Page 170 of Darkest Desires


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“Thank you.”

“I just want to make sure you’re certain. What will you do about your apartment and your education? Your job?”

I count them off on my fingers. “I have to give one month’s notice on the contract for the apartment. I can put that in immediately. And Caelan said it would be okay if I used the car, right? This is my final semester. I can handle the commute for the last few months. My job…” I wince a little at that one. “I don’t know if they’d take me back after vanishing for two weeks, and honestly, I’m too anxious to ask about it. Can I just keep pretending I’m dead?”

Elias huffs a laugh. “No.”

“Fine,” I say, sticking my tongue out. “But, for real. I think… I’m going to resign. It was only a temporary entry-level position anyway. I needed it for experience and to cover the rent on the apartment, but if I’m living here, that won’t be a problem anymore. I’ll focus on finishing my degree and see what I can find to make an actual career out of after that.”

“That sounds reasonable.”

“I mean, I think pretending to be dead is also pretty reasonable,” Caelan adds, and I grin.

“It is not.”

“Compromise,” I say. “They already think I was hospitalized, right? I’ll say it’s likely I’ll be incapacitated for a bit and offer to resign. It’s a legit reason.”

“You don’t need a reason, darling. You should be free to leave at any time.”

I shrug. “I feel bad without one, though.” And anyway, it’s not exactly a lie. I’m starting to adjust, or stabilize, or whatever Elias terms it. I feel comfortable enough to go back to classes on Monday. But work is a more stressful beast, and I’m not sure if I’d be able to handle that on top of everything else.

“So, is that it then?” Caelan asks.

“I think we’re all in agreement,” Elias confirms.

A slow, wide grin spreads across Caelan’s face, and he drags me into an abrupt, tight embrace that makes me squeak. “Oh, hell yeah! You’re gonna live with us.”

I laugh. His enthusiasm is infectious. I’d been turning the idea over in my head most of the week, rationalizing everything so logically and actively trying not to get my feelings involved to the point that it never really sank in. I’m going tolive with them.

Caelan enthusiastically pulls me off the sofa and spins me around before kissing me firmly. “This is gonna be so much fun.”

Elias swipes a glancing blow to the side of Caelan’s head, more teasing than anything. “This does not mean constant sex. She needs to work, as do you and I.”

“’Course, I know that. I ain’t stupid. But we’re still living together. That’s kind of a big deal.”

Elias smiles slowly. “Yes. I suppose it is.”

“So. So, Shan, when are you moving in?”

I give him a wry grin. “I feel like I’ve already half moved in. Not much sense going back…”

“We’ll help you arrange transportation for your belongings,” Elias says, placing a hand on my back.

“Oh. Well, honestly. Not much need for that. The apartment was a furnished rental, so none of the furniture is mine, and it’s so small I don’t exactly have much stuff. I can get everything moved in one car trip. I can do it, maybe, this weekend sometime? If that’s okay with you.”

“Of course.”

“Hey.” Caelan purrs. He’s still smiling wide enough that my cheeks hurt just looking at him. “We’re gonna live together.”

I giggle. “I know.”

“We’re, like… a proper thing.”

“I think we’ve been a thing for a while,” I tease.

“But moving in is all official and shit, like, a long-term arrangement.”

For a moment, I can’t place it. I’ve heard that phrase before. The very first night I spent with them. Caelan had talked about long-term arrangements with pets they got along with.

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