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“I surrender,” I called, raising my voice so it might be heard above the edges of the pit. I didn’t look at Kassian. I couldn’t - not when he didn’t know I’d been planning on this.
Hoping desperately I’d never have to do it. But planning for it.
“I will not sacrifice my loved ones - they have given enough! I surrender my claim to the throne of Saori Sang, and my place in the Trials of the Moon.” I cried my words to the waiting crowd, hoping things would make sense to them - praying the mist would follow through on its promise that I had to be destroyed before I could be reborn.
I turned to Kassian, embracing him one final time. “I’m sorry. I’m not leaving you, but please don’t follow me,” I begged. He tried to stop me, his fingers scrabbling at my arms and his dark eyes full of pain and questions I couldn’t answer yet.
I pulled away from him and fled, bursting through the stunned crowd and running. I didn’t stop running until I was deep in the woods, far from the Vault and lost in the Sans Cesse Mountains.
Except that I wasn’t lost, because deep in the shadows of the snowy woods, the mist swirled into the shape of Nicolas.
“I know you feel defeated,mon amour, but you have done so well,” he said, and I ached to fall into his arms and be held.
“If this doesn’t work...”
“It will work,” he said calmly, settling near me on the ground. He looked so real. So very nearly solid yet lacking the final piece that could make him mine again.
As we sat without speaking, my mind spinning with questions I knew he wouldn’t be able to answer, I felt the surge of Khione’s magic in me. Barking a tired laugh, I flopped down onto my back.
“How dare you come to me now, Goddess? When I asked for you, you refused.” But her voice was silent. No... I sat up, looking at Nicolas in confusion. Her voice wasn’t silent. It was gone.
“By surrendering, you accepted destruction. This is your winter. The Goddess has not forsaken you,mon amour. She has left her gifts in your heart and moved on like Iaga.” Nic’s explanation was simple yet so, so complex.
The mist swirled again, and Grand-mère was suddenly there. “You see, child? All is well. The Goddess just took off your training wheels,” Grand-mère said with a cackle of mirth. “Ride free, Kana. Merden is still yours to kill.”
Laughter bubbled up in my throat as I finally understood. I closed my eyes and dug my fingers into the crust of the snow, searching for Khione’s power - my power. I found it easily, trembling as I felt its immensity.
“Something about this feels anticlimactic,” I admitted, swirling the snow before me into the shape of a tiny palace. I could move the ice and snow with my mind now. I could sense the blood of a nearby animal and slow it with a thought, trapping its life in my palms.
And all of this was good, but it would have been so much more helpful an hour ago.
“You are not the only one with things to prove,” Grand-mère said, the shadow of her hand passing over mine like she couldn’t quite get used to not touching me, either.
“Luca,” I said, nodding. “If I want him, we have to break the contract.”
“And Kassian,” Nic said. “He is youraimanow, but something in him still resists the idea of King. He doesn’t see himself as worthy on his own - only through you.”
“He has to fight Merden,” I realized suddenly. Kas would need to fight Merden and win to claim the throne. It couldn’t be Luca. “How will he possibly win, when I couldn’t beat her?” Panic slammed into me - Merden couldn’t win the Trials.
“Now, Kana, I know you’ve taken threeaimanow. But sometimes I wonder if you even know why,” Grand-mère chuckled, shaking her head at me. I blinked at her, having no idea what she meant.
Thankfully, Nicolas smiled, rescuing me. “The bond,mon amour. Share Khione’s magic with Kassian through youraimabond.”
“Holy fuck,” I breathed, the pieces finally - fucking finally - sliding into place. “You know, this all could have been a lot goddamn easier.” But I was smiling as I grumbled the words. Sure, the mist had come at this problem in the most convoluted, twisting way, but it was Haret.
And magic never took the expected path. It wanted us to learn, grow, and trust, not follow simple linear rules or instructions we were handed.
“But what about Luca? I never had a chance to tell him the rest of the plan,” I warned Nic.
“I will tell him. He will do it,” Nic assured me.
“And if he chickens out, I believe you have a special way with magic,” Grand-mère said, smirking to herself as she started to fade away.
“I love you, Kana. This will work. Next time I see you...” Nic trailed off, as though he was afraid that speaking the words might curse them into impossibility.
“In the mist,” I said softly, reaching my hand for his even though we couldn’t touch yet. The mist dissolved quickly,leaving me sitting on the forest floor alone again, to feel into my new power.
“It’s kind of nice not having your voice in my head, Khione,” I murmured to the quiet mountain, wondering if my eyes were black again. “Thank you for trusting me with your magic.”
