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“We’re going to Aunt Taylor’s cabin in Seattle. We went a few times when you were younger, but I don’t know if you remember.”
Ron sat up, and his entire face lit up. “Is that the place with the beach?”
“It is.” I flew the closet doors open and rummaged through it, pulling out clothes at random. “And you’ve got some time off of school, so we can stay there for a few days. What do you think?”
Ron crawled off the bed and threw his hands up in the air. “Can I pack my toys, mommy? How are we going to get there?”
“We’ll take the bus, sweetheart,” I replied without looking at him. “Don’t take too many of your toys, okay?”
Ron darted out of the room without responding.
I sighed and went through the rest of my clothes, throwing them all into a duffel bag without looking. Once I was done, I stepped into Ron’s room, saw the pile of clothes on his bed and the trail of toys on the floor, and shook my head. When his head poked out from behind the closet door, he gave me a sheepish smile.
“I’m sorry about the mess, mommy.”
I bent down to pick up a handful of his toys. “It’s okay. Let’s tidy this up together, okay? We want to hurry up and leave before there’s too much traffic.”
Ron nodded and emerged with a handful of shorts and t-shirts. “Mommy, is it going to be cold there?”
“It might be. Why don’t you put away your toys, and I’ll take care of your bag?”
Ron threw himself onto the floor, a look of fierce determination on his face. He looked so much like Bernard at that moment that it made tears well in the back of my eyes. I turned away from him and rubbed my eyes. Once the burning sensation went away, I cleared my throat and walked over to his closet.
In a daze, I selected a few of his clothes and set them down on the bed. While I folded and put away the rest, I tried not to think of Bernard or how he was going to feel when he didn’t find us.Considering I had no idea when he was going to be back from his business trip, I supposed it didn’t matter.
I was tired of sitting around and waiting for him to see reason.
And I didn’t want to be the kind of woman who put her life on hold for a man.
I would learn to be okay with him only being a part of Ron’s life.
I finished packing the rest of Ron’s things and held my hands out. He held out four of his toys; three action figures and a teddy bear. I gave him a smile as I set them down and zipped up the duffel bag. Once I was done, I gave it a firm pat and straightened my back.
“Okay, baby, why don’t we make sure all the windows are closed before we leave?”
“Why?”
“You don’t want a thief coming in and stealing our stuff, do you?”
Ron paused and shook his head. “No, mommy. That would be bad.”
He kept up a steady stream of conversation while we moved from one end of the apartment to the next, making sure everything was in order. As soon as we were done, I pulled out a piece of paper and a pen from my nightstand drawer and scribbled down my resignation. Then I addressed it to Bernard and folded the paper up. With one last glance around the apartment, I set the bags down by the door. Then I guided Ron out into the hallway, pausing to turn the key in the lock.
Ron waited for me in the hallway while I ducked into Bernard’s apartment.
It looked the same as when I left it earlier in the day, clean and spotless.
Exactly the same as it did when I first walked into it all those months ago.
Like we’d never been here to begin with.
Something hard settled in the pit of my stomach as I taped my note to the back of the door. Tears burned the back of my eyes as I looked around and ignored the hammering of my heart. Then I straightened my back and locked the door behind me. I sniffed as I placed my key into an envelope and pushed it underneath his door.
Ron gripped my hand tight as we took the elevator down.
Outside, the late afternoon sun was warm on our backs as we set off in the direction of the bus stop. On the bus, Ron sat close to me and clutched his action figure to his chest. At the bus station, I brought two tickets to Seattle before leading Ron to a row of benches.
While we sat down and waited, I cried into my coffee cup.
