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James looks at her, blank. “Thanks.”
“Welcome.” She puts the glass in his grip and leaves him by the fridge studying it. “Kiwi, blueberries, banana, broccoli, and mango.”
He visibly swallows, staring at the glass. “Mango,” he says, looking at me, and my heart breaks, not only because he reveals the side of his face that I slapped and the evidence is there, but because mango is one of Beau’s favorites. I have to look away, unable to see the utter hopelessness on him. It’s shameful of me, cowardly. I hear the glass meet the counter and look up. He’s not touched it.
“James,” I call as he walks out, but he doesn’t stop. I glance at Danny and see the same despair as I feel. I jump up and grab the green juice, going after him. “James, please. Stop.” I catch him at the bottom of the stairs and grab his arm, stopping him. Of course, he could shrug me off if he wanted to, but he doesn’t, and I’m grateful. He doesn’t face me, so I round his big body and take one step up, putting myself in front of him. And because of the height difference, I see his face. The pain etched across it. The deep stress lines making him look older than he is. Seeing him like this makes me unreasonably mad with Beau. I know why she’s doing this. I feel her despair as much as I do James’s. It also has me making a silent vow to never run out on Danny and leave him wondering and worrying if I’m alive.
“I’m sorry I slapped you,” I say quietly, resting the guilty still-stinging palm on his forearm. “I really haven’t heard from her, I swear it.” I don’t want him to believe I would be cruel enough to leave him in this desolation if I could remove him from it. But I haven’t heard from her so I can’t.
He swallows and lifts his head a fraction, and my heart splinters more when I see his eyes are glazed with tears he’s fighting to hold back. “I need to find her, Rose. Before someone else does.” He clears his throat and roughly wipes at his cheeks on a sniff, and I hold out the glass.
“Drink,” I order, hoping the concoction reloads him with some strength that’s been kicked out of him.
James smiles mildly and humors me, knocking it back and putting the empty back in my hand. “Thanks.”
“No sweat.” I catch him off guard and sling my arms over his wide shoulders, hugging him hard, hoping he feels my love for him. He is literally the only person in this world who can fix Beau. I know it. Danny knows it. Zinnea knows it. Even Beau knows it deep down. He can’t cave. He can’t be anything less than The Enigma right now.
James returns my embrace, dipping a little to accommodate me, holding on to me as tightly as I’m holding him. It takes everything in me not to cry on him.
“I have to go,” he whispers, not breaking away, but instead waiting for me to.
I nod and release him. “Find her, okay?”
He nods and strides off. “Tell Danny I’ll meet him at Hiatus.” The door closes behind him, and a few moments later, Otto appears from the corridor to the office, cursing as he goes after James.
“I told him not to fucking leave without me.” He swings the door open and slams it behind him, just as Goldie stomps out too, also hauling the door open and slamming it behind her. It makes me feel significantly better knowing James isn’t out there alone.
But Beau is.
I am going to seriously kick her ass when she gets home.Ifshe gets home. I flinch and throw a prayer skyward, to a god I don’t believe in, and head back to the kitchen. I walk in to find Esther and Danny on the far side, alone, close, talking in hushed whispers. They both see me and shut up. And doesn’t that piss me off? What am I being kept in the dark about now? I look between them, my expression fierce. “What’s going on?” I ask, not confident I’ll be told but wanting them to know I’m not stupid. Or happy.
Esther looks at Danny and nods, and he steps forward, looking a little awkward. “Mum’s found a school for Daniel,” he says. I look straight to Esther in my shock, as if I need confirmation that I’m not hearing things. She nods.What?I’ve hoped for it, many times, but I thought regular schooling was out of the question. “I don’t want you to get too excited.” Danny comes to me, taking both of my hands. “But it looks promising.”
My heart leaps with joy. “Where?” I ask. “How many kids go there? What’s the name? Is it mixed sex? Because it’s important for him to be with boysandgirls.”
“Whoa.” Danny laughs. “The principal can answer all the questions we have when we visit.”
“We’re visiting?” I cry, excited. “Like regular parents visit regular schools to see if they want their regular kid to go there?” I inhale, something coming to me. “Wait, what did you tell the principal you do?”
“Well, obviously I didn’t tell him that the chances of me falling onto America’s Most Wanted List any day is rather high.”
“That’s good,” I say, looking into thin air, thinking of all the things Daniel will need. Bags, books, pens, sports equipment. We’ll need to go shopping. “When are we going?”
Danny smiles at my enthusiasm and drops a peck on my nose. “I’ve some business to clear up first.”
“We shouldn’t mention it to Daniel until it’s definite,” I say. He’d be broken if I gave him this and then took it away. Danny smiles as he goes, reading my thoughts and fears. If the principal does find out Danny’s who he is, Daniel won’t be getting into that school. Simple. I will do everything in my power to make sure the principal thinks Danny shits rainbows and goes to church every Sunday. Will they check that? If he goes to church? I need to speak to Father McMahon.
“Come with me a minute,” Danny says quietly, taking my wrist and pulling me out into the hallway. He has a quick check around before he speaks. “What do you know about Pearl?” he asks.
“What?” I ask, my forehead bunching.
“She’s been asking after Brad.”
“Ohh,” I breathe. “You too, huh?” I look past him to the kitchen. “James was asking too.”
“I think that’s one of the reasons he fucked off to the hotel and fucked his way through fuck knows how many women.”
I look at Danny, disgusted. “He did what?”
