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“I want this forever, I want you forever.” Nathan leaned in to whisper and nip at my earlobe. His admittance infused a tingling sensation from my chest as I lost my breath. I felt weightless.
Shit.
I never wanted this moment to end. Breathless nights with him were something I needed.
Slowly, I dipped myself onto him. My breathing hitched, taken away with every inch of his endeavor. Deeper and deeper, I could feel myself expand around him. The warmth of my wetness covered his shaft as I bounced on his lap.
Nathan groaned, his hands tightly gripping the cheeks of my ass. He rocked me against his heaving chest, making my toes curl as he fucked me from below. Each passing pump came quicker and quicker, winding me up, heightening my urge to cum.
“Nathan, I’m so close, don’t stop!” I quivered, squeezing my fingers into his firm chest. His panting growls laid subtly over the cupping sound of our pounding bodies. I could feel my ass turn red, marked by his firm grip as he fucked me harder than I had ever been before, making me exhale my moans loudly into the darkness of the night.
“Not yet, baby.” Nathan shot up, his chest pressing against mine. He kissed me all over, devouring my neck and lips. “I’m just getting started.” I felt weightless, his body lifting me up with ease, gripping my thighs as he carried me off the bed. My orgasm was building, edging along as he walked towards the wall, shoving me against it. The cool texture was startling, bearing witness to my sweaty back. My almost electric response caused my legs to tighten around his waist. I wrapped my hands behind his neck, squeezing as he pumped his body against mine. Our moaning breaths escaped our lips and pleaded the victorious pleasure that drove each powerful thrust.
I was on fire, my muscles responding to every inch of his long cock. In and out, in and out. He teased me. I could feel him each time, completely removed, my pussy resting between the expansion of his entrance once again.
“Please don’t ever stop!” I begged him, allowing my body to express the power of his pumping hips. He fucked me harder and harder with each thrust. My breasts bounced for his eyes, responding to his relentless speed.
“With pleasure, babe.” Nathan growled deeply, watching my every move, my every twitch of the mouth he caused. It fueled him. Each second, a passing eternity; he fucked me for what felt like hours. The more he gave, the more I wanted, hungry like a slave for his body. The control of my climax continuously slipped, teasing its eruption as he slapped my ass. It stung and made me squirm. I couldn’t hold it any longer, my body aching, impossibly defiant no longer. I was going to cum.
“Together,” I said in a barely audible gasp. Our sweaty bodies bobbed up and down, squeezing together, grinding into a tipping point of orgasmic bliss. “Now.” I let out in a weak, shuddering breath. The anticipation inside me grew, and with one final thrust of his hips, he shot me upward, his hands placed tightly around my waist.
His pumping release throbbed with contractions, filling me up as he groaned loudly. I trembled, my own bursting orgasm mirroring the texture of his flooding shots. I shook, gripping his shoulders, my legs growing weaker by the second.
I tilted my head back, hair dripping with sweat. My muscles melted onto him. I felt myself collapse into his arms, moaning as my arousal dripped down onto his drenched thighs. “Fucking perfect,” he groaned out, skipping a breath.
My weakening body gave out as he carried us back to bed. We laid on our sides, filling the room with the heat of our panting breaths. Outside, the moon hung low, its soft light brought into existence the presence of silhouetted pines. A contrast to the transactional sex with the city skyline view I’ve had in the past. Some things were not worth my time. This. I wanted this with Nathan. Everyday. I cherished this and how our bodies sat nude, illuminated in the glow of sex. Nathan wrapped his arms around me, pulling me close as he hugged me from behind.
Spooning was actually really nice and certainly not anything I was used to. Anytime Robbie and I had sex, he’d leave me alone in bed to take care of myself. Not Nathan. He sought me in the dark, unifying our bodies with the warmth of his hands and the kiss of his lips. Our fingers interlaced as we rested silently in our moment together. I spent my time admiring his big hands, amazed by the accomplishments they created. He was perfect, this was perfect, or so I thought.
