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“You’re so damn cute.”
Caelan leaves it at that. They’ve both been incredibly good about acknowledging I’ve been through some shit and haven’t pushed or even mentioned sex at all.
But I do feel much more stable, just like they said I would. Not perfect, but stable enough. And they’ve been patient and understanding and done everything they can to help me. Far more so than I’d ever expected from a pair of demons, even a pair of demons I’m in a relationship with.
I love them. And I’m pretty sure they maybe love me too.
They won’t say it in as many words. I don’t expect them to, and I don’t need them to either. But it’s in the way Caelan was so broken up and afraid at the idea of losing me. Elias calling me the light of his dawn, with utmost weight and sincerity behind the name.
I love them.
I want them so badly.
Shifting in place so I’m facing Caelan more than the television, I kiss his neck again. Starting at the side, soft but insistent, trailing my lips over the scar across the front of his throat.
Caelan’s breath catches. “Shan,” he warns.
I kiss all the way across the line of scar tissue. Knowing where it came from and what it means, I want to show Caelan with utter reverence that I accept all his past and struggles.
It’s not that scar alone. I slide my fingers beneath Caelan’s top and pull it over his head, leaving him shirtless and amused at how forward I’m being. But he makes no protest. He only grins, eyes heavy-lidded and head tilting back almost unconsciously as I press hot, open-mouthed kisses down his throat, across his collarbones, and to his chest.
More scars. A few of them form a crisscrossing mess that almost makes me wonder if he tried to literally carve out his heart at some point.
Caelan doesn’t seem to mind. He only hisses and arches minutely as I lick along the length of one of them, down to his nipple, and tug it gently between my teeth.
“Doll, what are you trying to do to me?” Caelan mutters, swallowing back a small groan of pleasure.
I don’t know myself, honestly. My heart just feels like it’s overflowing with affection, and I need to express it in whatever way I can. And if that way is in gradually kissing and licking down Caelan’s abs, I’m sure there won’t be any complaints.
As I graze my teeth along Caelan’s deep V-line down to the waistband of his jeans, I giggle, and Caelan twitches. The kisses I’m pressing against him are rapidly morphing into something far from innocent, and I lavish my attention on him.
Despite the way this is escalating, howI’mescalating it, I slow for a moment to press a more somber kiss against the scar of what must have once been a massive gash in Caelan’s side. He says nothing, only lifts a hand to tangle into my hair and sighs, until I move lower and press one of those far-from-innocent kisses over the bulge beginning to show in his jeans.
“Dammit.” He growls. “Little tease. You can’t keep playing around like that and expect me to hold back.”
I pull away, grinning and breathless. I undo my blouse and slide it off my shoulders, then with Caelan’s eyes firmly glued to me, I reach around to unclasp my bra and drop that as well.
“I don’twantyou to hold back.”
“Shit,” Caelan says eloquently, and I laugh. The desire in his eyes as he drinks in the sight of me, topless for him, makes me shiver beneath the weight of it.
For a moment, his eyes linger on my abdomen. On the new inky stain on the skin there, marking how close I came to being gone. But then his hands slide up my sides, cupping my breasts, and this time it’s my turn to moan.
My eyelids flutter, and I hum in pleasure. But I’m not finished.
I shoo his hands away, then lean back in to resume my initial task. I straddle his lap, back to teasing his neck now with kissing and nips, not hard enough to leave marks, but hard enough he can certainly feel it. My hand between us rubs over the crotch of his jeans, then I bite down on his throat, and his cock twitches.
As much as a sadist as he may be, Caelan has a masochistic streak of his own as well.
“Shannon,” he hisses out my name.
It’s just making out, some heavy petting, maybe, but it’s clear he’s into it. Maybe he’s a little worked up since they’ve kept their distance, waiting for me to be ready. It doesn’t matter why. I just want to make him feel good.
If I’m honest, some part of me is curious. Howdoesit feel for him?
“Wait a sec,” I murmur. I lean back just a little, enough to give myself some breathing room, and I take off Elias’ ring. Without it, I can just… let myself feel. After all, it’s easier to let their energy in than to block it. I firmly palm Caelan’s cock through his jeans, and the wave of his arousal hits me. My eyes widen.
“Oh, damn.” I groan, heat curling in my core.
