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Five minutes later I’m in black leggings, a hot pink sports bra, and lacing my matching Asics. “Okay, I’m ready.”
Mack looks up from his phone, his now heady eyes roaming over my entire body. “You need to get out that door before we don’t leave at all.” There’s a seductive rasp to his voice.
My cheeks flush as I hide my smile. I walk out the door, waiting for Mack to come through before locking it behind us. Following his request, I take off in a jog, directing him to the right, toward a running trail behind our apartment complex. One of the things I love about Oregon is how outdoor activity friendly it is. There are biking and running trails everywhere. Avery and I chose this apartment specifically because it’s next to one of our favorite greenways that runs along a river and leads you straight to campus if you go far enough.
“Why are you smiling?” Mack’s voice breaks through my thoughts about the time Avery and I first ran this trail and got so lost our three mile run turned into eight.
“I’m thinking about how many times I’ve done this with Avery. It’s not that I didn’t think about you being crazy enough to run for fun too–I know you played soccer–I just never imagined we’d be doing it together.”
He glances back and slows his speed to fall into line with me. “I’ve thought about a lot of things we’ve been doing together.”
“Really? Like what?” I ask, a little out of breath.
“I don’t know. Everything. Going out on Saturday nights, staying in for lazy Sunday mornings. I want it all with you.” His voice is sweet and genuine, not affected at all from the first mile.
“Every weekend we spend together makes me wish we could have that all the time. I love being able to do whatever you’re doing. Like this. And soon, we will get to.”
“I love this too. When things calm down with the band, we will have even more freedom. We could do whatever we want.”
“Wait, what do you mean calm down?” I shift my body so I’m nearly running sideways, trying to discern what he means from his body language or face somehow.
“I don’t know. I mean, I’ve loved playing, especially this last year, but it’s not something I plan on doing forever. I’ve realized there are other priorities in my life now.”
“Do you mean me?” My stomach flutters at the thought even though I shouldn’t assume. “I don’t want to be the reason you don’t live out your dream.”
“It’s not like that. I love music and my band. I just don’t see us getting big enough to justify it being my whole life. I’ve realized as I get older that I want more than that.
“What do you want?”
“Eventually, I’d like to come back here. When I’m ready to settle down, buy a house, start a family and all that, ya know? I want to be closer to Avery for that too. I don’t want to miss out on being there for her, since our parents aren’t around. And I’d like you to be there for all of it too. If that’s something you want.”
Wow, this got serious. My heart rate picks up, even though our running pace hasn’t. I loved hearing his vision. It’s more real than just an invitation to pick up my life for him right now. He’s actually thought about what our life could look like.
“Does that freak you out?” I must have gotten lost in my head for a little too long again. “I’m sorry, I’m trying to be honest. I know our relationship is moving fast and you just agreed to move in with me, and that’s a big enough step in itself…”
I stop running, and reach out to run my fingers along his wrist to get his attention. He stops and turns toward me. Worry is evident in his eyes, and I can’t help but to want to calm it. “Can you find us a house next door to Avery and Miller?” My smile is big enough he must know I’m serious.
“Wait, really?” He still seems unsure.
I step so close to him I can feel the heat of our run radiating off him. I lace my fingers through his before looking at him. “Honestly, I hadn’t thought that far into the future. Deciding to move to California last night was the most direction I’ve taken in my life in a while. But hearing you lay out that vision…Just because I don’t necessarily know what career is in my future, doesn’t mean I don’t know who I want to be in it. I’m enjoying this so much. Us. I love where we are headed, now and in the future that exists in your head.” As I talk, I watch light replace the worry in his eyes.
He unlinks one of his hands from mine. Bringing his free hand to my chin, he grazes his fingers along my jaw, tilting my face to his. His other hand moves to grip my hip, pulling me to his body as his lips press into mine. He doesn’t try to make out with me, just stills for a moment against me as we stand in the middle of the paved path, enclosed by trees.
His lips pull away from mine but his hands don’t. Our gaze stays locked for a moment, so I see the smirk in his eyes, before it crosses his face. He steps away from me and takes off running, back the way we came.
I take off after him.
CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR
Pullingupinmydusty red Corolla, I see the tour bus already parked in its place behind the bar. I check my makeup in my visor mirror one last time before stepping out onto the pavement. It’s cold tonight, but I know I’ll be hot once I'm inside surrounded by a few hundred people, so I'm wearing black jeans and a plain gray t-shirt. I text Mack to let him know I'm here and not even a minute passes before the side service door opens, my perfect boyfriend sticking his head out with a grin on his face, waving me over. As soon as I reach him, he wraps his arms around me–like he didn't see me two weekends ago–surrounding me in his cinnamon scent. He pulls back only to kiss me, letting his lips stay pressed into mine for a moment before he turns to go back inside.
I follow him in and see they are almost finished setting up. One barback wipes the counter while another dumps ice into the well. This venue is way bigger than the one he usually plays in California. There’s a side of the stage sectioned off by a curtain. He has a stool set up for me by his extra guitar and some mic stands so I can watch the show more comfortably. I’m excited to see him play again now that I know what to expect and have listened to every song enough times to have them memorized.
His show was perfect. I love seeing him in his element because he looks so happy when he’s playing music. But after they finish packing their equipment, he finds me with a smile on his face that I love more. He’s got a box of equipment in his hands and motions for me to come with, so I follow him to the underneath storage of the bus, where he slides in the last box.
Grabbing my hand, he leads me onto the bus and walks me to the back. There’s a community space that’s lined with black leather couches, a small coffee table in the middle. We sit on the side of the couch and Mack’s arm instantly reaches around my shoulder as he kisses the side of my head. He’s playing with my hair, twisting it around his fingers and tugging on it slightly as he watches his buddies. I wish I never had to be away from him. I can’t wait to be in California together. His touch, even just his presence, is enough to comfort and ground me every single time.
My attention is pulled away from him as I see the drummer dumping a white powder out of a small baggie onto the table. I know it's cocaine, despite never having seen it before. I watch it being scraped into a thin line with a credit card. As I look at Mack with wide eyes, the drummer also looks in our direction. “Mack?” He nods in the direction of the table, with a smirk on his face.
