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My father’s waiting for me. He grins as I step around the corner, but the smile slowly fades when he sees the look on my face. “What did you do?” he says.
I stop right in front of him and jam a finger into his chest. “You set me up, you spineless asshole.”
His eyes go wide. “You can’t talk to me that way.”
“I’m calling a car. I’m not coming home.”
“Sara,” he hisses but I’m already walking away. “Sara, stop it.”
I keep going. Dad follows for a few feet, but he stops.
He must be afraid of making a scene.
I don’t cry as I get out my phone and summon an Uber. I don’t tremble as I stand outside alone in the darkness of the long driveway waiting for it.
I don’t let myself despair thinking about what I’ve given up and what’s coming for me now.
For once in my life, for the first time ever, I did the right thing.
Chapter 28
Sara
“I basically told the chief of police to go fuck himself. Are you sure you want me to stay with you?” I stare out from under a mountain of blankets on Robyn’s couch, feeling like a rundown hermit. I’m tired and my head hurts, and I’m wondering if I’m basically toxic to everyone around me at this point.
But I don’t hate myself at least.
“A little late for that, isn’t it?” She sits next to me cross-legged and hands over some coffee. I take it and feel a little better after I get some caffeine in my body, though I can’t seem to wash away the bad taste in my mouth.
I got my first glimpse into the world of politics and power, and I didn’t like it.
“Seriously, letting me crash here last night was such a big help, but I can go find a hotel,” I tell her. “You don’t need to put yourself out.”
“Stop. You’d do this for me.”
“I’m not so sure I would.”
She laughs and shrugs. “Well, I guess that means I’m a better friend than you are. Now quit acting like the world’s ending and pick yourself up, okay?”
“Yeah, right, totally. Now that the whole Dallas PD wants to put a bullet in my head, I’ll totally just shrug it off.” I groan and lean back against the couch.
“It’s that bad, huh?”
I nod slowly and cradle the mug in both hands. “It’s that bad.”
We sit in silence for a bit. Robyn’s apartment is nice: blue walls, lots of thrift store tchotchkes, plants hanging from the ceiling with pretty flowers and deep green leaves, lots of blankets and pillows and candles, very comforting and comfortable. I didn’t know where else to go after I packed my stuff and skipped out from my parents’ house after the disaster at the Oak Club, but Robyn didn’t even hesitate when I asked if I could crash on her couch.
It’s strange, having a friend like her. No matter what happens, how long we go between texts or dinners, regardless of anything, we always help each other. I’d honestly do anything for her, and I know she’d do anything for me.
For the longest time, I never understood why, but now I can see it.
These relationships matter. The relationships I choose—those are the ones that are important. I was stuck with my parents and didn’t get any say in how I was raised, but this friendship? I can leave it whenever I want, and that makes it important.
Because I choose to be here, and she chooses to have me.
“Can I ask you something?” She glances over, frowning. “I know this is random and delicate and whatever, but… I haven’t seen you drink since Brice got married.”
I nod miserably. “Yeah, that’s true.” I should be afraid. I know where this is going, but I don’t have it in me right now.
“I figured it was some diet or cleanse or whatever. You know, a few dry months? But it’s not that, is it?”
“No, it’s not.”
“You’re pregnant.”
“Yeah. I’m pregnant.” I close my eyes and sigh, leaning my head back. I was dreading telling people, but now that it’s out, it feels pretty good. I feel lighter—not better, but like there’s one fewer thing trying to crush me. “And Angelo’s the father.”
“Shit.” Robyn comes closer and hugs me. “Are you okay?”
“No, not even a little bit.” I manage to put my coffee down before I cry, but I’m basically a sobbing machine these days. It’s like the dam’s been broken and now I can’t help myself—I fall apart at the slightest hint of emotion.
Robyn’s there for me. She hugs me tight as the tears flow, and I bet she’s pretty freaked out. I’m Sara, I’m the frigid princess, the ice queen, I’m the one that’s cold and emotionless and never, ever, ever lets other people see me break down, except now I can’t help it anymore. I’m overflowing with feelings and I wish they’d stop, I wish they’d disappear and go back to the dark hole from which they came, but I’m totally overloaded.
