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"Rai." She swallowed. Then she glanced behind her in search of the merry voices I could hear from inside. She stepped quicklyout onto the porch with me and shut the door. "Are you sure it is a good idea for you to be here?"
"Sammy," I said. I cleared my throat. "I—I, Sam, I'm sorry for kissing you." The words tumbled together as I forced them out. I wasn't sorry for kissing her, I was sorry it made it awkward.
Her face crinkled slightly before she shook her head a minuscule amount. "Right, I was going to say the same thing." And just like that, she was my Sammy again, a smile on her beautiful face, even if her body language said something else. I would ignore it because I was selfish and needy.
I only hesitated a moment when she turned around and swung the door wide for us. We walked into the warm, welcoming kitchen, smelling of spices and cooked steak. Mrs. Orion kissed my cheeks and gave me a hug, while Mr. Orion nodded my way from his seat at the table.
"I thought you were bailing," Ty said as I slid into the seat next to him.
"On your mom's food, never," I replied with a wink to Mrs. Orion. She smiled and shook her head as she turned her attention back to the stovetop.
"Dinner is almost done," she said.
Samantha brought plates and silverware over and passed them around the table. It was all so domestic that it made my heart ache. We'd been in these same positions a hundred times, but in none of them before had she avoided making eye contact with me. Usually, she wouldn't pass up the opportunity to tease me. Now the silence between us was deafening. Ty caught my attention and elevated an eyebrow in a silent question. I shook my head. Not here.
Secretly, I watched her every movement, pretending to look at my phone. Until she dropped into the seat across from me, her usual place. At least something was the same.
"How did you do on your English test?" I asked to break the heavy calm between us. It was like diving into the ocean and being tossed around by the waves as I waited for her to respond. It wasn't the question that made me nervous, it was the fact that she might not answer me.
She unfolded the cloth napkin and placed it on her lap. The dead air fell between us, taking my heart with it. Then she lifted her jade green eyes to mine, and the vise on my heart loosened, and I could breathe again. "I passed, thanks to you." Polite, reserved. Her gaze shuttered whatever emotions she had inside, and I wished I was a mind reader.
"I'm sure it was all you," I replied.
"No, it was definitely the studying you helped me with a few weeks ago." She smiled. I smiled. Then silence fell again. Was this how it was going to be forever?
Ty swung his gaze between us before he leaned forward, elbows on the table on either side of his empty plate. "What the fuck is wrong with you two?"
"Tyler Ray Orion, watch your mouth," his mom scolded him immediately, "and get your elbows off the dinner table."
He lifted his elbows and crossed his arms as he watched us, clearly waiting for one of us to fess up. "Do we need to take this to the other room?"
"What! Don't be ridiculous," Sam replied with a scowl.
"Then one of you is going to tell me what is making you both so weird." He raised a single eyebrow as he stared us down. Samantha fidgeted in her seat as her face grew pink all the way to the tips of her ears. She broke eye contact first and shook her head.
"It doesn't concern you, Ty, and it is all over anyway," she said.
Her words hit me somewhere deep inside, ramming against something that was already broken. "Is it?" I whispered. Thewords slipped past my cracked defenses as her brush off echoed in my ears.
She wrinkled her nose at me as we met each other's questioning look. Her cheeks flamed bright with a blush that gave me a sliver of hope. "Is it?" she repeated my question.
"Sounds like you two have some talking to do," Mr. Orion said. He threw me a wink that said,I knew you liked my daughter, and I'm okay with it. At least I hoped that was what the wink meant. "You have a few minutes before dinner is done. Go on, kids, hash this out."
My heart drop kicked my ribcage as hope stirred behind her eyes. She lifted the napkin from her lap and scooted the chair back across the tile. She found her feet, and I followed her actions as she led us from the room.
"You said you were sorry," she said, her back still to me as she crossed the room.
I jerked my shoulders into a shrug when she glanced back at me. "I lied."
"You lied?" she asked with a laugh.
"I don't make a habit of it, but yeah, I thought it was what you wanted to hear," I said.
"Rai," she said as she leaned against the far wall, "I don't do relationships, and you are definitely the relationship type. I'm like Amy in that movie. I use guys and then leave them, except I'm never going to settle down."
I licked my lips as I slowly inhaled, digesting her words, trying to find a workaround. "I really like you, Sammy," I admitted. The vulnerability I was showing made my body feel like I wasn't breathing enough. Maybe I was going to pass out. "I think you like me, too."
Her eyes fluttered, and she looked away. "It isn't that simple."
