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I genuinely like Alex. He’s the first man I’ve had fun with who I don’t wish was gone the second it was over. The danger of linking myself to someone like that again is just as thrilling as it is terrifying.
I’m distracted in a way I shouldn’t be behind the wheel when a flash of lights pulls me from my thoughts. I startle, managing to keep the truck on the road as the other vehicle passes, but it isn’t the threat of almost crashing that keeps my heart racing. It’s the flash of taillights that makes the muscle pound in my chest.
I’m worried about a damn stroke when the SUV turns into the Cerberus parking lot.
It’s knowing who is in that vehicle and what seeing me leaving this dead-end road says to the people inside.
My hands are shaking, my foot trembling uncontrollably, to the point I can hardly keep it on the gas pedal.
What I considered an amazing night has just crashed and burned.
I could play stupid. I could drive back to my apartment over the bar and pretend I didn’t see a thing, but that doesn’t seem fair as I round the final bend in the road and pull over.
I hesitate a second time as I stare down at my phone.
Knowing this will more than likely be the end of whatever it was Alex and I have, I still type out the text message before darkening my phone and driving home.
The crash is so much worse after such amazing highs. If I had known tonight would be the last, I might have done things differently. I might have stayed in bed with him a little longer. I would’ve reached for the erection he pressed against me instead of climbing out of bed.
My text goes unanswered, and I know it could be because Alex is still asleep. The second I step into my small apartment, I power off my phone completely.
I don’t need to know the exact second he sees the text, understands what it means, and puts an end to all of this.
My body is heavy, weighed down with defeat and regret rather than exhausted from everything that happened in the shower, as I collapse on my bed.
I could easily chalk what we had up to fun, and I might be able to think that way if I hadn’t let myself get in deeper with that man than I had ever planned to do.
Chapter 23
Boomer
I know I shouldn’t be surprised.
It seems like anytime I share any level of intimacy with Drake, we get busted in some way.
Drake: Just passed Ugly and the other guys on the road outside the clubhouse.
I blink at the text message as if it will disappear, but I never have such luck.
The guys were on their way back from the bar as Drake was leaving here. Fifteen minutes sooner or later and he might have been in the clear.
Fate or really crappy luck has a way of intervening though.
Drake brought Ugly home one night. He told me as much, so I know that Ugly knows exactly what Drake drives. The clubhouse is on a dead-end street, so there’s never any traffic unless it’s related to the club. The party ended just before eleven, meaning there was absolutely no reason for Drake to still be here. I’m the only single man other than the ones that went to Jake’s and there isn’t one person connected to the club that would just randomly hookup with the bartender. Not even Max, Tug, and Jasmine mix it up with those connected to the club. They save those kinks for the club in Denver.
Ugly is a smart guy, meaning it wouldn’t take long for him to deduce why Drake Hill was at the clubhouse in the middle of the night.
I close out the messaging app without responding. It’s not exactly as bad as getting caught red-handed, but I know Ugly doesn’t have the same level of couth as Aro and Slick. Ugly isn’t the type to mind his own business the way Max did at the club. I have to suspect that Tug and Jasmine know because they don’t seem the type of triad to keep any level of secrets from each other, meaning Max told them exactly what he saw in the bathroom at Hale-ish, despite none of them bringing it up to me.
I will not get as lucky with Ugly.
I can see it now—Ugly mentioning it at breakfast and Aro and Slick saying something now that the cat will be out of the bag.
I have another slow shower, if anything just to kill time. I showered right before falling into bed with Drake last night.
My heart isn’t pounding the way it was when I stepped into the hallway the night after Aro and Slick witnessed that first kiss at Jake’s. It isn’t even beating as fast as it did when I saw Max standing in the bathroom at Hale-ish.
