tightly. When Pop looped around the fountain toward the front door, Lucas was standing on the porch. He looked sad but resolute. Strong, like he knew he was doing the right thing. And he was, but hopefully not at the expense of his life.
Chapter17
Lucas
Watching my family and the man I loved drive away was probably one of the hardest things I’d ever had to do. Everyone I loved in one car, leaving me, but it was necessary. They had to go.
I pushed down the tears and used the same key I’d had for over twenty years to lock the door to my parents’ house. I didn’t linger because I wanted to pretend I would be back, and my leaving now was like any other time I left through the front door—I expected to return.
I pulled out of the driveway, silence blanketing me like a shroud. I hated it. I wanted to call Tristan and hear his voice and his reassurances, but I knew I couldn’t. Not while he was in the car with Momma and Pop. Cassie knew something was going on between us now, but she didn’t know the true extent—I was in love with him, and I wanted him to be my forever.
I blew out a breath, frustrated that this case was taking everything from me. It wasn’t enough to take my mental health. It was taking my sleep, my family, and now my love. I was on a mission. I was going to put this fucker in the ground any way I could. I wouldn’t let him get away with not only taking lives but ruining mine in the process. First, the girls he and Bush murdered, then Green and Mills. And my team was threatened. He wasn’t going to be breathing long. I didn’t know how I would ensure that, but I would do everything in my power to make sure it was true.
I was about an hour from the cabin when my Bureau-issued phone rang. I thought it was Billings, but it wasn’t her name that appeared. It was SSA Green’s. That sent a chill down my spine, so much so that I was reluctant to answer. Then I realized I only had Green’s office number, so this must be the Interim Director. I answered the call and put it on speaker.
“Agent Blackwell.”
“Blackwell, you’ll have to forgive me, but I don’t have time for pleasantries. This is SSA Santana. Are you somewhere safe?”
I sat up in my seat. “I’m heading back to—”
“Don’t tell me. I don’t need the information. I only need to know that you’ll be somewhere you can’t easily be found. I have bad news.” He took a deep breath, and I was filled with dread. “Billings was savagely attacked last night. Her left hand and foot were mutilated, and she was stabbed in the right side of her chest. Luckily for her, her neighbors thought all her lights being on was suspicious since she’s either asleep close to midnight or at work. They called the cops, and the attacker ran when they heard the sirens. She’s alive, but barely. She’s been placed in a medically induced coma until her body can heal itself. It’ll be touch and go for the next twenty-four hours. I’ll update you when I can. In the meantime, be vigilant. I don’t need to tell you this, but keep your head on a swivel. We haven’t met, but I’ve heard great things, and I want us to have a long working relationship.”
“Yes, sir. I’ll be careful. Is there anything I can do?”
“Not at present. All I ask is for you to be safe. I’ll call when I have more.”
