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Bryce answered after a beat. “Nah, he’s in Indianapolis today for something. Why?”
“It’s nothing.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Doesn’t sound like nothing. Are you quitting?”
“You wish, Barrett. No, it’s not even about work… It’s just, he’s been married a long time, right?”
Bryce nodded. “Well, kind of. Marcy is his third wife, remember?”
I pointed with my soda in hand. “If you’re looking for relationship advice, I might look elsewhere.”
Nathan shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe I need to get advice from someone who has had it fall apart.”
I pulled back in surprise. “What are you saying? You and Rebecca…?”
He shook his head. “I don’t know. Things are just hard. I can’t seem to do anything right and I’m just letting her down. Maybe she’d be better off without me.”
“Whoa. That’s crazy talk. She’s crazy about you,” I said. Rebecca had practically lived at the station while they were dating. The idea that the two of them weren’t doing well was a bit shocking.
“Maybe she used to be, but I don’t think so. Not anymore. I just don’t know what to do about it.”
The table fell silent.
“Sorry, guys. I didn’t mean to ruin your lunch. I’ll get out of your hair.”
“Don’t worry about it. You’re welcome to hang out,” Bryce offered.
“Thanks. I should probably go home. Leo was asleep when I left, but I doubt it will last for long.”
After he left, we cleaned up the kitchen and moved to the rec room.
“That’s crazy about Nate and Rebecca, isn’t it?” I asked. “Think it’s really that bad?”
“I don’t know. You never really know what’s going on inside someone’s home, you know? Maybe it’s just a rough patch.”
I knew from experience how true his words were. No one had suspected the destruction my dad had been inflicting at home. “Maybe,” was all I could say.
Matteo shrugged. “I don’t know, guys. My older sister and her husband separated when their kids were little for a while. She said it was the hardest time of her life. They were fighting all the time. No one is getting any sleep, and there’s these tiny humans completely reliant on you for everything. Sounds tough. I can see why sometimes relationships don’t make it through.”
I shook my head. “No way. If you’re in it, then you’re in it. No matter what.”
“As if you’re some kind of expert? I don’t see you walking down the aisle anytime soon.”
I chucked a tennis ball at Matteo. “Watch it, probie. You don’t know everything about me.” Like how determined I was to walk through this with Monica, even if it was hard. What I still had to figure out was how to do that.
How could I walk through it with her without being inconsiderate if she was determined to push me away?
ChapterTwelve
MONICA
I’d ignored more than a few texts from Jake since our day in Greencastle. I knew I would have to face him at small group on Monday night. He’d been right when he suggested that there was something inside me that remembered our connection, and that wasn’t something I was ready to evaluate any further. I’d considered skipping it, but he wasn’t the only person from the group texting me.
Carla: I miss you. Are you doing okay?
Mandy: Any updates? You’ll be at group right?
Unless I had a headache, I knew I needed to go. I definitely wasn’t asking Jake to pick me up, despite his kind offers. I needed some distance from him. The way he made me feel was confusing. There was an intimacy there that didn’t match with my experiences or memories. It was unsettling.
