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“Not a problem. Are you all packed up and ready to go?”
Just like that, the nerves returned in full force. I might have only spent one night under Myra and Bennett’s roof, but that was all it took to grow comfortable. And now, less than twenty-four hours after I arrived, I was moving again, this time, into my position as a live-in nanny to a man I didn’t know.
I swallowed down my anxiety, determined to stay strong. “Um, yes.” I set the coffee mug back down and turned to face Myra. “I can’t thank you enough for all you’ve done for me. I don’t just mean the clothes and everything, but helping me get this job, taking me in last night. You’ve been an amazing friend, Myra. None of this would have happened without you.”
Reaching up, she cradled my cheek in her soft, delicate palm. “It would have, my darling girl,” she said, those words brimming with certainty. “It might have taken a little longer, but you’re incredibly strong and brave. You would have made this happen for yourself eventually.”
There wasn’t a single ounce of doubt in her voice. She spoke as though what she was saying was fact.
“Head downstairs whenever you’re ready. I’ve made you a hearty breakfast to send you off.”
I sniffled, suddenly overcome with emotion as I lunged for this woman who had become my lifesaver. I wrapped her in atight hug, burying my face in the crook of her neck. “I’m going to miss you, Myra,” I told her in a watery voice full of tears I was working diligently to keep back.
She patted my back affectionately. “Oh, honey. There’s nothing to miss. This room is yours whenever you want to use it. And I’ll expect you to be in attendance for family dinner once a week.”
She took me by the arms, pushing me back so she could meet my eyes. “This isn’t the end of something, Deva. It’s just the start. I meant it when I said you were family now, and family looks out for each other.”
“You’re too good to me,” I said, my voice thick with emotion. “I think the best day of my life might have been the day I met you.”
Myra lit up, like a bulb somewhere deep inside her had been flipped on, radiating happiness and light from the inside out. “The feeling is very mutual, my darling girl.” She cleared her throat and blinked rapidly to fight back her own emotions. “You know, I never felt like something was missing from my life for not having children of my own. It wasn’t something I thought would happen for me, but I’m seeing now that was Fate’s plan all along. It waited for me to be strong and mature enough for the day you and Jase and Farah would come into my life. I needed to have lived and experienced things young people don’t usually experience in order to guide you through. Now that I’ve done that, you three were plopped right down in my lap. Like it was meant to be.”
I coughed to cover the sob that wanted to burst free from my chest. “You know, you keep talking like that and I’m going to start crying.”
She sniffled and batted at her cheeks on a laugh. “Well, we can’t have that now, can we?” She cupped both my cheeks this time, her eyes boring into mine, communicating without havingto say a word. “Come on down whenever you’re ready. The three of us will have breakfast together, then we’ll take you over to Laeth’s.”
“I’m nervous,” I admitted in a small, hesitant voice as I wrung my hands together in front of me.
“Nothing to be nervous about, sweetie. Laeth might seem like a tough nut to crack, but you have my word that, beneath everything, he’s a good man. He’s been struggling lately, but you may be just the person to help him out of this funk he’s been in.”
She had so much faith in me.
I hoped I didn’t let her down. Because disappointing her would break my heart.
Chapter
Nine
LAETH
I feltlike I was fighting my way through quicksand. My brain was fuzzy and every one of my muscles was weighed down with exhaustion.
Needless to say, after the nightmare the night before, getting back to bed had been impossible. I don’t know how long I lay there, tossing and turning, the images from the goddamn dream stamped onto the backs of my eyelids. It must have been hours.
Then, like clockwork, just as my eyelids began to feel heavy, my bedroom door crashed open and the little hurricane of a toddler came barreling in, launching himself onto my bed without a single word as he burrowed beneath the covers beside me. It never failed to amaze me how much room Cash’s little body could manage to take up. Or how sharp his elbows and knees were. Then, of course, there was the habit he had of shoving his feet beneath my thighs for warmth. Though, I didn’t understand why he needed it, given his body put off an ungodly amount of heat.
It was so bad; I usually woke up sweating from having him pressed up against me. I’d even rushed out during my lunch break one day to get one of those digital forehead thermometersto keep on hand because I could have sworn the kid was running a fever.
But nope! He was just a miniature furnace with enough power to heat an entire room.
I would have gladly called in late to work if it meant getting another couple hours of sleep, but my son’s internal alarm clock wouldn’t let him sleep past six, and hitting the snooze button was out of the question. I’d tried, believe me, but that only led to full-on Meltdown Mode for him. If he was awake, I was awake. Only, he looked fully rested, his little cheeks rosy and ready to start the day, while I’d have given my left nut for just five more minutes.
It had been more than a month of this: shitty, restless sleep riddled with nightmares and a toddler with lava as blood who pulled ninja moves in his sleep. He also had an impeccable gift for nailing me right in the crotch.
I moved to the kitchen, desperately needing the boost only caffeine would provide if I had any hope of functioning like a normal human being today. Still, I had to admit that the standard level of exhaustion I could only assume came with being a single parent still didn’t suck as bad as waking up four times a week with a hangover. I might have missed the numbness that came with drinking, but I definitely didn’t miss that part that came with it. But before I could go after that bold, rich goodness, I had to take care of the little human who ran on lithium batteries that never seemed to drain.
“What kind of cereal do you want for breakfast, bud?” I asked as I pulled open the pantry and stared into it like I was staring into the abyss. The selection inside was sorely lacking. With life and work and basically everything, I hadn’t had much time to get to the store lately, so each of the boxes inside contained mere dregs.
“Fwench Toes.”
