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I look down, wondering what the hell I’ve done. But I’ve asked now. No going back, and at least he’s not heaving like an angry gorilla over my past anymore. “Your biological father,” I say. “I’ve never heard you or Esther talk about him.” Perhaps because they simply don’t talk about anything from their pasts.
He frowns, and suddenly my husband turns from my masterpiece killer into a lost little boy. “I’ve never asked.” I expect getting his head around Esther was tough enough, and I also know he only ever saw Carlo as his father. “Why are you asking?”
I shrug lamely. “I don’t know.” My hand goes to my stomach, and that tells him everything. And perhaps subconsciously I am wondering, since I have no parents.
He smiles, standing and coming to me, kneeling before me and resting his hands on my thighs. “This family not big enough for you?”
“Of course, it’s just—”
“Carlo Black is my father. Carlo Black is Daniel’s grandfather and our baby’s grandfather.”
I purse my lips. Understood. But I don’t say that. Instead, I smile and feel at his face. “We need to talk about the girls that are here. Pearl and Anya.”
“Can we do that later?” he asks.
“Sure.” I relent easily. I just want to make his life easier for a while. “Coffee?”
“Thought you’d never ask.” He stands and stretches, making a noise about it too.
“I’m going shopping with Beau tomorrow to buy something for her to wear at her father’s funeral.”
“Oh?”
“Do not try to stop us.”
“Would I?”
I snort and head for the door as Danny’s phone rings and he mumbles something about there being no rest for the wicked. I look back as I get to the door, seeing him gazing down at his cell on the desk with a dirty look. And I’m reminded that I can try all I like to make his life easier, but I will never fully be able to take him away from this life.
Danny answers in silence as I take the handle, and just as the door meets the frame, I hear him say, “What do you want, Sandy?”
And I walk away wondering who the hell Sandy is.
21
JAMES
“What the fuck is wrong with you? You’ve been a grouchy fuck since we came back from St. Lucia.” I stir my coffee, eyes on Otto, as he moodily taps away on his laptop at the island in the kitchen. Esther’s back. I was banking on that putting a smile on his face, but Esther was here all day yesterday faffing around the house and everyone in it, and Otto was nowhere to be seen.
“Winstable was bought by someone called John Theodore Little,” he says shortly. Okay, so he wants to talk shop.
“And who is John Theodore Little?” I ask, humoring him.
“Don’t know. I can’t find anything on him.”
“That’s strange, isn’t it?”
“Very. I’ll keep digging. Still nothing on Cartwright and I’ve got Len following Natalia Potter.”
“And Burrows?” I ask, wondering what his fucking game is andwherehe is.
Otto looks out the corner of his eye at me, then back over his shoulder, checking the coast is clear. “Beau’s tried calling him. He’s not answering.” He turns his screen toward me, showing me Beau’s phone records, and I sink deeper onto my stool. It could be in shame. It’s not that I don’t trust her, it’s not that Burrows is her ex. The last time they spoke he wanted to meet her, and now nothing? He’s not at work. Annual leave. Escaping? Hiding?
“What are you thinking?” Otto asks.
“I’m thinking Beau is right. Maybe The Bear doesn’t have anyone on the inside anymore, which is why everyone appears to be jumping ship.” I look at Otto. “Which means my conclusion on Burrows is wrong.”
“You don’t think he’s bent?”
