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His eyes were still as they looked at me. His hand remained pressed into my body. “I come here every night to be with you. My hand rests here to feel the life we made together. So what makes you think I want to be anywhere else?”
“The look in your eyes…”
He stared at me.
“You look sad.”
“That’s just how I look, sweetheart.”
“No, it’s not,” I said quickly. “Your eyes are empty. You look like…you’ve lost everything.”
He stared at me without breathing, wearing the most strategic poker face I’d ever seen. He completely shut me out, barring access to his complex thoughts and deep emotions.
“Bartholomew…”
He pulled his hand away then sat forward on the couch, giving me his shoulders and back.
Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything.
“I asked Bleu to take my place. He agreed. I made the introductions. Briefed him on all our projects. Announced my imminent retirement to the men who have served me these last ten years. I’m not going to lie and pretend this has been easy. I’m not going to lie and pretend I won’t miss it sometimes.”
“If this isn’t what you want—”
“It is. But it doesn’t make it easy. I’ve had nothing my whole life—except this. Without it…I’m nothing.”
“That’s not true.”
He rose from the couch then walked toward the fire so he could stare at it. “I’m no longer the man you fell for. I’m not dangerous. I’m not powerful. I’m not enigmatic. I’m just…me.”
I came up behind him, staring at his back. “That’s what I want, Bartholomew. That’s all I’ve ever wanted. Just you.”
He didn’t turn around.
“This baby will change my body. I’ll never be the same. But I know you’ll still love me.”
He turned his head first, and then the rest of his body followed.
My hands moved up his chest until I cupped his cheeks. “I’m so in love with you. Not your money. Not your power. But your heart. Your loyalty. Your eyes. You don’t need the Chasseurs… Not when you have me…us.”
His eyes were glued to my face. He didn’t draw breath. He didn’t blink. He stayed that way for a long time, his eyes locked on mine as he gauged my sincerity. Then his arms suddenly circled me, and he pulled me into his chest. His mouth didn’t crush against mine. Instead, he hugged me. Rested his chin on my head. And held me in front of the fire.
30
LAURA
I sat on the balcony in my bikini, letting the sun soak into my skin because it was a warm day despite the month. Now my stomach was so protruded, there was no doubt that I was pregnant.
I heard the door open and close from inside the room, so I knew Bartholomew was back.
He took the seat beside me and pulled out a Styrofoam container from a plastic bag. “Riso gelato.” He took off the lid and handed me a spoon.
“Thank you.” I grinned as I grabbed it from him and took my first bite. “Oh, I missed this. I used to eat this all the time as a kid.”
He sat back and watched me. “Then I suspect our kid will too.”
“You don’t want to try it?”
He shook his head. The man never ate sweets. Didn’t touch the basket of bread at dinner. Always had chicken with vegetables for dinner. Basically, he was the most boring man alive.
