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Tessa cleared her throat. “I’m going to step out. You need anything?” Her roomie was the best. She seemed to sense that Caroline would do better without an audience.
“I’m good.” Caroline held up the pint of ice cream and smiled.
Tessa shook her head. “I’ll bring back something for the stomach ache you’re going to have later.”
Once she left the apartment, Caroline looked at Josh, who was standing near the big front window watching something on the street below. It should be illegal for any man to look that good. “So you’re trying to save me?”
He approached her, almost tentatively, and sat on the sofa adjacent to the chair. He was close and she picked up his scent. It was clean, strong—like him.
“Working on something?” He pointed to her laptop and Caroline shrugged.
“I was. My heart’s not in it today.” Caroline knew she was acting like a big baby, that this was all part of the process. Writers were rejected—period. But today’s snub was coming on the heels of being around Josh for a whole month, and feeling like they were going nowhere. He was less than a foot away, taking up all the space in her apartment just like he took up all the space in her head, and she couldn’t have him. She wanted him to hold her. She needed him to.
The past month had been hell. They’d gone out. She’d gotten a few chaste kisses on the cheek. She’d been to his apartment, but Caroline was getting the sense this really was platonic. They were friends. Good friends. But there were no benefits.
She took a spoonful of ice cream and tried not to get too absorbed in the memories from the night they spent together. So much of what she was feeling was wrapped up in emotions, not logic. It was a good thing she had her ice cream. She could focus on that and not on him or her rejected book.
“Want to tell me what happened?” he asked.
She had a mouthful of fudge brownie and cookie dough when she looked up and saw Josh staring at her, his eyes showing a combination of hopefulness and amusement.
“God, you’re a mess,” he said, moving to the ottoman opposite her.
When he brushed a lock of hair off her face she felt all the lovely heat that rushed in whenever he was close to her. Caroline swallowed. “I’m allowed to be a mess. I just found out I’m a no-talent hack.”
“Who told you that?” he asked before placing his big hand on her knee.
“The editor I submitted it to.”
“You submitted? Cool.”
“Not really. I suck.”
“Right. And she said you’re a no-talent hack?”
That wasn’t what the letter said, but that’s how Caroline felt. “I don’t have any talent.”
“Can I see the e-mail? Then I’ll know if you should be throwing yourself off a bridge or just getting good and drunk.”
“You don’t have to make fun,” she said.
“Sure I do. It’s my God-given right, as your friend and a guy, to pick on you.”
She handed her ice cream to him and found the e-mail, turning the laptop to show it to him. “This is your fault. You made me get all brave.”
“I can live with that.” He read the e-mail and then leaned in. “You’re a drama queen.”
Drama queen! She wasn’t Meg, for Pete’s sake. Caroline folded her arms and pulled her knees to her chest. “I am not.” She reached out. “Give me my ice cream.”
“It’s a rejection that said your work wasn’t right for her list. Nowhere did I see the words ‘no-talent hack’. This isn’t even worth getting you drunk over.”
“I can read between the lines. You don’t get it.”
“Good God, you need to get over yourself.”
He took the spoon from her and dug into the ice cream. After eating a healthy bite himself, he continued. “You have to keep at it.”
“Why didn’t she like it?” He kissed her on the forehead and she melted a little because he was being so damned sweet, even when he was picking on her.The bastard.
