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I thought it never would be.
At least until they sauntered into my life.
The three men who have somehow slipped past my defenses and are trying to worm their way into my heart. I truly don’t know why they would want to. If you're here, you’ve met me and you know how I am. I’m a bitch. I’m jaded. I’m selfish. I’m defensive. The truth is I’m all those things and more.
So what is it they see that I’m not?
Kai Zhao, my devilishly handsome jokester. A bright light on the darkest of days. One that seems to shine so hotly, that evenIhave a hard time pushing him away. All I want to do is hold him closer, tighter and let him melt the ice that’s been encasing my heart for years. But I can’t. As inviting as he is, he’s also just as dangerous. I’m not his only fan, just one of many.
If I get too close, I won’t just thaw: I’ll burn.
Nicolás De León, my infuriatingly sexy Spanish asshole. What do I even see in him? Is it a reflection of me? All he does is piss me off, make me violent, and yes all hot and bothered too. Yet, the thought of him not being around to go toe to toe with me…
It stings in a way I can’t quite put words to.
Ezra Grayson, my gentle giant. The one who is as blunt and honest as he isbig. The one who has never given me a reason to continue pushing him away. The one that is the hardest to try and run from. And that’s why he’s the most dangerous of them all. He’s too trustworthy, too dependable, too loving, too…everything.
I would forget how to live without him.
But enough of all that. You’re not here to listen to me waffle and whine. You’re here because you want answers. Answers that only I can give you.
Well here it is: the final half to my origin story.
Am I a villain? Am I a victim? Am I something else?
That’s for you to decide.
Buckle in, bitches. It’s a wild ride.
1
“Wicked!” Officer Bass’ voice is jovial and slurred in a way I’ve never heard before as he makes his way towards our little group, the sounds of many conversations and laughter flowing around us all. “I’m so glad you made it, you know, with everything going on.”
“Officer Ass! You know I’d never miss a chance at a good party!” I grin widely in his direction, brushing my–for once–curled hair out of my face for the thousandth time as the guys exchange hellos with Bass.
I can’t do my own hair for shit, but funnily enough, Kai is rather talented at doing hair and makeup. Another one of those hidden skills from his childhood that I know holds far more weight and meaning than the nonchalant attitude he uses when talking about it. One day he’ll tell me, I know that. So, for now, I’ll just let him pamper me while I continue giving him the space he needs to work up to revealing those shadow-edged secrets to me.
I’m not rushing this shit. No way in hell. For once, I want to try and do something the healthy and normal way, and reading his mind when his aura flickers with pain and darkness is definitely not the right way to do it. I actually find myself…caring for the jovial and mischievous trickster who’s hand is currently squeezing the life out of my ass through the thin material of my dress.
“No need to play it cool and act like you didn’t threaten to sic Gizmo and Snitch on us if we didn’t bring you. We know youactuallykind of care about people.” The hand on my ass flies off as my elbow meets Kai’s stomach.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about, Zhao. Stop trying to kill my street cred.” Shifting my body into the massive form on my other side, I claim nonchalance as he wheezes out a grunt of pain. Ezra’s arm, like the gentleman he is, rests on my mid back with his ape-sized thumb rubbing soothing paths over the sensitive skin that my dress leaves bare.
I feel my third shadow press in behind us before his smooth accented tone speaks directly in my ear. “Alan’s heading over here.”
My spine goes rigid through the flush of goosebumps Nic’s voice leaves peppering my skin, and I pretend to laugh at whatever Kai is saying to Bass before lowering my voice and speaking only so Nic can hear. “Does he look angry?”
“Sí.”
“Shit.” Nic’s presence retreats slightly, but he stays close as Alan’s aura finally reaches where I can feel it. Ezra’s thumb ceases its tender strokes just as Kai’s joke to Bass tapers off and he returns to close in on my other side.
“What the hell are you guys doing here?!” Alan’s voice is rough and strangled, his aura a flurry of anger, sadness, and so much more that I just can’t place. He has to be doing this shit on purpose, Alan is not normally an emotional sort of man.
“Oh, calm down, Cupcake.” I wave dismissively at him. “I wasn’t going to miss Bass’ wedding for shit. I mean, it’s a cop wedding! There have to be dozens of you all here! What exactly do you think is going to happen?”
I know I have a very valid point, and he does too based on his loss of words and inability to respond, but I also know I disobeyed a direct order by showing up. Not that I can say with any confidence that I’m still employed at the department at this point, so can he even give me orders? A question for another day perhaps.
He called us last week just to tell us we are undernocircumstances supposed to come. Fuck that shit. I’m probably safer in a room full of cops than anywhere else at the moment, even if one of them is my stalker, or heaven forbid, working with him.
