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“And? Do you think Dean’s going to mind working a little longer to get you off? Because I seriously doubt it.”
“Location matters,” I blurt out. “I can’t just do it anywhere. And I don’t know what positions will feel good, if any at all. What if…what if I can’t?” I finally voice my fear.What if I can’t give Dean an intimate, sexual relationship?
“Riley. I say this with nothing but love and open curiosity. I know you have your v-card, but you do realize there’s more to intimacy than just intercourse, right?” Mila asks gently.
My face turns bright red. “Well, yeah, but isn’t the main event kind of what most guys want?”
She shrugs. “I mean, maybe? But how will you know if you don’t talk about it with him instead of me? If a guy really cares about you, loves you, even, then shouldn’t he want to meet you at your level? It’s like me with not wanting kids. I’m not going to settle for a man who wants them, just like I would never expect a man who wants to have kids, to settle for me. True love, or at least a truly serious relationship, should include being on the same page about whatever is important for you. If sex doesn’t work for you, and Dean is really committed to being with you, then he’ll be willing to figure something out.”
I lift my wine glass to my lips and drain the last few sips as I consider what she’s said. I’ve never been close enough with a man to even need to start considering all of this. But Dean, well…
“Ri, at the end of the day, you can drive yourself crazy thinking about all the what-ifs and maybes with me, or you can just call your man, tell him you want to get freaky, and figure it out together.”
* * *
“Just tell him. That’s all you have to do. Dean, I wanna get freaky.”
“You what?”
“Jesus Christ!” I yelp, my body jumping in surprise at Dean’s voice. “What are you doing here already?”
He leans down and pecks a kiss to my lips. “Well, see, it’s my house. I live here. And apparently I came home just in time to hear you say some very interesting things to yourself.”
“Thanks, Mila,” I mutter to myself, wishing I could just roll myself into a hole and die of embarrassment.
“What does she have to do with it?” Dean asks as he walks up to his front door carrying a bag of groceries.
“Nothing,” I answer quickly, wheeling after him. “But really, what are you doing here? I thought you said you’d be gone a while.”
I follow him into the house, pushing the door closed behind me. He’s in the kitchen, unloading some fruit into the fridge.
“I thought so, too. But then you said you wanted to come over, and I wanted to see you, so I finished up faster than I expected.” He flashes me a dimpled grin. “Can we get back to what you were saying to yourself when I showed up?”
My teeth tug my lower lip in. “That depends on how much you heard.”
He casually saunters over to me, his thumbs hooked into the pockets of his worn jeans.
Don’t. Drool.
Easier said than done. Ever since a few days ago when I decided Mila was right and I just needed to go for it, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about, well, it. Getting Dean naked, seeing his body for the first time,feelinghis body for the first time.
I’m not completely inexperienced. I’ve given a guy a blowjob before. But it was short, and gross, because he didn’t give me any warning at all before shooting off in my mouth. The point is, I’ve seen a cock before. But I know. I justknowthat Dean will be different. Better.
Spinning a chair around backwards, he sinks down into it and crosses his arms over the back. His nearness is enough to already start getting me excited.
“Babe. Did you come here to tell me you wanna have sex with me?”
“Maybe,” I whisper, my eyes locked on his.
“It’s a yes or no question, Riley.”
My tongue darts out to moisten my lips. Dean’s eyes drop down to my mouth and darken.
“Yes.”
His lips tip up in a smile. “Good answer.” His mouth crushes mine, but then leaves it all too quickly as he stands up. “I’ve done some research in hopes that we’d get to this point. But I need you to promise me something.”
I think I’d promise this man anything right now, so I just nod.
