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I try to glance away, my stomach sinking, but Elias won’t let me. “I just thought, you’re not exactly human, so it’s not fair to expect you tobehuman.”
“You think we’re not capable of love? That is quite the assumption you’re making.”
His voice is low and even, not admonishing me, but guilt pangs through me just the same. I never thought about it from their point of view. How awful to assume they can’t feel or love to the same extent just because of what they are. What the hell do I know about demons to be making judgments like that?
“I didn’t mean…”
Elias must see the realization dawn in my eyes because he chuckles. “You were protecting yourself. If we can’t love, you need not concern yourself whether we love you or not, is that correct?”
God. How can he do that?Just cut straight through my bullshit, take all my stupid concerns and insecurities that feel like an unmanageable, tangled mess in my head, and bring them down into something so succinct and terrifyingly accurate.
Elias has brought up the exact question I was trying to hide from this whole damn time, and I don’t know if I can face it. Then again, it seems to be a night for falling apart, so if it goes badly, at least I have a head start on that.
“Do you?” I ask softly. “Love me?”
Immediately, I regret the words. Just saying them makes me want to run and avoid ever having to hear the answer, afraid of what it might be.
Everything was so much easier when this was just a stupid fling.Why did I have to go and get attached?
Elias hums in consideration. “I care for you. I feel very protective of you. And understand, I have no intention of letting you go.”
“You belong to us, Shannon,” Caelan says. His hand slides beneath my pajama top, over the small of my back, and I gasp as a small twinge of pain runs through the wound left there.
Last night, he carved his name into me, marking me as his.
It’s not love. They haven’t, and they won’t say that, but it doesn’t hurt as much as I was expecting it to.I’mthe one moving way too fast and falling for them when I barely know them, and I didn’t expect their love, really. Maybe they could love me as time goes on and we grow closer. But as long as I don’t lose this, lose what I have with them now, I’m fine with it. That they care on any level is more than I could have dreamed of.
Belonging to them.
I can be happy with that.
“Now,” Elias says, brushing my hair from my face. “Are you ready to talk about what set all of this off?”
I shake my head, not as a no to his question but as a dismissive gesture. “I’m sorry,” I apologize again. “I’d been letting all that bullshit fester for too long, is all. It was the gala, all those other people there, so much more successful and with their lives together, I just… got even more insecure than usual. And then seeing you use your powers…”
Elias frowns. “Is that a concern for you?”
“No! It was the context of it. Because it wasn’t really you on stage, it was just a gimmick again, a front for Goëtica, and everyone else in that room believed that. It just fucked with my head a little.” I pause, wiping my eyes, then sniff and continue with a sigh. “That, and… you were so reluctant about seeming inhuman in front of me earlier, but then you go and do that in front of a random audience? Like you trust them more than me.” I shake my head at myself. “It’sdumb. I do get it, I promise. It’s totally different things, the gala shit was just for show. Playing your part. But it just… set everything off, I guess. That’s all.”
“I see.”
“The demon thing doesn’t bother me at all, I swear. I really like seeing you use your powers. It’s kind of hot. And when you talk likethat—” I cut myself off, blushing when I realize I’m going to gush if I’m not careful.
Fortunately, Elias doesn’t call me out on it. “Are you certain? Do not think I didn’t notice your distance after I created the mask for you earlier.”
“Oh. That. No, that was just more insecure bullshit. You’re so powerful and incredible, and it just hit me how out of my league you are. But, honestly, have you seen how gorgeous you guys are? I’d probably be thinking the same even without the demon magic shit.”
Elias huffs a small laugh. “You have strange priorities.”
“It’s part of being human. We’re all fucking messes.”
“You say that as though demons ain’t,” Caelan comments idly, a statement I don’t have time to unpack all the implications of.
“But I’m… your mess?” I say tentatively. Hopeful.
“Ours,” Elias reiterates firmly, then his lips are on mine, and I find myself melting into the heat of his kiss.
ChapterFourteen
