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I pasted a smile on my face and lifted my eyes. Gideon sent me a small smile and nodded, never one to argue about work, aslong as I wasn’t leaving the office. Aiden was still in his paper, and both Jaxon and Oliver were looking at their own devices. Relief washed over me, realizing no one had picked up on my deception.
The doorbell rang, the signal that Frank had arrived. I downed the last bit of my coffee and popped a piece of sausage into my mouth.
“Thank you for breakfast, big man,”I said, kissing Gideon on the cheek as I walked by.
His big arm snaked out and looped around my waist, pulling me back to him. He kissed the back of my neck and squeezed me tight for a moment.
“Have a good day, stellina,”he said.
I patted his arm and nodded, still feeling the weight of what I knew I would be doing later in the day. I went to Aiden and pulled down the newspaper. His eyes were light and his smile was easy, something that wasn’t normal for him. I pressed a quick kiss to his lips. I repeated the sentiment with Oliver, who also smacked my ass as I walked away. I threw a hot gaze over my shoulder and that had him laughing.
Jaxon stood and took my hand, walking me toward the front door. He opened it and Frank stood in his normal black suit and black sunglasses. If I didn’t know he was personal security, I’d wonder if he was in the FBI, with his serious face and eyes that took in everything around. Frank was light on the details with me about what his past was about, but it was good enough that Gideon trusted him with my welfare.
Frank nodded to me in greeting and went down the steps to the dark sedan we drove everywhere. Jaxon turned me so I was in his arms. He smelled clean with the hint of woodsy scent that came from his products. I had to remind myself I needed to go to work, or I’d want to climb all over him. Lifting a hand, I rubbed at his stubble, always perfectly trimmed. He smiled down at me.
The way his dark eyes seemed to search mine, gave my anxiety a twirl. I tried to wipe away any signs of deception with a small smile in return.
“Be good today,”he said.
“Aren’t I good every day?”I asked.
“Up for debate,”he joked.
Then he took my face in his hands and kissed me deeply. I gripped the back of his sweater, pulling his body flush against mine. He moaned as he slanted his mouth over mine and I opened for him. His tongue slid sensually against mine before he pulled back, nipping my bottom lip and ending the kiss.
“See you at dinner,”he said, his voice taking on a gruff tone.
I nodded and stepped around him to pick up my bag. Slipping the shoes on my feet, I stood and adjusted my skirt and glanced at myself in the mirror that hung on the entry way wall. I could see Jaxon behind me, and when I met his gaze, he adjusted his pants in an obvious sign that he wanted me now.
“No, no, no. I gotta get to work,”I said with a laugh.
Jaxon pretended to lunge for me, but I got out the door with his laughter following me. I turned and blew him a kiss, which made him grin. Frank had the back door open for me and I threw my bags in before sliding into the seat. I waved my fingers at Jaxon, who stood on the front steps watching as we drove away.
As soon as we were through the front gate, my guilt flooded me and the smile fell from my face. Why did doing what I needed to do, need to feel so shitty?
Chapter
Four
Brooklyn
I was lostin thought until Frank cleared his throat from the front seat. I had insisted a few times that I didn’t need to sit in the back when he drove me. However, he said it was easier for to him to see through the front windows without a person sitting in the passenger seat. His interruption to my self condemnation had my eyes meeting his in the rearview mirror.
“Lunch lessons today?”He asked.
“Yes,”I replied.
“You don’t look happy about it. I’m sure Gideon would be more than willing to pick up the education,”Frank said.
It was the same song and dance we went through at least once a week. Frank knew my answer would be no. I knew Frank felt obligated to ask. Gideon had hired him. However, I was his charge. And I had made it fairly clear I would go AWOL if he didn’t accompany me. The idea of being caught without me worried Frank more than my lessons being discovered.
I looked out the window as we approached the outskirts of the city. When I brought up self-defense to Gideon, he acted hurt. It took time for me to explain that it wasn’t that I didn’t trust him to protect her. The attack wasn’t his fault. I had been unprepared for the danger that Lyle posed. And I didn’t want to be in that position again.
I had expected the guys to understand where I was coming from. When I was met with a no that was nonnegotiable, I felt myself bristle. I could make decisions for myself and I knew what I needed the most. Living in the house with my guys did go a long way to my safety, but I couldn’t hide behind their walls all the time. Even with four of them, they couldn’t be with me at all times.
They had been clear they didn’t want me wandering from the house or my office unless previously scheduled. If I wanted to see Ash, I had to tell them before, and Frank had to take me. If I wanted to have lunch outside of the office with co-workers, Frank was right with me. The whole thing felt ridiculous until I remembered it was Gideon who found me with a knife in my stomach. Knowing where they were coming from helped tamp down some of my need to rebel against their hold.
However, the self-defense classes were not an option. Gideon couldn’t teach me. It had become obvious that he couldn’thandle me throwing a punch or taking one. Even if he held back, he still wouldn’t attack me the way Lyle had. And if he wouldn’t threaten me enough, how would I learn to defend myself from that type of attack? Our lessons only caused more friction between us, so I quit them.
