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I wasn’t blind to Abby’s worries. She didn’t think anyone would stay. But then, she maintained we were only friends-with-benefits. She’d never claimed to feel anything more.
Why should I stick around for that? Especially if it wasn’t good for Brody.
The problem was I was in love with her. Even if she didn’t admit to having any feelings for me. I rubbed the ache in my chest.
I was always ready to leave at a moment’s notice. I needed to clean up Austin’s mess one more time. If Austin was sentenced to prison, it would be over. I could move on. His actions wouldn’t affect my life anymore.
The thought of him not being a factor in my life was enticing. I could live where I wanted. I could buy a house. I could finally attempt a long-term relationship. But where would I be living when that happened? I’d told Abby we might need to leave Maryland to avoid the publicity surrounding his case.
I couldn’t imagine a life where Abby and Hunter weren’t included. The future felt empty without them in it. But I had no control over how she felt about me. She’d told me all along we weren’t anything.
I bit into my first taco as Brody was finishing up. He rose and took three steps toward the living room. “Don’t forget to clear your dishes.”
He shot me a sheepish grin. “Oh, right. I forgot.”
When would picking up after himself finally be a habit? When would I get used to living in a new place without Abby and Hunter nearby? I loved living in this town and coaching the baseball team. And I loved Abby and Hunter.
The thought of leaving sent searing pain through my chest. I set the taco aside as Brody put his dish in the dishwasher and walked out of the room.
I cleaned up my dishes without eating. A sick feeling settled in my stomach.
My phone buzzed on the counter. It was a message from Abby.
Abby: Are you okay?
I huffed out a laugh. I couldn’t remember the last time I was okay with what Austin did. I wished he was a nonentity in my life. I wanted him to be. I was so sick and tired of him causing upheaval. I wanted to make my own decisions for once. I wanted to do what was right for Brody and me.
Nick: Not really.
Abby: You need company?
I would love if I could get lost in her, but I needed to be clear-headed, so I could make the right decision.
Nick: Brody needs me tonight.
Abby: You need to take care of yourself too.
I didn’t answer her because she was right, but I had no idea how to do that and balance it with what Brody needed.
I went into the living room to see if Brody needed help with his homework. When it was done, I let him play video games. He needed the mental escape, just like I did. We played for a couple of hours as I tried to put everything out of my mind.
I wasn’t quite successful and when Brody finally went to bed, I ran over the scenarios in my head. Move far away where we’d never hear Austin’s name again. Stay there and who knew what Brody would have to endure. The best option for Brody was leaving.
Twenty-Three
ABBY
Thursday night, I slipped out of a wedding consultation early to get Hunter to a scrimmage since it was an away game. I’d presented the photography packages early in the meeting, but I still felt bad about leaving.
I liked Gia’s idea of presenting as a team, though. I couldn’t help but think if I was dating Nick, he could have taken Hunter, allowing me to join them later. It was an attractive idea, and on the drive over, I allowed myself to play house. To imagine telling Nick how I felt, being honest with our boys about our relationship, and moving in together.
By the time I arrived at the game, I was feeling pretty good. A warmth had settled in my chest and kept expanding. I was at least open to the idea of having a relationship with Nick. One where we could be open about our desires. Usually, dreaming about the possibilities felt off. But that time, it seemed right.
Hunter immediately went to warm up because he was pitching the first few innings. I knew Brody was hearing things at school about his father because Hunter mentioned it. I didn’t want the boys to get into a fight, but I couldn’t help but think the other kids needed to stop.
My worst fear was that Nick would decide it wouldn’t be good for Brody to stay. If he moved, I couldn’t follow him. My family was there. My business. My partnership with Happily Ever Afters.
When Nick didn’t come over to say hi or send me a knowing look or wink, the uneasy feeling settled in, taking over the lovely dreams on the drive over.
