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To always have a watcher, a friend—
Was that what the lynx cub, Syn, sensed within me? Had she jumped on me because she knew I harboured the spirit of a lynx?
Niya bowed her head to mine. “You know...if you choose to stay and become Nhil, you’ll undergo the same ceremony. Solin will ask the fire for your spirit guardian, and you’ll be inked in their image...so you will never be alone again.”
My heart ached for such a thing.
But...if I became Nhil, then I was turning my back on my past. I was choosing another over someone I had forgotten.
My breath came fast, pain and confusion heavy on my chest.
“You don’t have to decide now,” Niya said quietly. “You’re welcome to stay with us for however long you want.”
I caught her eyes, my shoulders slouching with relief. “Your family is very generous.”
She laughed, nudging my shoulder with hers. “Wait till you know us better. We can be greedy too. And competitive.” She pointed with her chin to a man on the opposite side of the large fire, the one with a shaved skull and thick braid running down the centre. “That’s Aktor. He’s heir to the chiefdom. He thinks he’s the best hunter, but...” She winked. “I’ve bested him a time or two, but don’t ever tell him that. Otherwise, you might witness his quickfire temper.”
I shuddered as Aktor looked away from the man he spoke to at his side, his black eyes locking onto mine through the fire, almost as if he knew we were talking about him.
Niya muttered under her breath, “He’ll no doubt pull you aside one day and try to intimidate you. He takes his responsibility as the chief’s son seriously and loves nothing more than to find dangers that others do not see, to prove to us that he’ll be a good leader when the time comes.” Her voice fell a little. “He can be...aggressive when he believes he’s in the right, so just be careful. He’ll do whatever it takes to prove that you’re dangerous.”
I bit my bottom lip. “Should I leave? I don’t want to be a—”
“You only leave if and when you’re ready,” Niya interrupted me, a giant grin spreading her pretty face. “But right now, I have a much more important question.” Leaning closer, she asked, “Are you having fun?”
Fun?
I think I knew that word, yet had I ever experienced the meaning of it?
Shrugging shyly, I said, “I’ve never been around so many people before.”
“That you remember.” She cocked her head. “I’m sure you come from a large, loving clan who regularly enjoyed gatherings like this. They’re probably going mad with missing you.”
My heart clenched at the thought of someone I loved desperately trying to find me.
His touch felt as icy and as fatal as midnight—
I gasped, lost in the emptiness within me, unable to swallow around the pain. “Do your people have feasts like this often?”
Bending on the log where we sat side by side, she grabbed the wooden cup by her feet. Sipping her purple drink, she nodded. “Every part of life is worth celebrating, don’t you agree? A good hunt? A plentiful forage. A new birth. Marriage...a new guest.” Putting her drink down, she took a platter of food that a man passed her way and presented it to me. “Pick something. You haven’t eaten all night. You’re one of us now and must join in the festivities.”
My cheeks blazed with gratitude. I stumbled over something to say.
“Try the bison.” She arched her chin at the overladen platter: fresh fruit, fire-baked vegetables, and a wooden bowl holding glossy, decadent honey. In the centre rested a pile of smoked meat strips.
I frowned.
I knew all those words. I knew what each word described. And I knew what most things would taste like. Yet...I couldn’t remember when I’d eaten them, where, or with who.
Misreading my frown as disapproval, Niya sat straighter and placed the bone platter on her lap. “Here. I know it can look unappetising, but allow me to make you a mouthful that I promise will taste divine.”
“Oh, I didn’t mean...I wasn’t looking at it as if it wasn’t good.” I wrung my hands. “I just...I know what each item is called, but I can’t remember where I’ve had them before.”
Lowering her hands from wrapping a strip of bison meat around a sliver of apple and dipping it into the honey, she sighed. “I can’t imagine the confusion you must feel.” She smiled gently. “And never worry that you’ve offended me. It takes a lot more than a frown to do that.”
I slouched in relief, taking the meal she made me. “Thank you. For everything.”
“You don’t have to keep thanking us. Or apologising.” Making her own apple, meat, and honey mouthful, she added, “Tonight, stop thinking. Just watch, listen, eat, and enjoy. Tomorrow, you can worry again.” Placing the morsel on her tongue, she chewed with a loud moan. “So good.”
