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“No, but…but I made a promise to protect you for life, and at the first test, I didn’t keep it.”
“You did everything you could.”
“Did I, though?” She lifts her head to stare at me with her watery eyes that mirror the color of the earth.
“Why ask that question when you know the answer?”
“Just tell me.”
I lift a brow. “Do you want my validation, Sasha?”
She nods once, and it takes everything in me not to take advantage of this moment for nefarious ends. Such as devouring her on the spot or something inappropriately similar.
“You did do your best. In fact, you went above and fucking beyond.”
“Then…why are you mad at me?”
“What makes you think I am?”
“You glared at me earlier when we left the Albanians’ nest.”
“I could’ve done that because you were unnecessarily conversing with Rai.”
“If it was only that, you wouldn’t have been distant and cold since then.”
“I’m always distant and cold.”
“You’re not right now.” The little shit smiles a little as if she said something to be proud of. “Point is, there’s something else to it.”
“How can you be so sure?”
“I just know it. Besides, you’re clearly evading the question right now.”
“Maybe I’m just trying to understand the situation better.”
“Ugh, there’s obviously more to it. You just won’t reveal it unless it’s on your terms.”
My lips twitch despite having the urge to snap her neck not too long ago. I never thought there would be a day when someone would have a deep understanding of the way I operate. My men, especially Viktor, have a basic understanding and know when to back off if they sense something isn’t adding up.
Sasha is the only one who’s always closely studying me for tells. Sometimes, she comes up empty, no matter how observant she is, but other times, like now, she hits the nail on the fucking head.
I should be angry that she even has this much of a read on me, but I’m strangely not.
Far from it.
“If you know that…” I slide my fingers up her back, enjoying the tremors that break out on her skin and the slight parting of her lips. “Why are you still asking?”
“I won’t understand if you don’t tell me. Is it something I’ve done?”
“What do you think?”
“I think it is. I just don’t know what I’ve done. No matter how many times I replay the events in my head, I come up empty. Besides, you said I did everything I could, so I’m lost here.”
“I said. You went fucking beyond.”
Her eyes widen, and I can see the exact moment she seems to understand the entire situation. “Oh.”
Fucking oh.
My hand slides from her back and I wrap it around her throat, feeling her frantic pulse point beneath my fingers. “What did I say about being a martyr, Sasha?”
“I wasn’t…I was there with Viktor and Vladislav…”
“What the fuck did I say?”
“That I shouldn’t be one, but I wasn’t. I was just doing my duty of being your bodyguard.”
“Fuck that nonsense. If you were so serious about such duties, you would’ve listened when I ordered you to stay by my fucking side.”
“But I had to cover you!”
“Viktor did that.”
“How is Viktor different from me? He can throw away his life, and I can’t? We share the same position, so I shouldn’t be scrutinized for performing the same actions he does. You’re being unreasonable right now.”
“I’m unreasonable? What about being kidnapped, assaulted, and nearly raped after having your true gender revealed in front of Rai? Is that perfectly reasonable?”
“How…did you know she figured it out?”
“I suspected it when you were talking and disgustingly smiling at each other, but I confirmed it just now when you mentioned she helped you. I’m going to take a wild guess and say she witnessed you being stripped down.”
She swallows. “She called me Aleksander afterward. I think she’ll keep the secret.”
“If you believe Rai won’t use this information against us, you’re sorely fucking mistaken.”
She shakes her head, and the sad part is that she seems to actually have faith in Rai. Maybe I should plot her assassination anyway. She has a lot of elements to threaten me with, and while that’s a disadvantage to me, it’s a ticking bomb to her life.
If I fall, I’m handcuffing her with me on the way down.
I’ll start with the secret she’s been trying to hide from the organization.
I might have to take drastic measures for this. All because fucking Sasha decided that she would be at the front line of the action and get herself kidnapped.
“We helped each other down there,” she argues. “She’s not as bad as we originally thought—”
“She wants to get to the top at any cost, and if that means exposing both of us, she’ll do it. Whether now or down the line doesn’t matter.”
“But—”
“Shh.” I place a finger on her mouth, and her lips quiver against it. “Unless it’s to promise to never, and I mean never, be a martyr again, don’t speak.”