In the dim light of the room, I noticed something odd. This wasn’t some psychological effect of my anxious personality. No, I was not ignorant, I knew the power of perception. This, on the other hand, was indisputable. Right before me, on Nathan’s left hand, sat the distinct pale shape of a missing wedding ring. The tanned line around it was obvious, and it terrified me.
My first thought, of course, was that he’s married. Though, his home was so bare, no photos, no feminine charm. Unlikely, but maybe divorce? I assumed the worst since that was what I was used to at this point.
“Nathan?” I asked, not looking back at him, but brushing over his ring finger.
“Yeah, babe?” He cracked his fingers in my grasp, as if he knew what I was about to ask.
I swallowed hard, and my heart pounded as I summoned up the courage to ask what I might regret. “Are you married?”Please say no, otherwise I don’t know what I’d do.My mind raced with the worst possibilities. Maybe he was a sexy convict on the run or a killer looking for his prey. All those hours I spent binging murder podcasts flashed before me. I hoped they wouldn’t make an episode about me; I couldn’t hear it if I was dead!
His breathing stiffened a bit after my question, but quickly answered, “I was married.” He paused to take a deep breath. “Emma is my late wife. Up until recently, I had been wearing my ring.”
I was an asshole. My heart tightened after hearing he had a wife. I felt awful for even mentioning it. I turned my body around to face him, burying myself into his chest. “I’m so sorry, Nathan. I shouldn’t have…” My voice trailed off. I felt like a fool, grimacing at the repeated memory.
His gaze was low, but his soft smile was reassuring as he cupped my face. “It’s ok, no need to be sorry.”
Conflicted, I was torn about asking further questions. He was so sweet, so kind and gentle. This gorgeous man was once loved by another, and they had their life, and I was sure it was filled with love. Could I have that with Robbie? Ever?
“Could I ask you something?” My voice cracked. I felt nervous to ask but needed to know. “How did you know that your wife was the one? The one you wanted to marry?”
He chuckled. His smile dispelled my own discomfort. He made this so easy, so reassuring. “Where do I begin? It feels like so long ago, and so much has happened. We met as kids, starting off as friends through middle school, but certainly she was my high school sweetheart.” My hand rested on his chest as he stared down at me. I could feel the flutter of his heart as he spoke. “She wanted to practice kissing on me, like I was some type of test dummy,” he laughed. “But I knew with that first kiss, that something was different, special even. It was a warmth, or maybe a force, a feeling that would keep me up all night, that would make me feel happy and sad all at once. Honestly, it felt bigger than me, like the universe called me to be by her side. I knew she was the one, because it felt like my purpose.” Nathan paused to breathe out. I could see the subtle gloss of his eyes, reflecting like pools of ice. “She passed in a car accident years ago. To bear the thought that I was working as a first responder that morning, her own husband being the first on scene to see the wreck and I never got to say goodbye.” His voice was low, almost chocked and lost in the thought, “I carry that with me; when she died, I died too.”
“Oh, Nathan.” I said, wiping off the tear that slid down his cheek. I leaned in to kiss his soft lips as he held me close. “I could never imagine. Not to you. I wish I could take that pain and carry it.”
“You’ve done more than you’ll ever know.” He whispered softly, caressing my face with his warm hands.
I glanced down as he kissed my forehead. Emma was Nathan’s purpose, but could I say the same for Robbie, or vice versa? Sure, I loved him, or at least I thought I did. Or maybe I loved my dream, and he was making that happen. My job, my home, my life in a city I loved. Was that enough? This, with Nathan, felt different. Better. Free.
“I want to be someone’s purpose. I’ve never known what that felt like. But I know I like how you make me feel. How you hold me, how you speak to me. You make me feel like that’s possible. Real love.” We stared into one another’s eyes, warm and naked. My head buzzed, lost in the infatuation of his touch. He wasn’t just gorgeous, he was kind and caring. It was in this moment, I realized Nathan never fed me a line. Nathan was the real deal, not the type of man that should be used as an experiment. No, he was more than that. He was a real man who sought for love, not lust.
